Cher, the most fabulous liar on Earth, embarked on her “final” farewell tour in 2002. It was a historic moment in which gay men from all over the world (and a few straight women, probably) gobbled up tickets to lay claim to being “one of the lucky ones” in the audience for Cher’s last time on stage.
Thankfully, the incomparable 67-year-old entertainer was bluffing. She kicked off the North American leg of her 49-date “Dressed to Kill” tour last night in Phoenix (this one will be the last, she says). It was awesome.
This graceful diva may have been wearing things that “didn’t fit right,” and admittedly “couldn’t remember the words to two of her songs,” but she reportedly rocked the sold-out house with hits from her career spanning five decades better than most infant pop divas today ever will.
“If I fall on my ass, my shoes are slippery tonight. It’s not me,” she said. “It’s not drugs or drinking, as everybody on Twitter accuses me of… I’m kind of amazed anyone showed up. I thought, ‘Jesus Christ, they’re out there. What are they? Crazy?'”
Iconic. Timeless. Cher.
Head on over to Billboard for a full review.
“I know it’s cool to have a big ol’ ass booty. [Mine is] not that bad for my age. Kim Kardashian probably has a photo album of her ass.”
“Think Lady Gaga has safety pins on her dress? I don’t think so. Maybe just vomit. That was interesting.”