As many of us grapple with the hallucinogenically dismal prospect of a Donald Trump presidency, our increasingly fallible brains chaff against a grim reality that’s too much to bear… and thus splash giddily into the shallowest pools of escapism available.
Related: PHOTOS: Internet Responds To Soul Crushing Election Results In Humorous Ways
Case in point: This interminable roundup of celebrity squawkings culled from Twitter.
Related: The Next Four Years Are Going To Be Awful. How Awful Is Anyone’s Guess.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Join us as we check in with the likes of Cher, George Takei, Lady Gaga, and Andy Cohen as they reel from the horrible news in 140 characters or less. Chuckle to yourself, and then begin to cry, and then perhaps try to stand up but collapse to the floor and hit your head on the coffee table, and then there’s probably some light vomiting and additional guttural sobs.
world will never be the same. I feel Sad for the young.?will never be more than the toilet, I’ve used as a symbol 4 Him.
U Can’t Polish ?— Cher (@cher) November 9, 2016
I am in tears
— Ariana Grande (@ArianaGrande) November 9, 2016
The unthinkable happened before, to my family in WWII. We got thru it. We held each other close. We kept our dignity and held to our ideals.
— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) November 9, 2016
A true American Horror Story
— Cheyenne Jackson (@cheyennejackson) November 9, 2016
This is an embarrassing night for America. We've let a hatemonger lead our great nation. We've let a bully set our course. I'm devastated.
— Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans) November 9, 2016
It looks like he won an Emmy and has all his writers & producers with him… this is a dream
— Debra Messing (@DebraMessing) November 9, 2016
I still believe in us. Despite this evident, great divide. It's time to come together. Hear each other. Not give up, cry, or gloat. Unite.
— Sophia Bush (@SophiaBush) November 9, 2016
Gather your strength. Now we must turn our tears to sweat, do battle with hate, and turn this chaos into progress. The great work begins.
— Dustin Lance Black (@DLanceBlack) November 9, 2016
No one can stop you from being a loving, kind, generous person. No matter who wins we will be okay and find our way back to humanity.
— Mark Duplass (@MarkDuplass) November 9, 2016
He said there were gonna be sooo many jobs. And he is gonna beat the hell out of Isis and be friends with Putin. He is gonna be so busy!
— Judd Apatow (@JuddApatow) November 9, 2016
I want to quit life.
— Rashida Jones (@iamrashidajones) November 9, 2016
Hold your loved ones close tonight. Let 'em feel it. Get some sleep. Back at it tomorrow. Love has a longer wick than hate & fear.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) November 9, 2016
Did we just elect a snake oil salesman and his wicked court of terror, or is my ambien kicking in? Or both? ??
— Andy Cohen (@Andy) November 9, 2016
Some didn't like Bush. Some didn't like Obama. But this is different. Forget dislike. Many are genuinely fearful now. This is new.
— Seth MacFarlane (@SethMacFarlane) November 9, 2016
I'm taking tonight to grieve for minorities, women, immigrants, muslims & the LGBTQ community but tomorrow I'm waking up ready to fight.
— Jesse Tyler Ferguson (@jessetyler) November 9, 2016
How do we explain this to future generations of women? And minorities?#weshouldbeashamedofourselves
— Will Arnett™ (@arnettwill) November 9, 2016
WE WILL NEVER BE SILENCED. https://t.co/Co4CYBXg8j
— KATY PERRY (@katyperry) November 9, 2016
What about Dreamers? Muslims? refugees? affordable health care? affordable college? voting rights? minimum wage? climate change? —
— mia farrow (@MiaFarrow) November 9, 2016
America just elected a man who said to "grab em by the pussy" over the first female president. This is really sad.
— Keegan Allen (@KeeganAllen) November 9, 2016
My heart is pounding out of my chest. This has to be a bad dream.
— Ansel Elgort (@AnselElgort) November 9, 2016
I truly hope that people keep their eyes open as we, the greatest democracy on the planet, crumbles. Maybe next time they'll choose better.
— Chaz Bono (@ChazBono) November 9, 2016
ErikO
Only people who were shocked are the Dimwits who thought the Hag was capable of 1) telling the truth and 2) has the capability of running a country. Heck, Hillary couldn’t even thank her supporters for all their help last night. These celebrities are talking out of their asses and know nothing about politics or world history, and just want attention.
