You-Eat-Your-KidsThere’s a bizarre homophobic, possibly-racist situation unfolding in a school district election right now, and we may need your help to get to the bottom of it.

According to some news reports, there are rumors floating around the immigrant Chinese community in Burnaby, British Columbia that the schools are planning to inject kids with a serum to turn them gay. Obviously, there’s no such serum, and it’s bizarre and alarming that such a rumor could even exist.

But there’s another problematic layer to the whole situation: rumors being what they are, there’s pretty much zero documentation about where the rumors come from, who’s spreading them, and who believes them. Nobody can find any actual flyer, or any actual person, who is participating in the rumor. In other words, news of the rumors is itself a rumor.

So, are there some immigrant Chinese parents who really believe this crazy lie? Or is this some crazy lie that is being spread about the immigrant Chinese parents?

That’s where you, readers, can help. Do you speak or read Chinese? Can you help us try to track down a blog or forum where parents are actually discussing the gay-serum rumors? According to some news reports, the claim was repeated on “A Chinese language blog that was posted online on 30 October,” and we suspect that they’re talking about this one here, but we don’t know what it actually says or who wrote it, and Google translate is, well, not super-helpful:

5.45 to the “anti-bullying” for the package, in fact, to promote homosexuality and other novelty of knowledge, and as a superior way of life taught to all children.Those who do not agree who would be labeled “homophobic disease” label.

Uh huh.

The root of the conflict might be a nondiscrimination policy passed a few years ago. According to another rumor — and, like everything, this is unconfirmed — the “gay serum” claim is being spread by some anonymous person affiliated with a group either called Burnaby Parent’s Voice or Burnaby First Coalition. Confusing!

In the end, the main takeaway from this is that of course there is no gay serum. That would be redundant, because homosexuals can already make children gay my using telepathic brain powers.

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