McKrae Game spent 20 years promoting “ex-gay” therapy and was once considered a leading voice in the conversion therapy movement as head of Hope For Wholeness, a homophobic hate group that claims to help people “discover a way out of homosexuality.”
That is until June of this year, when he came out as gay. Now, he says he’s disavowing his former organization and hopes to undo some of the damage he caused.
“Conversion therapy is not just a lie, but it’s very harmful because it’s false advertising,” he tells the Post and Courier in a new interview.
Related: Horrific gay conversion camps like this one are legal in states that’ve banned ex-gay therapy
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51-year-old Game, who now identifies himself as “former ministry leader know-it-all,” goes on to call the whole “ex-gay” thing “a lie” that has “harmed generations of people.”
“We’ve done wrong,” he says. “We need to admit our wrongs and do what we can do to stop the wrong from continuing to happen.”
“I was a religious zealot that hurt people. People said they attempted suicide over me and the things I said to them. People, I know, are in therapy because of me. Why would I want that to continue?”
In a Facebook post from last week, Game adds:
At one time I was working with so many youth that I had a weekly youth group, where they’d share why they were there, and I would guide them in how to not be gay. What a sad commentary of my past verses today, or a bad joke as many may see it. I believe all of these young men are now out/gay and one that I worked with for many years is married to a man and living in San Francisco. I hope to catch up with him. I believe I’ll message him today. Hopefully he’ll not be too angry with me. When the reporter asked me if I’d like to see Hope for Wholeness shut down, I said I’d like all exgay ministry and conversion therapy counselors and organizations shut down. I told him I believed the only positive and productive use for HFW and exgay ministry is for those that believe that homosexuality is incongruent with their faith, to receive and have a community of like minded people so that they can live healthy lives, and in the end that was what I was trying to do. Today, I’m thankful to have it all behind me.
20yrs in exgay ministry I WAS WRONG! Please forgive me! ??Unpacking the memories. In the discussions leading up to The…
Posted by McKrae Game on Sunday, August 25, 2019
“I want all ex-gay ministry dismantled,” Game tells the Post and Courier. “We have harmed generations of people.”
“I hope they just give me the chance to talk to them so I can hear them out and apologize.”
Related: America’s most notorious ex-gay center is still operating. Will it finally be stopped?
Donston
Fluidity has some legitimacy for some people. And the romantic, sexual, affection, emotional, relationship spectrum can be fairly complicated stuff. But this whole actively trying to “de-gay” yourself stuff seems to do nothing but make people hateful and loony.
GabrielKing1660
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Pter
GET RID OF THIS, PLEASE!
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September 4, 2019 at 4:09pm
calpoidog
All these programs based on religion, rather than science, are doomed to fail.
TomG
True, but some people still wish to believe in fairy tales which is their right. And whatever makes them feel good is fine by me, unless they try and push their views onto others.
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
Proof positive that these Gay conversion zealots are all deeply closeted self hating Gays. One has to accept his decision and apologies and hope he can now use his position to shut down those who peddle this abhorrent agenda..
Kangol2
He clearly never de-gayed or ex-gayed himself. Just absurd, and unfortunately for everyone else, so dangerous and destructive.
TomG
Some guy. They proved years ago that being gay is NOT a choice. You cannot change the way you were born.
Donston
Can people please stop saying this stuff? Spouting broad, incorrect things like this is partially what keeps the hate train alive. There have been many studies over the years. And most conclude that orientation and sense of gender have many determining factors. Physiological aspects are important factors for a decent percentage of “queer” people. But no study has found any “gay gene” or has determined that anybody is born on a particular spot in the orientation spectrum. So, pretty much everyone Is different for a lot of different reasons.
Chrisk
So what’s your point Donston? That being gay is a choice?
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
Donston: I had absolutely no choice on being BORN Say, nor my being on “any particular spot” on a scale. No Gay person I know points to a day they “decided” to be Gay. However you DID decide to be a noxious troll
There was never any iota of doubt in my mind since I had any concept of sexuality. You and your vile troll ilk feed the homophobia rampant in this country led by the current misadministration….
Take your abhorrent noxious troll arse and post elsewhere….
dinard38
Wow!!! The militant gays on this site loves to attack when someone has a different opinion that they have. Not everyone buys that “I was born this way” theory. I don’t buy it.
