Soon, you’ll be able to buy some skimpy boxer-briefs featuring an unflattering caricature of Donald Trump. While it’s not altogether certain what wearing them says about you or will accomplish in the grand scheme of things… hooray?
We’ll admit: It’s difficult to imagine wearing these will win you big points with your sexual partner or — awkward — your primary-care physician. And honestly, we’re not altogether sure how we’d feel about an image of Trump rubbing up against our crotch all day. But probably not great?
The masterminds behind the underwear have unveiled a Kickstarter campaign, and a pair can be yours for $25. (For $1,875, you can purchase 100 pairs and they’ll “send a tweet to @realDonaldTrump.”)
They describe the product as featuring “a fat buffoon yelling into the abyss, holding a megaphone in his teeny-tiny hands. ‘Blah blah blah blah blah’ is written all over.”
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Related: Donald Trump erupts on Twitter after scathing review of namesake restaurant
They also note that the horizontal fly allows you to slide your member out of the area shaped like Trump’s mouth, which is faintly terrifying and we need to sit down. But if you’ve ever imagined Donald Trump opening his mouth only to have your penis flop out, well, you’re in luck. You’re also pretty gross.
Related: Is There A Shady Secret Message On TIME’s Donald Trump Cover?
Here’s why they decided the world needed a pair of Trump-flavored boxer-briefs:
The election left us stunned, like most Americans, and the horror of reality set in shortly thereafter. We are still in shock. Presumably, so are many others who care about equal rights and justice for all, whether they are Black, White, Asian, Muslim, Mexican, part of the LGBTQ+ community or other. With our moods mired knowing the positive progress has been halted, we wanted to create a pair….
Throughout the campaign, the founders will make personal donations to the causes listed below — the causes that the incoming administration should be for, but is against. You are welcome to let us know which projects you care about the most. Please note that no funds raised on Kickstarter will go towards charitable organizations as per Kickstarter policy (disclaimer). The founders however will make personal donations to these causes on behalf of Mr. Donald Trump, Mike Pence and Paul Ryan, and send donation certificates to their respective offices. Plus, we’ll tweet @realDonaldTrump with each $5 and above pledge.
The men behind the campaign will be donating to Planned Parenthood, the Trevor Project for LGBTQ Youth, Refugee Assistance Project, NAACP Legal Defense and Education, and the Southern Poverty Law Center.
Okay, so maybe we’ll buy a few pairs after all.
scotshot
I would prefer a large American Bald Eagle on the front of the briefs so my Johnson feels patriotic all day, while on the rear Trump’s mouth right over the hole’s location saying “Here’s something big for you America” (sorry if I grossed anyone out).
The possibilities are endless.
XzamilIoh
You Trump haters really trusted Killary to run this country?
dwes09
@XzamilIoh: “You Trump haters really trusted Killary to run this country?”
Clearly you are not paying any attention to what he says, and who he is appointing. Clearly you are not able to understand the writings of economists, scientists, sociologists, psychologists and others regarding him and the consequences of his actions. The lack of critical thinking and intellect in this country is sad indeed.
Her name is Hillary, you have swallowed (as so many dullards have) the cool aid fed to you by the right for the past 30 years (so probably from your mother’s teat if you are as young as you look). I wish I had some reason for optimism regarding the things that will be wrought by this man over the next two to four years, but I don’t. He does not understand the constitution, he does not have any ethics or empathy. He is petulant, self absorbed and thin skinned. I don’t hate him. I look at him objectively based on what he has actually said and actually done over his career, you clearly are not capable of doing that. You, on the other hand cannot separate reality from wishful thinking and the pablum you have been fed. Good luck with that!
Jack Meoff
Sounds like more opportunists just making money off the situation.
dwes09
@Jack Meoff: “Sounds like more opportunists just making money off the situation.”
Opportunism is one of the cornerstones of commerce. Always has been, always will be.
Sluggo2007
@dwes09: You have to take into context his feelings. His people are all PO’ed because Hillary lost and they all think that their self-entitlement liberties under Obama will soon be gone, and you know what? They’re correct!!!