Mike Pence is promising to enact a bold conservative agenda in the impossible chance he becomes president, beginning with repealing a piece of legislation that’s never actually been signed into law.
What a visionary!
Seven non-viable Republican candidates took the stage Wednesday at the Ronald Reagan library for their second debate, and all of them came across as lightweights. Nikki Haley and Tim Scott argued about curtains; Ron “Don’t Say Gay” DeSantis smiled awkwardly; Doug Burgum tried to talk.
But nobody appeared smaller than the former vice president, who’s currently polling at 6%. At one point, Pence promised he would be repeal the Green New Deal, the lofty catch-all climate resolution that Democrats proposed in 2019.
That sounds like a nice plan… except for the fact it’s never even passed a single chamber of Congress.
Could Pence really be that clueless? Os he just trying to play the GOP base, who he thinks are that clueless? Maybe both? Regardless, neither answer is flattering.
AOC somehow got it passed and signed??? Damn!!
— Isiah (@forevertawl) September 28, 2023
It’s been an arduous campaign for Pence, one of the few politicians who holds the unique distinction of being loathed by the left and right. Democrats don’t like him for his arch-conservatism and anti-LGBTQ+ stances, and Republicans don’t like him because he didn’t throw the election for Donald Trump.
It also doesn’t help that Pence comes across as a Heritage Foundation cyborg. He’s tried to counter that narrative multiple times, such as when he posed for a staged photo op inside an empty Dunkin’ Donuts, or when he pretended to pump gas into a big red pickup truck.
Shockingly, neither stunt worked! These days, Pence can be found spouting Reagan-era talking points to virtually nobody in Iowa.
On Wednesday, Pence decided to try his stand-up routine in front of a national audience, and didn’t nary a single laugh from his fellow right-wingers.
Even his line about banging a teacher didn’t land! (By the way, does Mother know about this salacious behavior?!)
“My wife, uh, isn’t a member of the teachers’ union, but I’ve got to admit, I’ve been sleeping with a teacher for 38 years,” Pence stammered to a stunned audience.
Ew.
Mike Pence: “My wife isn’t a member of the teachers union, but I’ve got to admit I’ve been sleeping with a teacher for 38 years. Full disclosure.” pic.twitter.com/Ab4xNiyM3B
— The Recount (@therecount) September 28, 2023
By far the most uncomfortable someone has ever been telling a sex joke.
— ⚾️CPA⚾️ ❎ (@MrMet_CPA) September 28, 2023
Ugh, did Mother approve this joke?
— E Perkins 🎃🏳️🌈 (@Epers) September 28, 2023
He literally means sleeping, y’all.
— Mir (Read a book, not ban a book) (@Mir_SCS) September 28, 2023
Fully clothed, in separate beds in the same room.
In terms of G-rated material, Pence quipped about sending Joe Biden from the picket line to “unemployment line,” and said he was in Congress for 12 years… though “it felt a lot longer.”
Get it?! Because being in the government is awful! Now, vote this man for president!!
This is painful. Not even courtesy laughs.
— Maude Wallace (@aforbush) September 28, 2023
Cringe
— Scottie Hudson (@ScotterGa) September 28, 2023
Per usual, Pence paired his cringeworthy one-liners with malevolent policy proposals. When asked about the violence perpetrated against transgender Americans, the anti-LGBTQ+ candidate vowed to ban gender-affirming surgery.
(Sadly, that wasn’t even the most vicious attack on transgender people Wednesday night. Windbag 9/11 Truther/entrepreneur Vivek Ramaswamy called “transgenderism” a “mental health disorder.”)
For what it’s worth, I think he meant to say for minors, but this is serious enough to report verbatim in case my subjective interpretation is incorrect.
— Ari Drennen (@AriDrennen) September 28, 2023
And this was in response to a question about rising hate crimes against LGBT people!!
— naomi (@andletmejustsay) September 28, 2023
The perfect encapsulation of Pence’s repellent political package came when he was asked whether the Affordable Care Act is here to stay. Instead of answering the question, he bizarrely went on a tangent about how all mass shooters should be given the death penalty.
He’s empty, awkward and barbaric. The triple crown.
For those wondering, Pence’s encore performance will probably come during the third GOP debate November 8. Until then, we’ll see him at the bottom of the polls!
FreddieW
He’s scrupulously honest, and he has proven his loyalty to the Constitution. But he’s a conservative Christian, so let’s all call him names.
