‘Tis the damn season… and bottoms rejoice! The Bottom’s Digest‘s very own Alex Hall is here to tell you that you can have your cake and eat it too—or, in this case, not starve yourself on Thanksgiving and still get plowed after dessert! In a conversation with Queerty, Alex shares some tips for how to stay “active/ready” after your big turkey dinner tomorrow. Whatever mischief you might have planned, remember to be safe, spend time with the ones you love, and obviously have fun. Bon appétit!
QUEERTY: To start… Fiber aside, what are some general tips you can offer to make a meal more bottom-friendly?
HALL: A lot of things! Number one: We all have different bodies. You have to know that about yourself. And you don’t have to keep a food journal. But even keeping notes in your phone—when you have dinner with a friend or someone you’re not going to sleep with, that is the most prime time to really zone in on your threshold of what you can and cannot have—can be helpful. So that’s number one. See what works for you.
Number two: Cruciferous vegetables are some of the biggest culprits! That’s like broccoli, Brussels sprouts, and cabbage. Those just have the most immediate effect on gas and bloating, and it can last all day sometimes for some people. Dairy is another one. Even if you’re not lactose intolerant, dairy can be tricky. It can make prep kind of disastrous because it doesn’t have any fiber in it at all. You don’t have to be dairy-free, you can just be dairy-free for a couple of hours before you bottom. It’s that simple.
And obviously, as high fiber as possible. At Thanksgiving, everything has pumpkin in it. And guess what? Pumpkin is loaded with fiber! Another thing that I think really surprises people is picking white bread and white pasta over whole wheat just before bottoming. So if you’re having a date night, or even a hookup, and you’re making pasta, it’s better to make white pasta than whole wheat pasta.
But the overarching lesson is to really to get in tune with your body and know what works for you and what doesn’t. So that you can go out to a restaurant, know what you can order, and then go home and get plowed.
Ha! The best of both worlds!
Yeah, just saying!
In terms of holiday dishes, is it more challenging to make them bottom-friendly being that a lot of them are hearty and potentially heavy?
Funny enough, a lot of our recipes aren’t really that hard to make bottom-friendly. You need to swap out the dairy on a lot of stuff. Meat is okay, like turkey, as long as there’s other stuff with fiber complementing. Like, stuffing is loaded with fiber. Sweet potato casserole is loaded with fiber. Mashed potatoes are loaded with fiber. All of these things have a lot of fiber in them. But it’s the dairy and the quantity. That’s where, like, I can’t control… That’s, like, up to…
Yeah, or the person making their plate! That’s where a lot of us go wrong on Thanksgiving. Overloading. Ask yourself: “What’s my goal? What do I want to get into after?” Once you have that part answered then you can be like, “OK, maybe I don’t mess with grandma’s mashed potatoes, with dairy, and I just have more turkey and stuffing and stuff like that.”
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What’s your signature dish that you like to bring to Friendsgiving or family dinners?
My macaroni is like legit famous and I put it on The Bottom’s Digest. She’s a good one!
Amazing! And I think we touched on it briefly already, but what are some other holiday dishes that are a hard pass?
Anything that’s “blank”-cream. Those would probably be hard passes. I’m from the South, so there’s literally creamed broccoli salad. And that’s not gonna work!
Danger zone right there.
Yeah, that’s gonna be a no-go. And it’s OK to ask questions. Like, “Does this have a lot of milk in it?” Sweets are another killer. Let up on the sweets a little bit because that sugar can really get things turning.
Yeah. Sugar can cause a lot of gas on its own, which is really interesting. But, again, it’s all about balance. At the end of the day, it’s really about the quantity. Maybe not stuffing your plate to the rim. But if you do, live your life! But, like, number one, just keep an eye out for those cruciferous vegetables. Turkey all day! Have as much as you want! But cruciferous veggies and dairy seriously chop if you’re planning to bottom after.
Cruciferous vegetables. Wow, okay, that’s a severe tongue twister right there.
Yeah. When I first got started doing all of this, that really was a tongue twister.
Literally! I’m, like, that’s too many syllables!
I work with many dietitians and doctors for a lot of this information. Because I want this to be widely available to people. We’re very adamant about making this as ethical and information-packed as possible.
You mentioned pumpkin is pretty high in fiber. So, pumpkin pie. Can that be indulged? What’s the tea on her?
Pumpkin pie actually typically has condensed milk in it. But again, pumpkin pie is one of the easiest things to make dairy-free. There’s condensed coconut milk now! I might have a can right behind me actually—I sure do!
LOL! There we go! She said, “I’m prepared!”
I know! Welcome to my little studio!
Scroll down for some of Alex’s favorite bottom-friendly recipes below…
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Bottom-friendly scalloped potatoes
(Essentially potato gratin but it’s 100% dairy-free!)
Scalloped potatoes (aka potato gratin) is back on the menu for us bottoms ?? Full recipes is above the caption ?? #potatotiktok #potatogratin #scallopedpotatoes #dairyfree #asmr #asmrfood #asmrcooking #gaytok???? #queer #queertok #ibstok #ibstiktok #ibs
Bottom-friendly pumpkin pie
(I made this over the weekend and finished it in one sitting… AND I FELT GREAT AFTER!)
Alex’s iconic bottom-friendly dairy-free mac n’ cheese
(I also made this over the weekend, and I’ve never had a mac n’ cheese dairy-free alternative this good. 11/10!)
Bottom-friendly mac n’ cheese will fill your needs ? dairy-free, low FODMAP, and just the right amount of fiber, this Mac n’ cheese isn’t gonna make you feel bloated and cramped like ol’ Kraft out of the box. #macncheese #macaroni #macandcheese #macandcheeserecipe #dairyfree #dairyfreecheese #pastatiktok #pastatiktok #cheesetok #easydinnerideas #easylunchideas #cookingtiktok #foodie #foodtiktok #foodtok #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtq???? #lgbt? #gay #gayy #gayyy #queer #queertiktok #queertok #bi #ibs #ibstok #gaytiktok #gaytok???? #bottoming #bottomingtips
EDITOR’S NOTE: This interview has been edited for length and clarity.