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Shawn Mendes goes topless, ‘Real Housewives’ tea & Jacob Elordi’s bathwater: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week

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Three-panel image. In the left panel, a lit white candle sits on a black table with a label reading "Jacob Elordi's Bath Water" in thick, black capital letters. In the middle panel, Shawn Mendes stands doing the surf's up hand sign, smirking with his eyes closed. He stands shirtless with wet brushed hair holding a surfboard in front of a sunset. In the right panel, a Black man with curly hair and a light beard smiles. He wears a brown, purple, green, and light blue paisley swirled puffer jacket, zipped up to his neck.

Take a deep breath, because we’ve nearly survived the first week of 2024.

The holiday hangovers have finally worn off, the workplace PTO has run out, and if you’re anything like me, you’ve changed your New Year’s resolutions at least three times. It’s safe to say the world has returned to a state of normalcy.

It’s certainly the case for this week in LGBTQ+ news, as we learned Sam Smith is back on the prowl, Jonathan Bennett is hitting Broadway, and a new Ryan Murphy show is on the horizon.

Our favorite season (“Awards!”) is coming up, so naturally Golden Globe winner Jeremy Allen White is our new Calvin Klein crush. On top of that, this poor woman went TikTok-viral asking why Sniffies is sending men to her door.

Is this going to be the year we’ve been waiting for? The jury is out. But as you trot to the gym, try to ditch sugar, or attempt to crack a book, worry not. For us, it’s new year, same obsessions –– from social media crazes, to heterosexual mess, and of course, cute boys.

Here are the 10 things we’re obsessed with this week…

1. Gay Agenda Notebook

Two-panel image. In the left panel, a faded green hardcover notebook sits on a wooden table surrounded by vintage-looking bulb lights. The notebook reads "Confidential" in faded letters, with the words "Gay Agenda" printed in a fading pink typeset in the middle. In the right panel, the same book sits on top of a stack of other books on a sunlit white wooded floor.
Image Credit: Etsy

I live and die by my old-school, hard-copy, no-batteries-required planner… and not just because I refuse to learn how to sync my iPhone calendar to “The Cloud.” There’s something to be said for the tactility of physically writing down thoughts, appointments, and lists. Plus, I have stereotypically gay and perfect penmanship.

The New Year provides the perfect opportunity to snag a new notebook or planner, so you can get inspired to write your Saltburn fan fiction novel, stay organized, or just doodle. I recommend this vintage-looking option (available in hardcover and spiral bound for $15.99 on Etsy), which guarantees no confusion about the agenda you’re spreading.

2. Gold Stainless Steel Cocktail Shaker with Confetti Design

Two-panel image. In the left panel, a translucent cocktail shaker filled with rainbow confetti sits in front of a white background. It has a gold, stainless steel topper. In the right panel, the same shaker sits on a decorative golden table surrounded by other party decorations with pink labels, reading things like "Birthday Babe" and "Sippin' Pretty."
Image Credit: Walmart

Nothing sparkles like glitter, but it’s a certified pain to clean up. That’s why I’m obsessed with this little cocktail shaker –– $45.50 at Walmart –– that sets the party vibe with zero chance of finding confetti in your underwear the next day. (Stranger things have happened.)

The gold stainless steel shaker is perfectly sealed, stylish, and makes a darn good dirty martini. Be warned: you may become so obsessed with cocktail making that you’ll never touch another hard seltzer again.

3. How intense these girlies are getting over Stanley Cups

@mk_b11 #fyp #stanleycup #stanley #viral #target #targetmusthaves @Stanley 1913 ♬ Everybody – Nicki Minaj

There’s no denying the TikTok-documented firefighting powers of Stanley Cups. And as an accidental water bottle hoarder, I can appreciate the value of a double-wall insulated liquid container –– even one that looks like it’s got a car handle affixed to its side.

But the cult-like obsession over Stanleys (whose 20oz to 64oz sizes go for $30 – $60 at Target) is getting ridiculous, albeit extremely entertaining. Fans are lining up ahead of store openings, sprinting and brawling over new releases, and even ritualistically preserving its original packaging. I think people need to go outside more, but I must be hypnotized too, because it’s the only thing I want to talk about.

4. Jacob Elordi’s Bath Water Candle

Two-panel image. in the left panel, a white lit candle sits on a black tabletop. Its label, affixed on a glass container, reads "Jacob Elordi's bath water" in thick, bold, black lettering. In the right panel, a 'Saltburn' scene featuring Barry Keoghan, with strong biceps in a white tanktop and pajama pants, standing in a dark standalone bathtub about to crouch down. There's a yellow rubber duck on the tub's edge and the background is dark.
Image Credit: Etsy / Amazon MGM Studios

If you’ve seen Saltburn, you’ll recall EXACTLY which scene this hilarious candle is referring to. (For the uninitiated, all you need to know is Aussie hunk Jacob Elordi takes a bath and Barry Keoghan, uh, helps him clean the drain.)