Kangol2
He’s also a liar and a rabid homophobe and transphobe, who enabled every single thing Don the Con did for four years, including disastrously leading the Covid-19 Task Force, but you keep defending this horrible, hateful man, a “conservative Christian.”
barryaksarben
lol NO he is not conservative in any sense of the word, he is a radical extremist. HE is an extremist fake christian without an empathetic bone in his body. He like his old boss is here to PUNISH people not help people. And if he is a christian Im the Dali Lama. HE show no christian charity or love to anyone who he deems not worthy. ENOUGH of these judgmental religious ZEALOTS and what the F are you even doing here anoint none of us going to listen to a thing you say. Pathetic
barryaksarben
HE is NOT honest because no HONEST person would ever support trump even if he was their nominee.
WillParkinson
Scrupulously honest? I do not think that means what you think it means. If you dig a little on the interwebs, you’ll find many of his ‘mistruths’ cataloged for you.
Also, considering what he’s said about gay folk, I’m completely comfortable calling his conservative christain ass names.
dbmcvey
He’s also incredibly anti-gay, so really Fred, shut up.
ZzBomb
Wait a minute, you’re saying we can’t call a guy who worked for the Trump admin, one of the biggest name callers out there, names? Dude, I’m taking a page out of their book and telling you “f*ck your feelings” and you. Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it in return.
LumpyPillows
I’ll give him credit for having principals that he abides by, even if I disagree with some of them. Like George W. Bush, I think people like them do believe they are doing or did the best they could for the country. My issue with Pence is I disagree with most of his positions and do not trust him to hire the right advisors – something that killed Trump; whereas Biden has surrounded himself with very capable staff. I won’t make fun of Pence, but I will never vote for him. Is he better than Trump? Very much yes.
dbmcvey
Look, I’m fine with heterosexuals as long as they don’t force their filthy behavior in my face.
barryaksarben
they keep shoving it down our throats and rubbing it in our faces trying to deny us any of our equal rights guaranteed by the constitution
The real Bruce
Wednesday’s debate with candidates for the GOP (Greed Over Principles), was a waste of time and resources. Almost all of the questions (rather simple) went unanswered as they all side-stepped them to go off on their own little tangents. Mike Pence looked and sounded totally out of touch and out of date. DeSantis was really bad at trying to gain lost ground. And Mr. Rathersmarmey was trying to be cute with his “thank you for talking while I’m interrupting” bit. What a mess!! I wouldn’t even want any of them in any cabinet position. Mr. Reagan must be turning in his grave!
DeeAnnCA
Clowns to the left of me,
Jokers to the right…
And the Clown Car stumbles along.
LumpyPillows
Dee – the clown image is so very fitting for this crew.
abfab
More Cow Bell Dee Ann! xo
My2CentsWorth
The “christian charity or love” is not part of the conservative christian agenda.
My2CentsWorth
He is not scrupulously honest!!!!! He defended Trump until Trump revealed that he would consider it OK if Pence was killed. Not once, as VP, did he ever call out Trump for being such a horrible person that lied and did horrible things.
ScottOnEarth
That debate was an historic joke and waste of time. I’m not surprised that those seven nitwits are the best the GOP has to offer (aside from their chief clown, who’s too scared to attend a debate), but, even for the messy GOP, they were absolutely ridiculous. Of course Pence knows that the Green New Deal never passed go but, as all republicans, he is pandering to the ignorant base who reacts to conjecture and idiocy, rather than facts.
LumpyPillows
I used to pride myself in watching the GOP debates to hear what they say. Sometimes they are right or have a good idea. Romney often had reasonable things to say, not that I voted for him, but I could have worked with him. With this crew of misfits, I can’t even be bothered to watch. While they may say something I will nod my head in agreement to, they will always follow it up with something so terrible that I can’t imagine how their brains work.
abfab
Mr. So and So, you have four seconds to respond……..
dbmcvey
This was a cat fight. Nothing of any importance was said.
decrans
When the vast majority of trans individuals suffer from mental illness, the left does itself no favors in failing to address or unravel the dichotomy.
Dr Sarah
When commenters think it OK to flat-out invent stuff to throw shade at trans people, no-one does anyone any favours by pretending that’s OK. Please do not make unreferenced inaccurate claims just to make a group look bad.
decrans
In the past decade, a small but growing body of literature has shed light on the subject of psychiatric illness within the transgender community. The literature suggests an increase in the rates of mood, personality, and psychotic disorders, suicide, as well as various forms of substance abuse, including misuse of tobacco, alcohol, and illicit substances.
decrans
That’s from the Annuals of epidemiology, Volume 39. Those are the facts on the table.
mailliw110
You must know that it takes AT LEAST TWO TEARS of psychology visits to even start to transition. Then another year of wearing the clothes. Then there is the visits to the cosmetologist to remove any unwanted hair. So, yeah, not an overnight decision.
decrans
Nope. There’s a thing called informed consent. There are Reddit threads dedicated to getting around gatekeeping. Try again.
Georgeiv2
I don’t know which turns my stomach most her having to sleep with him or him having to sleep with her .Thank the Lord they are past breeding age !
abfab
Where did the fly go?