Hollywood is home to some of the world’s finest bulges.
A bulge, not to be confused with VPL, is defined as the beautiful product yielded “when a male’s dick and balls bunch up in their pants to form a bulge-like form.” For those stubborn celebrities who’ll never pose in the nude, the bulge is the closest we’ll ever get to an authentic peen sighting.
But who has the best bulge in Hollywood, you ask?
Queerty is dedicated to finding that perfect celebrity bulge, but we can’t do it without your help! Vote below for the dude you think is packin’ the most precious bulge, and feel free to suggest even more impressive knockers in the comments below — there’s bound to be a second round of voting…
David Henrie, actor
Niall
Seriously don’t get what’s attractive about the outline of a flaccid penis in the cases of Jon Hamm and Michael Fassender. A boner or a semi sure, but a flaccid penis?
Caine
i know what cold water does to your dick – are you deliberately trying to show off Tom Daley’s lack of bulge?
Brian
@Niall: Michael Fassbender has shown his. Check out “Hunger” or “Shame.” It’s a nice one.
stanhope
Babe, Tom Daly doesn’t have a big one neither does Mario Lopez [almost missed it entirely]. Mehcad Brooks, Sam Callahan, and John Hamm are featuring the goods.
stanhope
@Caine: Dustin had bigger in that video with his ex
Alton
You’re just gonna say Tom Daley won anyway.
SpunkyBunks
Tom Daley will solve world hunger with his gay bulge.
coltonblack
Gotta love Grady Sizemore being on the list:)
ingyaom
Um… none of the above?
ethan_kho
Jon Hamm…. OMG! <3
Billy Budd
Michael Fassbender has a HUGE endowement and he has lots of animal magnetism. VERY attractive and sexy guy.
DarkZephyr
For those talking about Tom Daley, I don’t think the contest is about who has the largest bulge. And while I didn’t vote for Tom, I happen to think his bulge is pretty sexy. I think every guy up there has a nice one. Jon Hamm’s is the one that impresses me the most when it comes to size, but over all impressiveness for me goes to Michael Fassbender.
jckfmsincty
John Hamm: The Other White Meat
james_in_cambridge
I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m sick of hearing about Hamm and his bulge so I say Mehcad and Sizemore for the win! Wouldn’t they make a delicious couple? Now, I’m gonna go imagine them fighting it out to see who’s gonna top whom…maybe better yet, Mehcad and Sizemore decide they’ll top Henrie and go and get his hot, cute little butt.
I gotta go!
Desert Boy
@Niall: – Are you sure you’re queer? Maybe you’re just passing through.
sandi shader
If you want to talk about beautiful Hollywood bulges, ya gotta check out Adam Lambert’s!!! Beautiful bulge! 😉
Billy Budd
Please guys, watch SHAME the movie, look at Michael Fassbender’s penis, and then tell me if you would be able to take it or deep-throat it. I bet you wouldn’t. It is massive. It is too much.
junjun
Can u tell me who is looking for partner?i am waiting
Bopper1
…who cares…
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
@Caine: You are kinda sorta missing the point, he is showing all that despite the shrinkage factor
Use any image search engine and you will see that Tom is quite blessed……
newecreator
I just looked at the poll results.
spovegasboy
Jon Hamm definitely should be listed as VPL and not in bulge list…
georgemed222
Size comparisons are fun – but up close and personal, overall penis health is also important. Lots of guys don’t pay enough attention to everyday health of the tool and need to use a first class penis health cream (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) in order to address dry organ skin, odor, etc.
junosoda
I guess there is another white privilege man that’s getting all teh attention.