Happy Thanksgiving From Queerty

As you contemplate the gaping, stuffed cavity of your Thanksgiving turkey this year, remember to show gratitude for Lawrence v. Texas, the 2003 Supreme Court decision that ruled anti-sodomy laws unconstitutional. Sodomy is in the mind of the beholder; some use the word in reference to anal sex only, whether between hets or homos, while others consider nipple tweaking between men or tribadism between women to be included in the general, delightful category of sodomy.


Though YOU might be able to have gay sex with legal impunity before, during, and after your Thanksgiving meal, homosexual acts remain punishable by death in Afghanistan, Mauritania, Iran, Nigeria, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Sudan, the United Arab Emirates, and Yemen. In Bangladesh, Bhutan, Guyana, India, the Maldives, Nepal, Singapore, and Uganda, a quick blow job could get you life in prison. The food in the prisons in Nepal is said to be disgusting, so there’s another reason for you to give thanks over your meaty drumstick with its accompanying sweet potato balls.

If your bigoted great-great-aunt sneers at your giving thanks for Lawrence v. Texas, remind her that you have a constitutional right to wallow in “abominable and detestable crimes against nature,” as gay sex has been defined by oh so many religious loonies. Henry VIII, who had two of his wives killed for the sake of political expediency, introduced the Buggery Act of 1533; it was the first legislation against butt-f*&cking and made that activity punishable by hanging. After the first sodomite went to the public gallows, one bloke in the crowd asked another “Do you think he was well hung?”

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