If morbid curiosity –– or unfettered horniness –– is getting the best of you, worry not. This 100% natural soy wax candle ($33 on Etsy) may not have the same taste as “Jacob Elordi’s Bath Water,” but you can let your olfactory senses run wild with scents like clean cotton, apple harvest, cinnamon vanilla, white sage and lavender, or sea salt and orchid.

That Gay Guy Candle Company also has their version for $27 and it comes in over 15 scents including leather, unscented, lemon pound cake, and lush linen.

5. This gay couple who was married by Kelly Clarkson at a concert

If you could see the (happy) tears “Behind These Hazel Eyes” right now! During the New Year’s Eve show of her Vegas residency, Kelly Clarkson served as a witness for a gay couple in the audience who brought their officiant and sought the singer out to be a part of their big day. The men were pronounced husbands “by the power of Kelly Clarkson’s show” surrounded by a cheering crowd.

Furthermore, their love for Kelly is no joke. They reportedly spent their first date discussing her music and got engaged during her 2019 tour. The whole story just warms my pop-star-loving gay heart.

6. Shawn Mendes feeling “grateful grateful grateful”

Shawn Mendes celebrated the New Year with some sunset-hued pics on the beach. Clothes not included. As he wrote on Instagram: “Pura Vida!!!! Happy New year!! I’m so looking forward to this year! grateful grateful grateful.”

The singer has been candid about working on his mental health over the past year and his return to music. But after these thirst traps, I honestly I feel like I’m the one who’s grateful.

7. Houston White Adult Paisley Puffer Jacket

Two-panel image. In the left panel, a Black man with curly hair and a light beard smiles. He wears a brown, purple, green, and light blue paisley swirled puffer jacket, zipped up to his neck. He has his left hand in his front pocket and his right hangs by his side. He wears green, loose pants. In the right frame, he is pictured from the back to show off the paisley design.
Image Credit: Target

I never knew how much I needed a paisley puffer… until I got a paisley puffer. When it comes to winter weather, I tend to go for warmth over aesthetic. But this jacket I scored from an aimless Target trip (currently on sale for $51) has got me saying things like “Yeah, it’s a statement piece” in 30-degree weather.

Not only that, but it’s made of corduroy with a zip-and-snap close and the biggest pockets known to retail department store shoppers. I know it looks like a big swing, but even the heteros are complimenting me on it.

8. This piping hot Real Housewives of Salt Lake City tea

There’s no mess like straight mess. By no means do I devotedly watch Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, but I can’t help myself from basking in this drama-filled moment from its Season 4 finale.

On an overcast beach, Heather Gay reveals that the season’s newcomer Monica Garcia, who they’ve been “trying to champion, support, and defend,” is behind gossip Instagram account Reality Von Tease. The handle has been espousing disparaging comments about the women all season long, so naturally discourse and memes from the Bravo-obsessed gays have been inescapable. Honestly, maybe I do need to watch this franchise.

9. Rogue Paq Send Nudes Match Book Set

Two-panel image. In the left panel, a white matchbook is pictured on a red table next to a white candle. The matchbook is open, revealing the words "It's raining men" next to an umbrella illustration. Each match is colored to depict a muscular naked man, showing off their backsides. In the right panel, the same matchbook is pictured on a white tabletop.
Image Credit: Urban Outfitters

If it really was raining men, a single match would likely be of no help. But that doesn’t change the fact that this nudie match book set ($12 for a three-pack on Urban Outfitters) is adorable, and basically invented for the sole purpose of existing in a gay man’s bathroom next to a votive candle.

The set’s queer sensibility will appeal to your friends who pay attention to detail, hopefully keeping the place smelling clean. (And for those without matches in your bathroom, do a Google search and grow up!)

10. Malin + Goetz Eucalyptus Deodorant

Two-panel image. In the left panel, a white cylindrical container with a lid. The container reads "Malin+Goetz eucalyptus deodorant" in golden text, with indistinguishable lettering underneath. It's pictured in front of a green, fresh eucalyptus branch. In the right panel, the same canister is pictured in a grouping of four, with each tube's lid removed to reveal a clear deodorant substance.
Image Credit: Malin + Goetz

If you’re looking to make an easy change this year to benefit your skin (or uh, the environment), look no further than LGBTQ+-founded skincare company Malin+Goetz. Designed by two Chelsea gays with limited shelf space, the duo has created an expansive lineup of products on their mission to uncomplicate skincare.

My personal recommendation is the Eucalyptus Deodorant ($22 online), their best-seller for 13 years. Not only is eucalyptus a supreme scent, but its residue-free formula is designed for all skin types without a trace of aluminum, alcohol, or parabens. Your pits (or pit-loving friends) will thank you.

Related:

Prince Harry’s frozen todger, Nicole Kidman & Jake Shane’s gay TikTok chaos: 10 things we’re obsessed with this year

Prince Harry’s frozen todger, Nicole Kidman & Jake Shane’s gay TikTok chaos: 10 things we’re obsessed with this year

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