Anal sex. It’s a thing that happens. Especially when you’re gay.
Bespoke Surgical, a private gay proctological and anal surgery practice with offices in New York City and Los Angeles, interviewed 300 gay men of various ages about their anal sex habits.
Here’s what they found:
- 13% of gay men have anal sex daily
- 39% of gay men have it a couple times a week
- 24% of gay men have it a couple times a month
- 5 in 6 gay men have it at least a few times a year
- One in six has it less than once a year
The breakdown of guys who identify as tops, bottoms, or versatile was fairly even. 39% said they prefer topping, compared to 33% who said they are vers, and 29% who said they prefer being on bottom.
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Related: Let’s talk about ‘g0ys,’ gay men who are so opposed to anal sex that they’ve created a little club
When it comes to hygiene, the vast majority of guys are very thoughtful. 78% said they think about hygiene always or most of the time during anal sex, compared to just 9% who never do.
Other stats about hygiene:
- 42% of men always or frequently use an anal cleanser prior to having anal sex, compared to 38% who rarely or never do, and 21% sometimes do.
- When it comes to cleansers, 25% say they prefer a water-based enema, 20% use a saline enema, and 18% use a shower adapter.
- 61% say they feel “cleaner” if they used an anal cleanser post-coitus.
Related: The number of gay men who didn’t use a condom the last time they had anal sex may surprise you
So there you have it, folks. Everything you could possibly want to know (and more!) about the anal sexing habits of your gay brethren.
Blackceo
Whatever bottoms are within that 13% have got some loose ass walls.
ChrisK
You mean like your head?
Blackceo
^^^ What kind of confusing attempt at shade was that?
OzJosh
You couldn’t be more wrong. The sphincter is a muscle, and like all muscles the more you use it, the stronger it is. Guys who bottom frequently invariably have stronger, tighter sphincters, and more control over them. That’s a medical fact. The notion that guys who have loads of anal sex will be “loose” is just homophobic nonsense. Similarly, the notion that an anal virgin will be “tight” is also misguided; they’ll possibly be nervous about it and tense, which is not the same thing as tight. It really is about time gay men knew more about their butts and stopped spreading ignorance and misinformation.
Blackceo
OzJosh its because of the repeated anal sex that it feels looser. Medically, no. You are correct in that unless you are getting fisted or shoving big dildos up there daily, you won’t stay loose. Even after getting smashed by a 10+ your external sphincter will stretch, but then get tight again. However, those who engage in regular anal sex have learned how to become accustomed to it and therefore are more relaxed, which gives a looser feeling. In my experience with guys who had lots of anal sex thats how it felt to me. I’m not spreading anything. I know how it feels when I f*ck guys who bottom on a daily and those who don’t. There’s a difference. Carry on.
Crystix
Sounds like you jealous BlackCEO. Guessing you the one in six of that statistic
Blackceo
Crystix…..sure I’m jealous, as I look over at my husband and he laughs at the notion that I’m jealous. Sure, boo.
the_ashpan
Ha Ha Ha that’s what I thought….then I read the comments below by what I assume to be stereotypical gay guys and it sucked the fun out of the article.
Sam6969
Thanks to OzJosh and Blaceo for the interesting details, it was educating. Another question: can the proctologist see if a man is sodomized (even just monthly) and how?
(Also, how much time is required for the sphincter to be tight again?)
Thanks 😉
Esscourt
Why didn’t the survey include rimming? How many men make sure there is no fecal matter present when the partner is munching down there?
tnguy222
A hole needs just a hint of flavor for taste when rimming a sweet, smooth butt….
CastleSF
People who are into this particular fetish must be a man pleaser. How could anyone even want to put his tongue in that area and still get turned on? Of course to each his own but I just don’t understand at all.
tnguy222
I bet you are a terrible Lay. Just awful and boring. Zero passion whatsoever.
batesmotel
Not sure about those numbers. I’ve found there are more gay bottoms out there than gay tops.
Sam6969
That’s what I thought, as well.
frankcar1965
Typical gay lie, “I’m a top” as they throw themselves down and put those legs in the air. They can’t get over that nasty feeling they get when they bottom.
the_ashpan
I thought this article was going to be interesting…..but instead its a couple of loose stats based of 300 guys…..then a load of childish bitching……jeeeez, Blackceo makes an off the cuff comment and the childishness rears it’s head from a few guys….what the hell??
JerseyMike
Being a TRUE versatile guy, I think there are a lot more bottoms than tops… Ultimately I want a TRUE versatile guy. You get the best of both worlds. I believe TRUE versatile guys are rare. If someone does not clean they will be put on the do not call/block list. I know what it’s used for but at least make an effort.
PinkoOfTheGange
Any one else want to know the LA to NYC breakdown of Top, Vers and Bot?
Heywood Jablowme
Good point! In my experience NYC is very toppy. LA is the opposite, overwhelmingly bottoms – & pretty desperate bottoms, with so much competition!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
My Arse. Totally worthless self-selective survey.
