Joy Behar has been widely criticized for her Thanksgiving message to viewers on The View. On Wednesday’s episode, the show’s hosts talked suitable topics of conversation around the Thanksgiving table.
Co-host Whoopi Goldberg said people should avoid talking about politics, but Behar, 79, jumped in and said she enjoyed conversations about difficult subject matters at Thanksgiving. That’s when she added that people should use the opportunity to come out.
AVOIDING POLITICAL TALK THIS THANKSGIVING? The co-hosts discuss if politics is a topic that is better left off the table this #Thanksgiving and question if it will be a tricky conversation to avoid. https://t.co/cVclFZyKV0 pic.twitter.com/vd3CfcyzVH
— The View (@TheView) November 25, 2021
“Everybody out there, come out to your family this Thanksgiving,” Behar said. “Just come out!”
Goldberg, seeking clarification, responded, “Come out … the door?”
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“No, come out gay,” responded Behar.
She then went on to say that life is short and people should strive to be their authentic selves. She added, “Come out, be yourself. Don’t let anybody tell you what you have to be in this life.”
Related: Meghan McCain didn’t just trash her old ‘View’ cohosts–she hated these guests, too
Although few would disagree with her latter statement about the importance of being one’s authentic self, some were left unimpressed about Behar blithely telling people to come out over the holidays and “see what happens”.
Sure, the fear of other people’s reactions may be worse than the reality, but many people still sadly face a bad reception from loved ones. Most people think coming out is something one should do only when ready.
Many thought Behar’s comments tone-deaf and ill-judged.
She’s gonna get so many people disowned this week 😭☠️
— shania twink (@shania_twink) November 24, 2021
I couldn’t tell if she was encouraging people or threatening them.
— Twerk-Bajir (@JoePGould) November 24, 2021
“See what happens 🤨” lmaooo the homeless rate finna skyrocket. Why she so dark sided ??
— ♡ ♡ ♡ (@bxxchie) November 25, 2021
This show is Garbage…..
Joy Behar encourages People to
“Come out” while with your family for Thanksgiving 🤦 This can be Some of the worst advice someone can give— Stripes&Mane (@ManeStripes) November 26, 2021
“See what happens”
— Medusa (@lusamedusa) November 24, 2021
Oh phew. Now that I have Joy’s blessing, I think I’m ready to come out.
— 🦦Zad Efron (@Sharpurr1) November 25, 2021
No. No. No.
She downplays how serious coming out is for people.
You come out at your own time. Not because a straight woman on TV tells you to.
— sneakerlife (@sneaker13130144) November 26, 2021
Joy Behar changed the trajectory of so many thanksgiving dinners this year and she is fully aware…
pic.twitter.com/XvR2zqqZXL— JushForFans (@jush_for_fun) November 25, 2021
Behar has previously been praised for her coverage of LGBTQ issues. In 2010, GLAAD gave her an Excellence in Media award for her “fair and accurate” coverage of the community on her CNN show, ‘The Joy Behar Show.’
Related: Nobody is more outraged by Joy Behar’s homophobic joke than homophobic Republicans
However, she can occasionally dropped the ball.
Earlier this year she was criticized when she made a joke about NFL player Carl Nassib coming out as gay. A discussion on Nassib included some football terms Behar was unfamiliar with, leading her to quip, “After they said penetration in the end zone, they lost me!”
She later apologized for the remark.
dhmonarch89
I remember out gay comic Bob Smith telling his coming out story- it was at Thanksgiving… the whole family is there- good place to get it over with. Half the posts you see these days from gay people seem to encourage people staying in and fighting for their right to do so. So much for progress.
Bo Hamrk
I knew my family loved me unconditionally. I told myself I would reveal myself after my father passed. I came out to my Mother, younger Brother and Sister over the phone and guess what? They already knew and were waiting for ME to confirm. We are closer now and I even came out to my bible Brother via Christmas Card. Me and my partner are going on 25 years together and even our neighbors are happy for us. Life IS too short but, everyone has to decide WHEN it is comfortable and have backup plans if they sense they will be shunned. I see Joys’ View. Whoopi is a great moderator too
Gianni862
So agree…
And to think I thought she was as being supportive
dhmonarch89
Bo- it would be a lot easier if the people who said they knew all along came to you and said they knew. It’d be nice if str8 people helped us out once in a while.
Jake123
Imagine getting annoyed about what she said. People seriously have to get a grip.
Bo Hamrk
Yes, everyone has an opinion but some just nit pick at others views. Maybe it makes ‘them’ feel better about ‘themselves?’ Too many have their panties tied up in a mess and strangling their brain[s] See what happens? Get OVER it. 15 seconds of fame and there’s the hate coming
Bo Hamrk
Where and when does the bus going back to the 70’s embark? I need to get away [FAR, FAR away] from all this vile hatred and denigration of America
Bosch
Well I mean, if every non-hetero person was really honest with themselves about their sexuality, I think we’d find that heterosexuals are a minority.