No one is born with a preset sexual preference. I believe it’s just a combination of experiences as we grow that shape our sexual preference. I grew up attracted to girls, even through my teenage years. But at the same time, I was being molested by an uncle for years, from the age of 7 to 13. I’d always pretend i was sleep. Pretty sure he knew I wasn’t, but that was a coping mechanism. At seven I didn’t know what the heck he was doing. But at 12, hormones starts to kick in, and now…..well….it kind of felt good. And so my sexual preference trajectory was altered. Now I understand that not everyone that’s gay was molested, but there could have been other experiences growing up that shaped their sexual preference.
But the “Born This Way” mantra? Nah. Don’t buy it.
Donston
My point is there is a lot of variety when it comes to the gender, sexuality, romantic, relationship spectrum. What makes people believe there’s not as much nuance and variety when it comes to the development of these things? Sometimes folks push problematic agendas or factoids when it’s wholly unnecessary.
Chrisk
dinard38
So you were into girls before the age of 7. Then your Uncle molested you and you just decided yep. I like guys. Get real.
Donston
A lot of folks feel being a victim of sexual abuse or assault has at least something to do with their overall psychology and also where they are on the gender, romantic, sexual, affection, relationship spectrum. It’s not really our place to tell them they’re wrong. Just because some feel that way doesn’t automatically mean they’re full of self-resentment or internalized homophobia.
dinard38
@ChrisK I am real. Who the f*uck are you to tell me about my experiences and how it affected me? Also, I didn’t say that I liked girls until I was seven and then suddenly switched to boys when I was molested. I have no recollection of liking girls or boys at the age of 7. My point was that I was unwillingly exposed to sex with a man during years where our sexual preference and behavior start to take shape….and by that I mean ages 12-13…..not 7. And that exposure shifted my sexual preference.
This notion that “I was born this way” is a defense mechanism we created to combat those that say it’s a choice. If we say we were born this way, then we shouldn’t be discriminated against for something we were born with. The fact is that there is zero scientific proof that people are born gay. It’s environmental factors that shape our sexual preference. And THAT’S OK!!! Why can’t we just accept that and move on?
Donston
dinard38, now you’re being extreme. Inherent heterosexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality, pan-sexuality, tree-sexuality, whatever are not choices. There are plenty of people who have little to no romantic or sexual feelings or relationship comfort/fulfillment towards certain genders/sexes. That is not a choice. And they should not be shamed for that. Homo shaming is starting to become a regular thing in the “queer community”. And it makes me uncomfortable. I do feel like the dependence on identity and trying to “prove” the existence of orientations have led to an unfortunate wormhole where people are fighting for things that aren’t worth fighting for or pushing problematic agendas. We are not in control of our orientation circumstances. However, there are choices and decisions within those circumstances. Coming out/being out is a choice. Embracing whatever identity you embrace (if you embrace an identity) is a choice. Who you sexually engage with is a choice. Who you have relationships with is a choice. The point isn’t about identity or trying to “prove” something to people but to try to grasp why you see yourself the way you do and why you do the things you do. That’s why I emphasize the romantic, sexual, affection, emotion and relationship spectrum, why I emphasize self-comfort and emphasize mental health over identity or sex. You can’t say there’s no type of choices to any of this. That just leads to even more internalized homophobia, resentment, manipulation.
As much as people want to make “gay” mean “being born 100% homosexual and staying that way”, in real life (aka off the internet) I’ve had in-depth conversations with merely a couple of gay-identifying who are truly homosexual, feels like they’ve been entirely homosexual throughout their whole life and legit feels that they were “born gay”. So, clearly identity, fluidity, the spectrum, lifestyle are much more complicated for a lot of folks than many give it credit. But those types of nuances broaches territory that make a lot of folks uncomfortable. It’s never been as simple as “born this way” or “it’s a choice”.
Jerry
Good for you but what about all the lives you probably destroyed.
Chrisk
Yeah, especially the 18 yo that went home right after their talk and killed himself.
irbaboon
Some things can not and should not be forgiven
mykelb
These people will never take personal responsibility for destroying lives. They are pure evil.