Horny gays recall the dumb things they did just because a guy was hot

Turns out, lust makes fools of us all, too. On Reddit, gay guys have been ‘fessing up to the dumb things they’ve done just because a guy was good-looking.

“Earlier today, I ordered DoorDash, and I gave a pretty decent tip,” one dude wrote earlier this month, kicking off the conversation in the r/askgaybros subreddit. “But I saw the Dasher as he was delivering my food, and he was fine. Like, I would let that man doing unspeakable things to me type fine. So I added an extra $3 tip to my order just on the basis that he was attractive. He didn’t do anything special. I know this sounds ridiculous, but I was thinking with my dick, not my brain.”

Another user quipped: “Is this why my attractive husband has an almost-perfect rating on DoorDash and a lot of comments on his account, while my rating is only good and [I] have 0 comments?”

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Here are other shameful moments from the Reddit thread, edited for brevity and grammar:

“At a steakhouse, a dude was bussing tables, a 10/10 in tight Levis, a tight black shirt, huge guns. Classically handsome. My weakness. … As [my friends and I] were leaving, I told them I left something on the table went back, took out a 20, walked up to him, and said, ‘I used to bus tables; you should get tipped.’ He smiled and said thank you. Nothing else, but my fantasy ran wild after that when I went home, lol.”

“I called out of work for this hot guy I wanted to bang since high school. We were supposed to meet at my place where I’d take him to poundtown. Well, he showed up and we just… didn’t click. … I think I was weirdly nervous and couldn’t get to peak hardness. … We just awkwardly watched Tabitha’s Salon Takeover until he left, and I never heard from him again… Apparently, he was friends with my manager (I didn’t know that) and told her about our awkward hookup on the day I called out and showed her a picture of me… I told her I was sick that day… Long story short, she cut my hours ever since that day and I had to find a new job just to pay rent… all for some ass that I never even got…”

Related:

Gay Redditors share the hookup stories they’d never tell their closest friends

“I slept with an entire group/circle of friends at separate moments and occasions with each one.”

“Pretended to be a bottom … At the end of every time we hung out. I felt unfulfilled and in need of reciprocity. Made me realize I can top but not bottom, but I can’t bottom and not top. … But I learned how to be a better top from my experience with him. I learned that the bottoms need pleasure, too, and that they’re not just a hole for me to use then be done with them.”

“When I was in college, I was living in a cheap studio in a sketchy area. I worked part-time and requested no closing shifts because I didn’t want to get robbed or murdered. New guy gets hired and only works closing shifts. Total package with looks and personality. I’m in heat and end up switching to closing shifts so I could close with him. So yes, my lust is more powerful than my fear of getting murdered. Was only there for a year, but it was one of my favorite jobs, honestly.”

“Nearly signed up for a regular donation to a charity. Hot, blond, European guy going door to door, sweaty from the Aussie sun. I couldn’t resist. And then I lied and said I didn’t have a phone to sign up to get out of it.”

“I got out of a swimming pool one day, clearing my eyes, not looking where I was going, and bumped into a super hunk. I kinda deliberately fell sideways into the pool again. He was apologetic and then jumped in to see if I was OK. I mumbled something dopey with a swoon and a smile.”

“A door-to-door salesman for pest control showed up one day. He was beautiful and just my type. I was completely uninterested but listened through his whole spiel and got his number ‘just in case’ we decided to change companies. Texted him later, but he was not into guys, unfortunately.”

“While in a foreign country, I took a train from the city center to go to his small city nearby, then paid for public transport to traverse this small city to his house complex that was in a more or less remote place. Followed his orders to open the door, got all the way to his building, and finally met him at his apartment. This was all off of Grindr after exchanging two to five pics and texting in a language I don’t know well. … Don’t do this at home, kids. It was very stupid, and I was in a whore phase high.”

“The dumbest thing was probably getting drunk and sending a hot streamer a bunch of virtual gifts and donations on their TikTok Live. That’s a good quick way to burn a bunch of money. Ugh. Much shame on that one.”

“Redid an inventory check during an audit because I noticed a cute guy in the room and wanted to say hi, lol.”

“Helped him build a multi-billion dollar business empire, even though I could have taken another higher paying job. I mean, the cuddles after a long day were definitely appreciated, haha. He’s just the cutest.”

“If I’m into some dude online, I will tell him everything about my life, including secrets, and if I befriend some new dude at work or at a bar, I do the same. It’s like I can’t keep a secret about my perversions.”

“I once went shot for shot with this Russian guy at a bar because I was trying to impress him. Big mistake.”

“I got a tattoo.”

“Drove to his house in a snowstorm.”

“Married him.”

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Gays will brave the elements in order to take care of business!