Why else do so many homophobes experience sexuality as a “choice”?
Openminded
Bosch, I totally agree with your theory. Sadly, the old “Men must be manly” thing is still being shoved down every boys throat. No wonder so many young guys are tormented with their conflicting feelings.
Bosch
Also, if someone just loves you because they think you’re straight, then they don’t really love you. If you’re over 18 and out of the house, you have the opportunity to redefine your relationship with your family on your own terms.
Kangol2
I get Joy Behar’s point but she’s not taking into account that some people live in or may have family environments that are very unsafe, particularly around sexuality and coming out. So anyone advising people about coming out has to factor that into the equation, even in 2021.
Max
I think she knew about those dangerous places not to come out. she often is the one that brings up such details to her co-hosts. IMHO, her statement was just too “fresh” from her mind and blurted without afterthought, which was the mistake.
I think she should have said try to be more understanding and accepting of everyone at Thanksgiving and leave it at that.
Ken A.
She means well so why is she getting flack for saying what others always say. If you’re in the closet you do the gay community a disservice or something like that. She didn’t say anything bad. The terminally offended needs to shut up.
Bosch
Because thanks to the internet, the dumbest 10% of every group are also the loudest.
missvamp
My cousin came out at a family Thanksgiving when I was a teen. Our family was 100% cool. But not all families are like mine. It’s not ok to spout shit like this.
Bosch
If someone thinks it’s a dangerous idea in their family, then joy behar is not going to change their mind.
But if someone is just struggling with the courage, this could be just what they need to hear.
She’s not spouting “shit”, and be careful about turning on our allies.
Openminded
Missvamp, Let me first say that I don’t really care for Joy Bahar and her “better than thou” attitude. That said, I think her heart and her intentions were in the right place with her statements. As Bosch stated, I don’t think she said enough to push someone into coming out unless they were already at the very edge of that cliff. If I had to critique her statement, it would be that it came a little too late. Maybe saying this a week ago would have gotten more of the “on the fence” kids to think about it and determine it just might be a good time to come out. I liken it to the usual Thanksgiving day bits where they are telling you how to cook a turkey. If it’s already Thanksgiving, it’s too late to learn you should have thawed the turkey 2- days ago. Personally, I’d rather hear messages from those who have already come out explaining how important it is that everyone does it at their own right time, even if that time never comes.
twomen4u
Here I have to straddle the fence. The holidays are a good time to come out to your family but only you know if it is the right time. I grew up in a household where the word “sex” was never spoken and I got my education as most boys in the locker room at school but it was only one sided – straight. It wasn’t until the age of 40 that I had to be true to my inner self and stop being what family and society wanted me to be. It meant losing three children whom I adored and still do though at a distance. I am now a GGP but will never see that child and he will grow up not knowing me as his mother did. So you have to know when is your time. It took years and just as my dad was beginning to see a difference in me, he suddenly passed away. My mom got to know my late husband and my current husband and he was as good to her as he could be. Mom was not one to show emotion but I could tell she loved the little things he would do for her. So do not wait too long as time might not be on your side.
AZ71
OMG. This is ridiculous. She was just making a comment as a joke. But she has a point. If you’re an adult and living on your own then you should come out. She obviously wasn’t suggesting anyone come out if it puts them in harms way or if they’re a child living under the same house as a homophobic or dangerous family. Geez people.
ScottOnEarth
Joy is a HUGE supporter of the gay community. If you’re offended by what said, then your fragility must make life difficult for you, in general.
KyleMichelSullivan
I had a friend who was encouraged to come out during Christmas. (Not by me but another guy we knew.) His father beat him so badly, he lost the sight in one eye.
I’ve known others who were kicked out into the street.
But yeah, Joy…and all those who support her…let’s just “see what happens.”
barryaksarben
WAAAY too many people stay in the closet way too long. YOu should know if your dad is a violent homophobe then no dont come out but if you suspect they know and have known for years bite the damned bullet
Consider This
“After they said penetration in the end zone, they lost me!”
Now THAT is funny (and most enjoyable).
Fahd
I like Joy – her book on Trump was very funny – and I get that she’s as aware as anyone that life is short, but I hope she isn’t losing her filter.
MrMichaelJ
I wish I could “come out” EVERY SINGLE TIME I have to sit there and listen to some guy talk to me about chicks. WTF? Look, I’m 50 but just 2 nights ago some 20 something guy asked me where all the “ho’s” are at. My God, did I ever just want to bust out with “I wouldn’t know” or the other week when we had a huge all girl pro-surfer contest and one of the guys I know was going on about how that was somehow a f’n bonus to the event. My God, do I wish I could just come out, be honest and be like turn the f8ck around and let me show you where it is at.