Heywood Jablowme
Shocking that men would LIE to pollsters about how much sex they’re having!
tjr101
No way there’s more tops than bottoms.
Sam6969
“When it comes to hygiene, the vast majority of guys are very thoughtful. 78% said they think about hygiene always or most of the time during anal sex, compared to just 9% who never do. ”
“42% of men always or frequently use an anal cleanser prior to having anal sex, compared to 38% who rarely or never do, and 21% sometimes do.”
>Then, if 78% of them think about hygiene DURING anal sex and only 42% use a cleanser BEFORE, what is happening with the 37% in between?
I think it must be very uncomfortable to think of cleaning things up, while in the heat of the intercourse…Or, they just tell themselves : “oups! I forgot it again”? (or the intercouse was not expected?). Or they are not sure they did the cleansing right?
Sam6969
Obviously, 36% (78-42), not 37% 😉
DHT
If you really don’t understand this then you really haven’t thought about it. Unless you have planned you don’t clean, sex isn’t always planned, and no guy walks around cleaned all the time. I always let my partner know, you would be surprised how many tops really don’t care and don’t want to wait for you to clean. Granted sometimes I just say no because I am aware it would be unpleasant.
ChrisK
If I was a bottom I’d be doing fiber supplements every day. You do enough and you’ll be clean and ready for any moment.
frankcar1965
You put your hand in the fire and you get burned, you put your dick in a butt hole and you get shit on it, sometimes at least. Things aren’t always planned so get over it.
tnguy222
To me, Brad paisley summarizes it best, “you gotta get a little mud on the tires.”
If you don’t get a little on your dick, you’re just not hitting it right.
Sam6969
Actually, It was just a bit difficult for me to figure out I could have such an intimate intercourse without knowing it in advance…but I am quite inexperienced (on either side) in that department :))
Thanks to all of you for sharing your experience and advice 🙂
jason_melvil
Correct me if I’m wrong here, but it says 42% of all men, not 42% of all bottoms…
It’s quite likely that 78% of men care about hygine, but since half of those (basedo n the survey) are tops, they don’t bother cleam themselves.
So only about half bother cleaning themselves.
Sam6969
jason_melvil :
Considering cleansing prior to having anal sex is generally the job of the “bottom”, I think we can infer that the writers refer to gay bottom and versatile men. Let’s see if they are more precise in the original article: https://www.bespokesurgical.com/2018/02/05/anal-sex-prep-practices-gay-men-straight-women-compare/
It reads: “Only 42% of gay male respondents report always or frequently using an anal cleanser beforehand, while 38% rarely or never do.”
So, it is almost the same wording as in the Queerty article and in both cases they do not refer explicitly to “gay bottom and versatile men”, but we can reasonably infer it.
On the other hand, if they really refer to 78% of ALL gay men thinking of hygiene during anal sex, then we cannot make any conclusions, because of this lack of precision: we do not know how many bottom/versatile men among them think of hygiene…(and the splitting 50/50 or others won’t work, as they would be pure assumptions)
I inferred they were talking about 78% of bottom/versatile men, but as you pointed out, we cannot make any conclusion, if they are really talking about all the gay men in the study.
Anyway, as some people suggested: reading the imprecise report, it does not seem to be a thorough study, particularly when you realize the survey was done online. Was it interactive or just an online quiz?
Greg
Nothing spoils the mood more than shit on a dick. Not even the stink.
rmarin776
Not only is it completely annoying to have to do an enema before every sexual experience, but it’s also not great for your body. AND a lot of times, it doesn’t even work. So, find a guy who doesn’t think sex is dirty, eat clean and enjoy yourself without all the hang ups guys.
gothvixen
Only men have and enjoy anal sex? How informative! I squirt from it, there’s a button that gets pressed…It’s not urine, totally different scent and taste, and just keeps coming when your bladder’s empty
surreal33
This survey has the distinct aroma of bullshit. First and most important as life-long New Yorker, 80% of the men I meet are total bottoms! I have wet dreams were 39% of gay men are tops however the reality is quite the contrary. Also, most casual sex participants DO NOT engage in anal intercourse as it viewed as dirty and unsafe. Oral sex yes Sir, anal sex no thank you.
Minerva Pomerantz
You mean that the sample of the 300 participants were men already going to a proctological surgical group? Quelle suprise!
Kangol
Interesting and informative stats, but I thought we were going to learn some new information on anal sex, particularly since it was coming from a physician who specializes in working with gay, bi and trans people (also, he’s surgeon).
Lacuevaman
if it was a two-way street, there’d be a stop light
IanHunter
Better have that butthole washed out with an enema!
Sebastian
I’m a bottom and try to make sure I’m “clean “ ALMOST every day . Only just n case my guy is in some playful mood. Even if I’m not , he tends to know how to get me there, so it’s a just n case thing. Yes he’s caught me not being able to shower but I honestly think he tries too sometimes. I love being Clean but if he wants it right then and there he doesn’t care to wait for my 45 min shower to be over lol.. yes I’m a clean hygiene freak .
Greg
45 minutes? Get in there, clean it out and let’s go.