Jamaica’s Own Terrorists: Lesbians

 Jamaica Gleaner

Jamaica has never been tolerant when it comes to gays. So it should be no surprise that one its so-called newspapers has printed an article about the troubling increase of the lesbian population in their schools. And watch out, these girls are dangerous.

The high school police blotter:

At least one instance, a girl had to fight off a lesbian schoolmate who made a presumptuous advance at her.

“(Another girl) was dancing with her friends when she was brazenly approached by a student from Holy Childhood High, who discretely whispered, “I like you” to her.

The student’s response?

“I felt like I was raped,” she said in anguish.

But our favorite part is this little gem, where the paper reveals that gays are pulling out of the “gays are recruiting our young people” card:

A senior official, who requested anonymity, told The Sunday Gleaner that the homosexual behaviour among the girls is spreading like a fungus. “The recruitment is heavy. Every time we get rid of a big batch we have to deal with the recruited ones,” the senior official told our news team.

We want to thank the Jamaica Gleaner for warning us about this potentially dangerous epidemic. Thanks to them we’re canceling our trip to the island country this summer and instead opting to vacation at a much safer place: Baghdad.

High school girls gone gay! [Jamaica Gleaner]

• But wait! There’s more from Jamaica! [How To Find A Mistress 101The Jamaica Observer]

• And on a more serious note, their top gay rights leader was murdered. We are so never going there again. [Washington Times]