But once that door is open you can never close it.
winemaker
This is the view and this coming from joyless behar the know it all yenta, no surprise here! After over 25 years are there any intelligent people who waste an hour of valuable time and intelligence on this bitch fest, evidently so? Really when this show debuted some 25 years ago it was an interesting diversion. Host barbara walters brought a bit of civility to daytime talk show dysfunction like maury povich and jerry springer to name a couple. The original ladieswho conducted the show were polite and civil and welcomed guests with differing ‘views’,. They were polite and respectful even if they disagreed with the guests, something the current hags hosting this ultra liberal bitch fest where only ultra liberal opinions are allowed lack. Over the years it has gone off the deep end and is nothing more than a bunch of old hens on the rag bitching and kvetching about nothing of interest to most people. Who in their right mind continues to watch this waste of time other than having the tv on for noise while doing housework?
Cam
Sweetie, if you’re going to troll under multiple screenames you shouldn’t recycle the same insults under all of them.
Doesn’t matter the topic, if there is a liberal woman you’re there attacking her with some boring nickname, and you’ve used Joyless about 500 times.
Your troll game, no matter what screename you’re under is sad and weak. Quick now, switch to one of your other names like @Miss Terri, @openminded, @jayceecook, @Caddy4J, @Hank31, etc. to call me some name. LOL!
barryaksarben
you are so obvious it smells. NOt a single mention of the hate filled vicious ugly mean spirited right wing assholes that have lowered every aspect of our society but sure complain about Joy who is only trying to help. GO AWAY TROLL
Toofie
Her meaning was in the right place. Yes, if there’s danger or you will be kicked out of your home, then don’t. But if you’re coming home for the holiday and have to tiptoe around people as to not reveal your truth, why bother going?
Bruno070
Joy Behar has a platform. People listen to her. This is why she must be careful of what she says. In this case the nonsense she spouted. Thought you were better than this Joy.
dario717
Don’t be overly sensitive, Bruno.
Paulie P
nothing wrong with what she said.. the “culture” these days will blow literally anything out of the water.
ThinkPIease
We are supposed to take advice from Joy Behar who thinks it’s ok to dress-up in black face? No one should be forced to come out. This is one of the reasons why we have a LBGT youth homeless problem. If you are a teenager living with parents that have no friends or coworkers from the LGBT community that may not accept you. Wait until you are financially independent from your parents. When your parent(s) are ready to accept you they will ask you. If you have a parent that refuses to accept you, remember this could be a shock and eventually they will come around. If they refuse to accept you, then you are better off with out them in your life.
If they try to convince you, “the Bible says it’s wrong.” Remember, there is a lot of f*cked up shit in the Bible that would never be acceptable today.
tjack47
She’s been an LGBT ally longer than many of you have been alive. Did some of you ever consider she was trying to give encouragement? I don’t understand all this being offended. Did you pee your diaper? Geez!
DuMaurier
I guess I’m not outraged because I assumed the unspoken part of Behar’s message was so obvious; i.e., “Of course, you know your family and I don’t. So maybe hold off on the coming out thing if you have reason to believe you’ll be tossed out on the street, subjected to forcible exorcism, or dragged onto the front lawn and stoned to death as an offering to Jehovah.”
But then, I don’t need every little thing spelled out for me by a stranger offering general advice, and I don’t parse every word in a statement by a public figure looking for things to be self-righteously indignant about.
dario717
Yes, come out on your own time and not because someone else tells you to; however, I wish these overly sensitive idiots would get over themselves. Jerks in your family are going to stop having anything to do with you no matter when you come out. Better to do it sooner rather than later, I say. This whining about nothing is the result of helicopter parents from the late 90’s on not letting their kids ever solve a problem on their own.
KellyRobinsonJr
She has a point… Thanksgiving has always been a popular day to tell your family that you’re gay. My family is 50/50 Democrat and Republican and 100% Christian and a few Karens tossed in. Our Thanksgiving arguments are always “festive”. I was lucky, In my personal coming out story, for every family member that frowned upon my coming out and ignores that I am alive to this day, I gained a stronger, long-lasting, and loving relationship with other family members. Fast forward 35 years later, the last words that my father said to me on the day that he died was “Tell Ron that I love him”… My dad died on Nov 29, 6 years ago today. To me, it was worth coming out, just to hear those words from my father. Most recently, a few of my cousin’s children have come out, and without the shame and terror that I felt by coming out. I say, Go for it!
DarkZephyr
I think people are making this bigger than it needs to be. She probably didn’t mean for vulnerable or underage people to do it. She probably meant adults in stable situations. She didn’t say anything that Harvey Milk wasn’t saying back in the 1970s. Coming out was essential to the furthering of LGBT rights in the United States.