HANDY ADVICE

Guys Who Masturbate Will Be Met With Their Impregnated Hands In The Afterlife, Televangelist Warns

1033577_39be0d9c78d396d2e4b8e7d7d751c3a2Someone is giving Pat Robertson a run for his money.

Mücahid Cihad Han (pictured) is a popular Muslim televangelist from Turkey. He recently warned followers that men who masturbate will be greeted by their “pregnant hand in the afterlife.”

The statement came at a Q&A session during Sunday’s taping, when one of Han’s viewers asked the preacher about masturbation.

The man claimed he was addicted to pleasuring himself, saying he “kept masturbating, although he was married, and even during the Umrah,” the holy piligrimage to Mecca performed by Muslims.

Related: Sexy Magazine Drives Sperm Donor To Masturbate To Death

Han, who once called homosexuality “evil” and “the worst of all sins,” scolded the man, telling him that Islam strictly forbids masturbation.

“One hadith states that those who have sexual intercourse with their hands will find their hands pregnant in the afterlife,” he cautioned.

The televangelist continued: “If our viewer was single, I could recommend he marry, but what can I say now? … Resist Satan’s temptations!”

Unfortunately, rather than offering clarity, the statement only created more confusion, as the Internet was soon abuzz with followup questions, including: Are there gynecologists in the afterlife? Is abortion allowed there? What about adoption? But, perhaps most importantly, how exactly will the hand give birth?

Related: More And More Men Are Refusing To Masturbate And Here’s Why