A British man is reminding gays across the world not to let down their guard on dating apps just because you’re in a remote location where the pickings are slim.
In a series of TikTok videos, 26-year old Olly Lewis, who splits his time living and working in the U.K. and Central Australia, shares his bizarre story of being catfished in the Australian Outback, and how being bored in the middle of a desert without many options may have allowed him to discount some serious red flags.
“All right, so I thought catfishing was something that happened on like scripted reality TV shows, or, like, to people who just aren’t very internet savvy, but no, it has actually just happened to me, and I’m shook”, he begins.
Okay, we’re intrigued….
He goes on to explain that a month ago he moved to a resort in central Australia to live and work, and describes being “in a desert in the middle of nowhere”, in a place where there’s “not a lot of people around.”
He decides to download “a certain app”, and it turns out there’s about four people around, which was about what he expected. Suddenly, someone with a blank profile messages him, so he assumes it’s probably someone closeted or on the D.L. He finally gets a photo, and it’s this hot, well-built guy he sees all the time at the gym… hence Olly’s catchy nickname of “Handsome Discreet Gym Boy”.
Since Olly feels this might be his only option for awhile, he agrees to make plans to meet, but the guy ends up ghosting him until the next morning. Okay, missed opportunity, right? It happens. About a week goes by and they are chatting again semi-regularly, until things start to get “unhinged”, according to Olly.
The guy starts acting really weird and controlling, telling Olly he can’t message other people, and even starts mention… marriage?!
Olly chalked it up to maybe some cultural differences, or even a slight language barrier, and acknowledges that out there in such a remote place, he didn’t have much else going on to entertain him.
“Handsome Discreet Gym Boy” even started talking about “sizing up my ring”. Olly assumed that was a sexual thing, but he was actually talking about a wedding ring.
That would probably be a big enough red flag for most of us, but Olly warns being in a remote place can do strange things to your judgement.
The story only gets weirder from here.
When Olly sees the mystery guy out one night in the local “residents club”, he finds it odd that he doesn’t look over at him even once. Olly ends up going back with friends to a someone’s house, which turns out to be “Handsome Discreet Gym Boy’s” best friend’s house… and he’s there!
Again, they made no contact, so Olly assumed the guy must be closeted. Later, when the messaging continues, he plays dumb and asks the stud if that was indeed him at the party last night. Much to his surprise, the guy says, “Yeah, why didn’t you speak to me?” Then he tells him he should have just come up and kiss him. Whaaaat?
“This was NOT the vibe he was giving off at all”, Olly shares in the next part of his video.
Later on, Olly sees “Handsome Discreet Gym Boy” out yet again, and this time he throws his own party with all of Olly’s friends, so of course Olly must go! He proceeds to get really drunk and gives him “the eyes” all night. He even thinks he’s getting the eyes back, but upon reflection, realizes maybe this guy was just uncomfortable.
When he and his friends leave, he decides to go back to the house, knocks on the door, and says, “Do you want to hang out for a bit?” The guy looks him dead in the eyes and says “no” and slams the door.
Assuming that he’s just as weird in person as he is online, he later asks in the app why he didn’t want to hang out, but the guy says he was just “tired from working late”. Olly is thinking, “Why would you throw a party if you were tired from work?” It’s just not making sense!
The next day, “Handsome Discreet Gym Boy” sits down three tables away from him at the resort where they are staying to eat lunch. Okay, here we go… But suddenly the dating app notifies him he has a message from the guy. He looks over, and his phone isn’t even up on the table! Then he checks the distance, and it says “1 km away”. Huh?
“My face dropped, and I just have this moment of realization”, Olly says. He is finally starting to see the light.
Olly quickly blocks the guy, but then unblocks him, wanting to do some more investigation. After all, there’s not too much excitement in the Outback. Olly confronts the catfisher, who gets defensive and aggressive, saying things like “Don’t you trust me?”
Olly quickly springs into action and asks the guy where he had lunch today. The answer is, of course wrong, considering “Handsome Discreet Gym Guy” was only three tables away from him mere hours earlier.
“It turns out that “Handome Discreet Gym Boy” is actually “Catfish Discreet Bullshit Boy”, Olly quips in the next part of his opus.
In the end, Olly presents his evidence about the lies, and the jig is up. The guy admits he isn’t who he portrayed, and tells him that he’s in love with him and doesn’t want to reveal who he is. Olly tells him, “If you love me, like you say you do, you’ll tell me.”
Finally on the bus one day, he gets an expiring photo. It’s of someone who works in the same building as him, who’s about 20 years older than his profile says, and who “isn’t the handsome charming gym goer that I’ve been envisaging while having these conversations.”
Needless to say, Olly is floored that he’s going to have to see this guy at work (if this is even the real guy!), plus he’s likely going to have to run into the “Handsome Discreet Gym Guy”, whose pictures were stolen and used.
“The whole situation is just scrambling me head,” Olly screams. “I’m not going to trust anyone on social media from now on!”
Despite this desert wanderer having to experience what he did, we’re certainly thankful for the stark warning. No matter how desolate things seem, and how limited the options are out there, we should be careful not to overlook obvious red flags. Catfishing is real, even when the desert mirages are not.
Tombear
Men are pigs! Thank you Jesus!
jp47
Umm, so Ollie is in the middle of nowhere Australia and because there aren’t a lot of people there he believes all the b.s. from the catfisher. I say Ollie is tremendously naive, extremely horny, or both. The red flags were flapping in the breeze from the very beginning. He should have blocked the guy then.
bachy
Just goes to show how loneliness, being horny and booze can undermine rational thinking. Poor Ollie got spun round & round – and still doesn’t know which way is up.
Wheelerman
Hah! Ollie should’ve had furry Nev Schulman on the job! This would have made a great episode of Catfish.
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winemaker
This is the same scenario as meeting somebody you see at the gym that won’t give you the time of the day at the gym despite being friendly and approchable, then you run into them at a local bar, they smile at you when you catch their eye, their eye darts away and you get mixed signals, are they interested or are they playing games? At least face to face you can determine mutual interest and attraction and if the other party plays childish games, best case scenario, ignore them. They’re a waste of time if they can’t be up front with you. Sadly with these anomous apps, it’s a crap shoot meeting genuine guys who want to meet somebodygenuine and are tired of the BULLSHIT and childish games or dealing with fakes, flakes, liaras, losers and game players. This is nothing more than an on line verson of the personal ads that used to be relegated to the back pages of the gay newspapers. It comes with the territory, sad to say.