PROTEST TOO MUCH

Ted Cruz Riles Up All-Male Crowd With Talk Of Gay Sin. Where’s The Afterparty?

Screen Shot 2015-09-01 at 8.27.17 AMWe aren’t going to say that the all-male, all-white crowd behind (and assumedly in front of) Ted Cruz at the “We Stand With God” rally in South Carolina are confused about their own intimate desires, causing them to take a fear-based opposition to the wondrous fluidity that is human sexuality.

Actually, we are.

How else could you rationalize the powerful desire to congregate around an issue that *supposedly* has so very little to do with them?

Related: Turns Out Ted Cruz’s Father Rafael Is Just As Obsessed With Gay Sex As His Son

Regardless, Cruz took the opportunity to double-down on his “repeal gay marriage” nonsense:

“Let me tell you something,” he said. “Marriage existed long before the United States Supreme Court. Marriage existed long before the United States of America. Marriage was not ordained by any law in this country. Marriage was ordained by God Almighty, and Caesar has no jurisdiction over the pulpit.”

He called the Supreme Court’s Obergefell decision “fundamentally illegitimate” and “lawless,” and touted a bill he’s introduced that would allow states to ban same-sex marriage.

Then he tried to rally the people crazy enough to vote for him — the evangelical Christians — into getting out on election day, claiming 54 million of them stayed home on the last election.

Related: Candidates Share Longing Gaze Before Signing Batsh*t Crazy Pledge To Ban Gay Propaganda, End Gay Marriage

But you know the message was lost on at least a few of the thumb-resembling white guys behind Cruz who spent the whole afternoon trying not to check out the candidate’s stump.

Watch below:


h/t NCRM

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