The Oscars return to ABC this March 27, once again celebrating a year of film in which audiences have thankfully, for the most part, had the opportunity to return to the cinema. Variety reports that unlike the past few years, the Academy & telecast network ABC want the show to actually have a host this year. We chalk that up to last year’s somnambulistic, host-less ceremony which saw viewership dip to half the numbers of the year before.
Of course, the fact that nobody had been to a movie theater in a year may have also had something to do with it.
Related: Glenn Close’s “Da Butt” dance was the highlight of the Oscars. Was it all staged?
In any case, we hope ABC is reading this: we would like to submit five names to the hosting call. All are LGBTQ people, and all are very talented…enough so that we know they’d put on one Hell of a good show, and strike a blow for equality to boot.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Besides, think of the Power of the Dog jokes…
Bowen Yang
Also known as SNL‘s latest secret weapon, Mr. Yang has a penchant for making the absurd and awkward hilarious. Consider what the man who gave us his “Titanic Iceberg” sketch would gift us in a year celebrating House of Gucci, Dune, and The Tragedy of Macbeth. C’mon, can’t you just picture him as a giant sandworm complaining about colonial invasion? Besides, if there’s anything more absurd or awkward than some Hollywood stars’ “cosmetic enhancements” we haven’t seen it.
Gina Yashere
Ms. Yashere doesn’t get the credit she deserves as a cackle-worthy comedienne. For anyone doubting us, please YouTube her stand-up. We can certainly picture her throwing together a routine lampooning Olivia Colman’s bizarre behavior in The Lost Daughter. Seriously, who steals a doll?
Alexandra Billings
A grand dame of the stage, Ms. Billings has a reputation as a powerful actress and as a woman unafraid to speak her mind. We wouldn’t have it any other way. In fact, we know she’d have thoughts on everything from Dave Chappelle to RuPaul’s antipathy towards Spider-Man, which could lead to some magnificent zingers of the Ricky Gervais variety. Not sure what we mean? Check out Gervais’ comments to Mel Gibson at the Golden Globes a few years back. Hey, you wanted a show…
Dan Levy
Since his retirement from Schitt’s Creek, Mr. Levy hasn’t had a proper on-screen outing. In short, we miss him, and as a child of Hollywood, we know he would have some very unique perspectives on Hollywood’s biggest night. For that matter, we could see the entire show as a Schitt’s Creek reunion of sorts, with Moira Rose, Alexis, David and Johnny all popping up to share anecdotes about their experiences with some of Tinseltown’s biggest stars. What would David Rose have to say about Kevin Spacey? We ask you that.
Jonathan Groff
When in doubt, an old-fashioned song-and-dance man (Bob Hope, Sammy Davis, Jr., Hugh Jackman) can go along way toward bolstering the evening’s entertainment value. Given Mr. Groff’s recent athleticism and villainy in The Matrix Resurrections, not to mention his own experience on stage, we submit him as the best candidate to do a medley of the past year’s many musicals, as well as banter with nervous stars in the crowd. Now, about Dear Evan Hansen…
JTinToronto
Oh God! Anybody BUT Dan Levy!!!!!
Paulie P
as i was scrolling i said the same thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bye david.
Jer
So is Neil Patrick Harris not gay enough, or is he considered too old?
I’ve seen several of his emcee runs, and the worst is better than most’s best.
Joshooeerr
At this crucial stage in Oscar history they really shouldn’t be experimenting with untried hosts. They badly need Neil Patrick Harris or Whoopi.
Paulie P
Oh no to either of those… NPH takes himself too seriously and Whoopi can barely get across the stage at the View and the wheezing and glasses are into pretty of Oscar night.
Out of those choices and none should do it, Boen would at least keep it moving and light and comical.
cuteguy
The last time NPH hosted he came out in his underwear in one segment, bc apparently he needs attention to his mysterious “abs”. Anyone but NPH. Yuck
BoomerMyles
How about Mr. Billy Porter?
scotty
i’m all in on jon groff…he actually looks identical to my actual, real first gay BF who told me “what’s the point of having a gay BF if you wont let him redecorate your house?” ahhh jeremy you were one of the best hope youre well.
inbama
What’s all this Daniel Levi hate?
Pair him with Wanda Sykes.
JTinToronto
How about Wanda Sykes on her own. She doesn’t need Dan Levy bringing her down to his level.
bsg1967
Ricky Gervais unleaded is always more entertaining than the self absorbed awards
Jim
OMG. Is this the best the gay community has to offer for this gig.
SAD
IvanPH
Yang, Yashere, Billings?
Lmao. Hardly anyone knows them. The Academy will not get a host who can’t draw a crowd. It’s all about the ratings.
Essie
If the Academy wants to “draw a crowd” with someone with name recognition, the ONLY name on this list would be Dan Levy, even with all the hate from the mean girl little queers on here. However, hosting the Oscars is a no-win situation for anyone so Levy probably wouldn’t consider doing it.
Mostlikelytobedownvoted
Give the gig to RuPaul. B*tch’s been playing the part of a nice person on tv for decades and the fools eat it up.
Sister Bertha Bedderthanyu
Kids, once upon a time hosting the Oscars was a job Hollywood stars fought over. Now they are practically ridiculed for doing so. I think Jabouki(?) White would be a good choice.