Frankensteined

What’s It Like To Be Circumcised At 25? (Hint: It’s Pretty Horrifying)

Embryotomy-Scissors

“My penis looked like a pig in a blanket: Gauze was wrapped around the shaft, and I could see only a little bit of the tip,” Lionel Wills recalls in a new article titled That’s When I Realized They Had Completely Frankensteined My Dick: Life After Circumcision At Age 25. “And there was a considerable amount of blood on the bandage. I started pinching it out of sadistic curiosity because it was still numb from the local anesthetic.”

Related: More And More Adult Men Are Snipping Off Their Foreskin And Here’s Why

Wills was born with phimosis, a rare condition where the foreskin of the penis is so tight it can’t retract to expose the head. Phimosis affects just 1 percent of males 17 and older.

“My foreskin was strangling the head of my penis,” he recalls. “[It] was so tight it would fill up like a balloon when I peed and I had to, like, milk my dick like it was an udder just to get the piss out. And it would spray everywhere.”

Wills also couldn’t have sex without feeling excruciating pain.

“My foreskin was so tight it would rip and bleed during sex,” he says. “Afterward, it would heal and scar. And scar tissue doesn’t have the same elasticity as normal tissue, so that would make it even tighter.”

When he was 25, Wills decided to undergo a circumcision in hopes of correcting the problem.

“I had absurd concerns before the surgery, like they might make some terrible mistake and cut off the knob,” he recalls. “The worst part was anticipating what it would look like underneath. Just seeing the blood on the bandage, and not being able to feel it?—?my imagination was working.”

When the anesthetic finally did wear off and Wills was able to unwrap the bandages, he was horrified.

“They had completely Frankensteined my dick,” he says “In removing my foreskin, they removed the skin that connected the head of my penis to my shaft, leaving a gap of exposed penis flesh. So they had to stitch together the remaining skin on my shaft to my head to cover up the gap.”

But it gets worse.

Related: Man Goes To Hospital For Circumcision, Wakes Up With No Penis

Wills continues, “In my case, however, when they put the stitches in, they misaligned where the skin on my shaft should meet the head of my penis. Imagine putting a dress shirt on and the buttons are off by a hole, except it’s your penis. The seam of my penis?—?the ridge of skin that runs along the bottom of the shaft?—?wasn’t a straight line anymore. It was twisted.”

He describes the whole experience as “shitty.”

For the next several days, Wills lived in constant fear of getting an erection. When it finally happens, however, he was overcome with a sense of “relief.”

“It happened a few days after the surgery while I was walking around a bookstore,” he remembers. “The base and the knob were simultaneously pulling at the stitches, and I was worried about them exploding?—?that they’d rupture and it’d be gross, Frankenstein flesh. But that didn’t happen.”

Phew!

Sex also improved.

“There’s no ripping,” Wills says, “even though I have decreased sensitivity. But I didn’t even think about my new dick the first time I had sex afterward. I was just psyched to be having sex. Appreciating the sensation of a circumcised penis was secondary. It wasn’t like ‘Wow, having sex without foreskin is great.’ It was like ‘Cool. This works.’ Then I went back to focusing on the sex.”

“There’s a beauty and simplicity to a circumcised penis,” he concludes. “Sleek. Functional. It now looks like what it was meant to be?—a torpedo rather than an anteater.”

Related: Circumcised Men May Soon Be Able To Regrow Their Foreskin Thanks To New Miracle Therapy

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