size queens

If Marc Jacobs Didn’t Marry Lorenzo Martone For Love, He Married Him For Pleasure

Not only does the fashion designer’s beau Lorenzo Martone confirm the two did, in fact, get married in St. Bart’s last month, but that Mr. Martone absolutely fits the Brazilian stereotype of well-endowed men: “I can’t complain. My boyfriend can’t complain.” Which says less about Martone, and more about why Jacobs left Jason Preston.

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26 Comments

  • Mr. Enemabag Jones

    I don’t know. I saw the pics of Jason Preston and the boy is hung. All I figure is, Jason was white trash, and that was no longer trendy. Brazillians are all the rage now, So Marc just had to get himself one.

    Whatever happened to Czech boys? They were the shit, now nobody talks about them.

  • Jon

    F-U Queerty. . .you’ve hit a new low.

  • I pliss

    I think it’s all about the stretch! lol

  • Qjersey

    Yeah more stereotypes from Queerty. Not all brazilians are hung, nor are all black men. Trust. I’ve done the research.

  • RomanHans

    I am absolutely mesmerized by the various people a promiscuous, ex-drug addict, publicity-hound clothing designer dates. Please please PLEASE keep me informed on a daily, if not hourly, basis, and make sure you include guesses on the penis sizes of all involved along with suggestions of the sex acts they might try. In fact, can any of you guys draw?

  • A now confused John from England

    @Qjersey: Lol! All the black and brazillians have been huge!

  • Lukas P.

    When the sex is over and done with…. Is the man with the fascinating penis interesting to be around *after* the three hours a day we spend having sex? Does he thrill us, challenge us, and make us better better men? Can he hold his own in a conversation, can he put up with our eccentricities and our emotional baggage? All good questions to consider.

  • Grunt

    I slept with Jason Preston a couple times in 2004, pre-MJ, and it was 9 inches – and really nice. and some of the best sex I’ve ever had. (and yes, I’ve since been tested.) That’s why MJ put up with him for so long, I’m sure! So sketchy and vacuous, but so sexy and fun in bed.

  • hoganbcmj

    @Jon:

    Ya, I agree it’s a new low. But at least they’re not afraid to acknowledge the secret shame (among many) of the gay community: that cock size is the number one priority that motivates sexual attraction (and is often confused with romantic attraction) among the most A-list and shallow groups of gays. Guys with big cocks are automatically lifted up the social ladder and put on a very high and shaky pedestal, while guys with smaller cocks are very blatantly ostracized and discredited, even though no one talks about it or wants to admit it. I can’t say I’m immune to this myself, but it’s something we need to work on a community and is a symptom of a larger problem gays have: shallowness and the over-focus on bodies and looks over substance.

  • Lukas P.

    FOUR hours a day, I meant!

  • Jaroslaw

    #10 very well said. I went on a number of blind dates, never misrepresented myself but nonetheless the telephone conversations seemed sparkling but after the date no one called back or returned my calls. What can I conclude is the reason other than I don’t look like a fashion model?

    Frankly, after volunteering at Gay things, going to Gay church, etc. and not even getting a nibble, (or occasionally only attracting those with super serious issues) at the ripe old age of 50 I’m tired of looking. In fact, why am I even here on Queerty anymore?

  • Jaroslaw

    Forgot to say I had quite a number of girls hit on me….but I wasn’t going to be dishonest with them.

  • scott ny'er

    i don’t get the big dick love. Doesn’t that hurt like hell?

  • TheInsider

    Alexander McQueen, RIP, was not a media whore as Marc Jacobs. Jacobs could learn a thing or two about making great clothes and less self-promotion.

  • SouLKid

    @ Scott ny’er
    At first yea but after a while…well. A small dick is really uncomfortable. It doesn’t reach the spot. lol.

  • pogobock

    This is all Obama’s fault.

  • benlayvey

    @SouLKid: Perhaps it’s “the spot” that is too far in. Ever thought of that?

  • Scrufff

    Brazilian here – i got a big one. So do my male cousins (don’t ask.) Alas my poor brother, not so much – there’s always a black sheep in every family ;-)

  • Rhydderch

    @Scrufff: Are you and your cousins free tonight?

  • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

    @Rhydderch: No!! :-0 Lulz!

  • zenflo

    A shirtless doll (modeled after your body circa 2000, no less) on a cake is tacky.

  • zenflo

    Especially a wedding cake. (And be wary of the cream filling.)

  • SouLKid

    Get off it Zenflo…Marc Jacobs body still looks like tht.

  • Lukas P.

    Who married whom? Check it out: Wedding cake statue on the right side of photo looks suspiciously like the current US president. Look closely. Uh oh. Poor Michelle O.

    Let’s not forget the ‘Jacobs’ “marriage” has no legal status in the US! It made for fun photos but no tax advantages, right?

  • THeAwfulTruth

    Tacky tacky tacky…

Comments are closed.