loser ted

Once again, someone from Ted Cruz’s past emerges to remind the world of his lifelong unpopularity

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Ted Cruz

The stories about Ted Cruz‘s unpopularity are legendary. His senate colleagues can barely hide their disdain for him, while his attempts to act like a normal human being almost always backfire.

Awkward and repellent, it’s especially uncomfortable when Cruz attempts to insult other people. The professional sh*tposter recently opined on the controversy involving ex-RNC chair Ronna McDaniel’s new contract with NBC News, only for a former campaign colleague to put him in his place.

NBC staffers are outraged over the network’s decision to hire McDaniel, given her election denialism and adversarial relationship with the media as RNC head. Cruz, who prioritizes social media engagement over governance, decided to weigh in with a predictable argument of whataboutism.

Cruz’s post has been viewed more than 1.2 million times, which probably makes him smile. It’s also generated hundreds of replies, including one from Reed Galen, a former GOP operative and co-founder of The Lincoln Project.

Galen, who worked with Cruz on George W. Bush’s 2000 presidential campaign, shared some insight into his reputation as a political staffer. Spoiler alert: “Cancún Ted” was hardly the life of the party.

In fact, other staffers actively tried to avoid him after work, according to Galen.

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“Little known story. On the 2000 George W. Bush campaign, every evening a staffer was sent to find out where @tedcruz was going after work. The rest of the team would then go somewhere else,” he posted.

That’s pretty harsh, though we would expect nothing less from a man whose mere presence in the hallway scared away coeds when he was an undergrad, his ex-college roommate says (more on him in a moment).

But for now, let’s enjoy Cruz getting dunked on, shall we? It’s a political pastime that never gets old.

Galen’s comeback is the second time Cruz has been humiliated online in as many weeks. Last week, the gay-hating pol attempted to troll out California state senator Scott Wiener, who expressed outrage over Cruz’s bigoted questioning of a Muslim judicial nominee.

But unfortunately for Ted, he got his wieners confused…

Happens to the best of us!

Cruz, of course, was referring to Anthony Weiner, the former New York congressman who resigned in disgrace over a sexting scandal. Suffice to say, the two wieners are very different!

Days later, Cruz’s inaccurate smear job is still up, for some reason.

But there is a benefit to Cruz keeping up his misleading post: it allows the actual Scott Wiener to respond. The two attended Harvard Law School together, despite Cruz’s apparent ignorance about his one-time classmate.

Wiener, like many people who have crossed paths with Ted, had some embarrassing tea to spill.

Wiener’s recollection of his alienated classmate jives with Mazin’s description of Cruz as an undergrad. The successful screenwriter, who most recently was the executive producer of the hit HBO series The Last of Us, has been humiliating Cruz online for over a decade.

One of Mazin’s most notable digs came in 2016, when he shared some perspective regarding Cruz’s support for a law that banned the sale of sex toys in Texas.

“Ted Cruz thinks people don’t have a right to ‘stimulate their genitals.’ I was his college roommate. This would be a new belief of his,” he posted.

Another favorite came the following year, when Mazin dished on Cruz’s account “liking” a pornographic tweet. “Sadly, the fact that Ted Cruz jacks off to mediocre porn spam is the most human thing we can say about him. This is actually his high point,” he wrote.

In general, Cruz being linked to any sort of promiscuous behavior is repulsive, especially when the Christian conservative brings up the topic himself. Last year, he shared his opinion on what women want in bed.

Predictably, the reactions weren’t kind.

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Ted Cruz talking “weenies” was not something we were waiting to hear.

As one can see, Cruz has only gotten cringier in adulthood. His fellow senators, much like his college classmates, prefer to stay away.

As Al Franken said: “I like Ted Cruz more than most of my other colleagues like Ted Cruz. And I hate Ted Cruz.”

Lindsey Graham, meanwhile, once joked that if somebody killed “Ted Cruz on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was in the Senate, nobody would convict you.”

On the positive side, lawmakers may only have to put up with Cruz for another nine months or so. He promises to be involved in a tight reelection battle this fall, likely against Texas rep. Colin Allred.

If past is prologue, it’s only a matter of time before Cruz tries to insult his presumptive Democratic rival, only to fall on his face…again!

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