Transiteer
Trump brings FEAR, with reason to be fearful. The Republicans platform enshrines all this hate. More discrimination laws in favour of discrimination. America ended last night, and a nightmare began. Stay safe.
joeyty
George Takei…major drama queen in need of attention.
joeyty
@Transiteer: You’re another drama queen.
ErikO
Donald Trump being elected President is in no way comparable to what happened to Japanese, German, and Italian Americans during WW II.
Alistair Wiseman
George Takei, your internment was done by a Democratic president. Moral idiot.
strix1
Let’s revisit this topic and reminisce in 3½ years…TBC…
joeyty
@Alistair Wiseman: You should see some of the statements from formerly smug bloggy gay ghetto reactionaries. Michael Signorile is shrieking how they’re “not gonna take those results! they’re gonna fight!” Fight about what, dope ? You lost. John Aravosis of Americablog is screaming the Russians did it. They’re comparing it to Kristallnacht! Huh?? And Fat Joe Jervis is just stuffing his face, no doubt. Andrew Towle is trying to blame misogyny, whatever. They’re all melting down completely. I’d feel bad (like I do for the decent Hillary supporters) but these bloggers are such evil people that it’s hard not to enjoy it a bit.
Alistair Wiseman
@joeyty:
There are all kinds of sad, pathetic anti-Trump protests going on in cities across the country tonight.
What exactly do these precious little snowflakes hope to accomplish? Very sad.
joeyty
@Alistair Wiseman: I know. Talk about embarrassing.
desertguy
I’m sorry, but since when did the comments of celebrities have any bearing on anything other than movies, television shows, music or hawking adult diapers?
Obviously all the celebrity endorsements Hillary Clinton employed, did her a lot of good! Seems to me, Donald Trump did it all without a single guitar. I’m just saying…..
As “open” minded the LGBTQ community projects themselves to be, it is rather obvious that they are not. Remember when gays were screaming and fighting to be given a chance to be heard, accepted, and respected? Not that long ago…was it? I’m just saying…..
Let’s give Donald Trump the chance he deserves. Give the man a chance. I am sure we will all be pleseantly surprised! I’m just saying…..
Xzamilloh
A bit melodramatic, no? He’s not president yet… the least they can do is wait until he takes office and burns America to the ground before having a premature bitch fit.
joeyty
@desertguy: “Let’s give Donald Trump the chance he deserves. Give the man a chance. I am sure we will all be pleseantly surprised!” I hope so. But….the Queerty crowd and others won’t do that. The only thing they’ve got to hang onto now is insisting he’ll be a disaster with everything and waiting hopefully for that disaster to happen. Their conceit and desire to say “I told you so” is more important than a genuine good future for gay/lesbian youth.
Doug
@joeyty: Regardless of how Donald Trump performs as the next president, there’s no denying the fact that after reading your postings you’re obviously an arrogant little twit.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
You kapo queens really are the beta cucks your masters describe you as…you really get off on living up to that dontca! No, don’t fight back! LOL As if you even could! Enjoy your degenerate status.
stadacona
I’m glad these celebretards have exposed themselves so I, as a consumer, can make an informed choice to BOYCOTT them. Katy Perry can eat dog sh*t.
joeyty
@Doug: Hillary lost. Deal with it.
Kieran
Get ready Canada for a flood of America’s dumbest.
joeyty
@Kieran: LOL. Like Canada wants ’em.
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Of course they can’t fight back. Gays are terrified of Muslims.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@joeyty: No. YOU are terrified of Muslims, you fucking coward. I’d rather risk the extremely minute likelihood of being blown-up then WILLINGLY live on my knees as the price of my “protection. ” You fucking cuck.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
BTW you are one boring ass mothafucker and your trollgame is lame. And shut the fuck up about Northern fucking Ireland. We fucking know.
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: I’m senssibly afraid of them, in that I know they’re a danger, but I’ll still go after them. I won’t hide behind “respect for diversity” to get out of having to kick pork up their asses.
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Now go listen to Dappy and ignore your Rotherham rapes and 52 percent of your Muslim population wanting to make homosexuality illegal. The U.S. will never go your route, which is what’s driving you up the wall with envy.
