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The gays are trying to WHAT? Here’s what went down—and who died—in ‘The White Lotus: Sicily’ finale

By · 15 comments · Updated on January 26, 2024
Theo James and Will Sharpe in 'The White Lotus: Sicily'
Image Credit: ‘The White Lotus: Sicily,’ HBO

Mamma mia! Mike White and HBO’s Italian vacation has been a trip to remember, but it’s all been building to this shocking crescendo. If you ask us, The White Lotus: Sicily really did stick the landing—even if we can’t say the same for all of its characters… *wink, wink*

Spoilers ahead for the episode seven, “Arrivederci.”

We’ve known from the jump that this season would result in an untimely end for multiple guests, giving the finale an air of tension that would be unbearable if we weren’t having so much fun watching along. Things were so brilliantly plotted that it really did feel like anyone could bite it.

Everyone suspected our dear Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) was in danger, girl—well, everyone except for Tanya and her fashion-challenged assistant Portia (Haley Lu Richardson). Those gays have been up to something sinister the whole time, but the poor multi-millionaire couldn’t manage to put the pieces together before it was too late. She even went back to look at the old photo of Quentin (Tom Hollander) with her husband, Greg (Jon Gries), only to think, “Hey that guy looks an awful lot like my husband!” (We are left to wonder if Quentin and Greg actually had a thing, or perhaps the latter was just stringing the former along on his scheme because he knew he was hopelessly in love with him.)

Paolo Camilli, Tom Hollander, Bruno Gouery, and Francesco Zecca in 'The White Lotus: Sicily'
Image Credit: ‘The White Lotus: Sicily,’ HBO

Portia’s Essex dream-boy, Jack (Leo Woodall), fully became a nightmare, and it was only after she was able to sneak a call to Tanya that she realized she was—as they say—”dickmatized” to the point of letting her boss walk into a death trap. She even worked up the courage to confront Jack about bonking Quentin, who it seems… really might have been…. his uncle?

Meanwhile, things reached a boiling point for (three-fourths of) our vacationing couples Harper and Ethan (Aubrey Plaza, Will Sharpe) and Daphne and Cam (Meghann Fahy, Theo James). Harper admits to Ethan that Cam kissed her, which sets him off on a rage, tracking down his former college bud and duking it out in the ocean. If you’d been picking up on some homoerotic tension between these two, this isn’t exactly what you had in mind when you said you wanted them to “go to town on each other,” but it was kind of hot in its own way, right? We can’t stop thinking about the way that wet shirt hugged Ethan’s muscles!

Ethan later tells Daphne—who’s been living in her own happy bubble and thriving—about their partners’ dalliance, and the two presumably go off to bone on that secluded island. Things are certainly awkward when the couples see each other at dinner, but then Ethan and Harper head up to their room and absolutely tear into each other (this time in a sexy way), and it’s honestly a relief to see. Everyone should also say thank you to Mike White for that shot of the upper quadrant of Will Sharpe’s butt!

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As for the DiGrasso men, well, grandpa’s (F. Murray Abraham) back to his usual horndog self, and Albie (Adam DiMarco) is convinced he is a hero to all women, asking his dad (Michael Imperioli) for 50,000 euros so he can get Lucia (Simona Tabasco) out of a tight spot. The thing is, he was totally getting squeezed, and Lucia’s gone before he wakes up in the morning. Poor, sweet Albie—come to us, we’ll hold you!

And who can forget our dear, queer hotel manager Valentina (Sabrina Impacciatore) who has seemingly turned over a new leaf after her night with Mia (Beatrice Grannò). She gives the aspiring singer the piano gig, and is eager to hit the town to meet some sexy singles who don’t work at the hotel. We know Mike White loves to pull the rug out from under his audience, so we almost can’t believe Valentina got a happy ending after all. Gay rights!

Who dies in The White Lotus: Sicily?

Well, as heavily implied above, it was none other that Tanya, the tragic heroine of her own Italian opera—but not before taking a few gays down with her! After that call from Portia, she becomes frantic, doing whatever she can to not take that little dinghy back to shore with that big dinghy, a.k.a. mafia-connected Niccoló (Stefano Gianino).

Coolidge has been incredible all season, but what she gives in these scenes is just an absolute master class. Her barely veiled snooping around the yacht is comedy gold, and her pleas for help to the boat captain? Those are destined to go down in meme history.

After locking herself in a bedroom, Tanya finds rope, duct tape, and a gun in Niccoló’s bag! The jig is officially up. Fearing for her life, Tanya blasts her way out of the room, offing her Italian Stallion, Quentin, and one of his friends in the process. Again, Coolidge is just killing it here, really selling Tanya’s terror and desperation, while still nailing the humor (“Is Greg having an affair?” Oh, Tanya, you still don’t fully get it, do you?).

In a panic, she tries to leap from the yacht to the motor boat, missing by a hair and bonking her beautiful head. She’s a goner. The next morning, her body floats close to shore, only to be discovered by Daphne, thus bringing this glorious season full circle.

Where will The White Lotus go for Season 3?

You might think that, because the season is over, that would mean the end of The White Lotus fan theories for now. But you’d be wrong!

With a third season already guaranteed, fans are wondering where Mike White wants to vacation next will be taking his dark satire next. Well, in a new interview with Variety, the showrunner reveals he has an intriguing idea for season three:

“The first season kind of highlighted money, and then the second season is sex,” White shares. “I think the third season would be maybe a satirical and funny look at death and Eastern religion and spirituality. It feels like it could be a rich tapestry to do another round at White Lotus.”

In conversation with Deadline,White previously expressed his interest in taking the show to Asia—and specifically mentioned Japan—so that idea certainly tracks. There’s also the fact that, in the finale, Daphne suggests the two couple vacation in the Maldives next year. Does the South Asian island country have a White Lotus location, too?

The assumption is that the show will carry at least one Sicily character over into season 3, just like it followed Tanya. Given her fate, it seems pretty unlikely Coolidge will return, although she’s such an obvious fan favorite, and White did say the following in that Deadline interview from back in October:

“Jennifer is my friend and everybody loved her in the first season, and I was like, ‘I can’t go to Italy without Jennifer,’” he says. “And maybe that’s still the case. Like, maybe you can’t go to Japan without Jennifer, either. There are so many fun actors we’ve worked with so far, so it’s just kind of like who’s available.”

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So maybe it’s a prequel? Taking us back before she was sleeping with the fishes, and back before she went to spread her mother’s ashes in Hawaii? (Okay, now we’re just getting excited thinking about who could play Tanya’s mother!)

If that’s not the case, our money’s on another trip with Daphne and Cam for season three. Those two have such a fascinating dynamic, so we imagine there’s plenty more to explore with them. Plus, Fahy was such an undeniable breakout of Sicily, and as long as James packs that prosthetic….

Feel free to share your hopes and dreams in the comments below, and read on for some of our favorite Twitter reactions to the finale of The White Lotus: Sicily:

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