When gay Reddit users got to talking about their biggest fears, the responses ranged from specific phobias (fires, swarming insects, and the like) to existential anxieties (lonely deaths, unfulfilled dreams, etc.) and even to geopolitical concerns.
Many commenters seconded others’ fears, while one person clapped back at another’s comment, as you’ll see below.
Here, presented in no particular order and edited for readability, are selected comments from that thread. Maybe don’t read these if you’re trying to fall asleep, though…
“Looking back at the end of my life and having more regrets than things I’m proud of.”
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“Dying alone.”
“Dying alone and broke.”
“Never reaching and living none of my dreams and being doomed to a routine, gray life while everybody lives their best life, and hitting some moment in my life where I feel like I wasted my whole life and it’s worth nothing. Lately, I’ve been feeling a lot like that, like I’m obsolete and my time is over, and I’m not even in my 20s. And I’m claustrophobic. And a little fear of the dark is still there, remaining from my childhood.”
Related: Reddit users list the “main advantages” of being gay
“Never finding love.”
“Having a slow death.”
“Forgetting my memories.”
“Actual fear? Bees. Emotional fear? Closing myself off.”
“Dementia, house fires, and living longer than my significant other.”
“Living in Sweden, right now it’s Russia winning in Ukraine and continuing their rampage westwards. Especially if our NATO application doesn’t go through.”
“Ants.”
“First, I’m terrified of dying by decapitation. Second, I’m afraid of being killed and eaten by a cannibal.”
“Having a stroke and not being able to communicate that I need some anxiety meds!”
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“Mortal fear: either having Alzheimer’s (because I’m going to die by literally having the memories ripped from me) or dying by something that is so embarrassing/stupid. I do not want to be a real-life case of 1000 Ways to Die. Emotional fear: being found out by my family/friends. I don’t think I’ll be in any real danger if my family and straight friends found out I was gay (even though I do have friends who are civilized homophobes), but they sure as hell would not be happy with me. I also have a fear of past regrets and future hold-backs.”
“Becoming irrelevant.” (Another commenter responded: “This is real. When I was in a different chapter of life, I had better income, health, responsibilities at work, etc. I was seen and heard. As these things get chipped away, I’m becoming invisible.”)
“Never being successful.”
“[The] future. I feel like I have no plan for my future at all. I spend my time aside from my work either in the gym, watching movies, or gaming.”
“Burning up in a fire.”
“[Being] one of those 60-year-olds on Grindr still looking for a quickie.” (Another commenter responded: “Guys are guys at any age. Horny is horny. Do you think a guy at 60 stops having sex? Ha, no. In fact, he is more experienced and knowledgeable on sex and can likely outlast you and me! You will be 60 hopefully and still having a quickie. I hope I will!”)
“Republicans.”
Covid Hermit
Covid, HIV, dogs (I was attacked by a dog as a 2 year old; at 43, I’m still not over it), dying in an airplane crash (unlikely b/c I may never travel again due to Covid), dentists (because of any number of bad experiences from childhood to more recent times).
still_onthemark
I got Covid early in the pandemic (before vaccines), it was awful! But when the vaccines became available I got them + boosters and now hardly think about it anymore. As long as you get vaxxed, any Covid case will be mild. You even named yourself Covid Hermit; are you avoiding the vaccine for some reason?
MISTERJETT
rats and mice. i can’t even watch them on tv.
still_onthemark
This one is disturbing: “Emotional fear: being found out by my family/friends. I don’t think I’ll be in any real danger if my family and straight friends found out I was gay (even though I do have friends who are civilized homophobes), but they sure as hell would not be happy with me.”
This guy must be a Southerner, they’re so weird. (Probably votes R too!)
Dude, your family & friends already speculate that you’re gay. Unless you have a ‘beard’ (fake girlfriend) or unless you talk a lot about your supposed sexual interest in women, they talk about your probably being gay. What will you do when you’re in your thirties/forties and you’re still a ‘confirmed bachelor’?
thebaddestbabby
Why on earth would Russia attack Sweden, let alone attempt to take it over? Is there a sizeable ethnically Russian population in Sweden? According to the internet, no: just over 30,000 Russians in Sweden, a country of some 10+ million people. Also, there are plenty of violent homophobes in Sweden, altho it is far more tolerant as a country than Russia (but also Ukraine). Concocting scenarios of persecution that will never happen.
I say this because this website keeps having the ads to crowdfund missiles for the Ukrainian army to use. It’s not like the US hasn’t given them billions already. That war needs to be ended ASAP by diplomatic means, and that will mean ceding parts of Ukraine to Russia. Zelensky has probably always known this, as has the US government. Stop using gay rights issues to foment war. The more missiles sent to Ukraine, the more death.
LeBlevsez
Putin couldn’t care less about the Russian speaking population in Ukraine. He wants mineral and agro assets and Odessa. It’s all about real estate. As long as the population of Ukraine wants to fight for their country, we should help. The Russian speaking population in the east and particularly in Odessa identify more and more as Ukrainian as the war goes on.
Respect for Queer people in Ukraine seems to be improving as the war continues because everyone is fighting together. That doesn’t mean gay rights is being used to foment war.
Cam
What a shock, the right wing troll account tries to attack Sweden, one of the most pro LGBTQ contries in the world, and defend Russia one of the countries where we can be arrested and even killed without repercussions.
Your trolling, is sad and weak.
RickHeathen
That either I will continue to live in misery as the world stands
Or
that things will improve, the hammer will fall, and I won’t get to share in it.
fireball dude
I only have one real fear: getting my knees scraped/skinned. I’m pretty tough played sports, but damn can’t stand that sting in my knee!
Seth
I fear nothing beyond society being drug back into the caves by both the abject cruelty and prideful ignorance of the Right and the apathetic cowardice of the Center that empowers and enables that cruelty and ignorance.
I fear those that cannot or care not to recognize the difference between infringement and inconvenience.
JJinAus
“Dying alone”. Being in a relationship until the end still means you have 50% chance of dying alone.
Terrycloth
Nobody hears me..I mean they act like they listen but don’t really. The older I get the less important I feel…I am to me..everybody is too busy with their phones , their lives nobody stops to look around lost in their own bubble