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: LOL. Queerty says Northern Ireland is Catholic. And you’re the one dope from all the UK that even hangs out here.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
I’m not a nationalist or a patriot or an apologist of any kind so your lame attacks mean fuck all
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Where do you live in the UK ? What town ?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
LOL
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Okay..I’ll play I’m half-thick Mick
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Grooming me to be your next Giancarlo?
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: You BETTER hide you self-hating homophobic creep. Five a.m. and you’re hanging out on a fake gay U.S. site.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
You alone deserve the ass raping pence is gonna give you boy
joeyty
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: you’re never coming to the u.s. anyway
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@joeyty: good night. I’ll dream of you.
Alistair Wiseman
An awful lot of celebrities vowed to leave America for greener pastures if Trump was elected president.
As a fellow Angeleno, I live just a couple of miles from many of you spoiled, pampered, self-important nitwits.
Well, I want to offer my services in helping you pack. Alot of us are expecting you to keep your word and move to Canada as most of you professed. (Of course, a country with brown people is beneath you – R A C I S T!)
Billy Budd
The rednecks have won.
Billy Budd
Is joeyty a redneck or just insane?
Daniel-Reader
Some concerns are genuine such as the one that Trump’s war on all muslims will create fear in nuclear-powered muslim nations such as Pakistan who will let their weapons out to those who would misuse them against the USA. That would be horrific.
Prax07
Guess it’s time to add Trump to my prayers…pray his limo crashes, pray his plane crashes, pray his boat sinks…you get the gist of it.
joeyty
@Billy Budd: LOL. Why do you name yourself after a Melville character when you’re so dopey ? (Trump won. Grow up and deal with it).
joeyty
@Daniel-Reader: LOL.
joeyty
Here’s some good info on why we’re lucking out being rid of the Clintons. http://listverse.com/2016/09/23/10-dark-secrets-of-hillary-clinton/
Stilinski26
They are just mad because they won’t be invited for gala and dinners at the White house
jag4313
What’s done is done. We can’t change that. We must keep our heads held high and continue to fight for what we believe. #AlwaysWithHER
CaliKyle
@Billy Budd: Rednecks “won” insofar as they (white, small town or rural, high school education max) make up a significant percent of economically hurt and disposessed Americans. Here’s the thing: the RNC did not shiv their populist candidate in the back to forcibly install a Jeb Bush. They soon enough capitulated to the will of the people, swallowed their bitter pills and got behind Trump. The DNC, however, played dirty, rigged wherever they could and thumbed their noses at everyone who didnt line up like brainless robots behind their corrupt, entitled queen. Purge the DNC and the party of Clinton and her ilk. Let the revolution continue now that the witch is figuratively dead. Feel the Bern and fan the flames far and wide.
pisces-boi
I’m not a Hillary Clinton supporter but I’m very anti-trump so I hope someone shoots him in the chest.
pisces-boi
@Prax07: I agree with you on that
pisces-boi
@Kieran: so if someone doesn’t support you’re president that mean we’re dumb?
pisces-boi
@Alistair Wiseman: you should be happen they’re protesting and not planning the asshole death which is what I’m dreaming of .
Alistair Wiseman
@pisces-boi:
Do not fear grammar, it is your friend.
pisces-boi
@Alistair Wiseman: And don’t fear focusing on the topic.
pisces-boi
@Alistair Wiseman:
you should be happy they’re protesting and not planning the asshole death, which is what I’m hoping would happen.
James Hart
These “celebrities” are a bunch of losers!
James Hart
@Billy Budd: I know. Isn’t it great. Remember: Some of us are gay rednecks! 🙂
James Hart
@jag4313: “#AlwaysWithHER” The “her” that you’re referring to is a crook, liar, and an unindicted felon.
joeyty
@James Hart: Yup. They think “redneck” is an insult. Heck, I was born and raised in NYC, and I don’t look down on “rednecks.”
Alistair Wiseman
@pisces-boi:
I’m guessing – English as a second language?
Deviant
@Prax07: which religion you practice when you can pray for someone’s death? …let me guess…hmmmm…. it must be islam aka religion of peace.
pisces-boi
@Alistair Wiseman: And I guess insulting is easy for you to do instead of stay on topic