Despite all the hubbub around the missionary position in Red, White & Royal Blue—yes, straights, we gays do it, too!—the charming queer rom-com is actually pretty tame when it comes to sex and nudity.
Oh, sure, there’s talk of hard-ons and allusions to blowjobs (remember Alex and Henry’s first hook-up scene when the movie inconspicuously cuts to a shot of the highly phallic Washington Monument?), but outside of the aforementioned face-to-face bottoming moment, the movie’s rather chaste considering its R-rating.
However, we do get a couple fleeting glimpses of bare bum, with Taylor Zakhar Perez’s Alex showing off his plump posterior when White House Chief Of Staff Zahra (Sarah Shahi) hilariously stumbles in on the First Son and Prince Henry (Nicholas Galitzine) after another night together.
Look, we don’t know why we’re reminding you—we’re sure you remember. The tush was tush-ing! But it happens just before the scene below:
Once you get past that perfect curvature of those cheeks, you may notice something we don’t often see in movies, gay or otherwise: *ss hair! Yes, Zakhar Perez went au naturale and showed off his hirsute heinie, a small but notable decision that queer viewers are commending—and otter-lovers are particularly pleased with.
But it almost didn’t happen—Zakhar Perez apparently debated shaving before his big rump reveal in the film. It took Red, White & Royal Blue writer/director Matthew López stepping in to encourage him to let the hair stay.
Everybody say: Thank you, Matthew López!
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This juicy bit of behind-the-scenes goodness comes from SiriusXM’s The Jess Cagle Show, where López chats with EW‘s Patrick Gomez all about bringing his star’s hot bods to the screen and his embrace of “the reality of body hair.”
Much like the very deliberate conversations that were had about Alex and Henry’s “moment of insertion,” the filmmaker reveals they had a talk about whether or not to go full smooth-booty.
“I go into Taylor’s trailer,” López shares, “we’ve been making this movie for like, five, six weeks at this point—and [hair & makeup designer Karen Hartley] looks at Taylor and says, ‘Alright, tell him what you told me.’ And he goes, ‘I don’t know if I should shave or not.’ I’m like, ‘Your face?’ and he goes, ‘No, babe.'”
Hm… what could he be talking about then?
“I’m like, ‘Alright, well, what do you want to do about it?,'” the director continues. “He goes, ‘Just look, okay?’ So, I had my hair and makeup person there as the chaperone—because I didn’t want my career to end before it began, and Taylor, like, lowers his pants and he’s like, ‘Look at my ass,’ and I’m like, ‘You’re fine, you look great!'”
Oh, to be a fly on the wall of that trailer!
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The haters said it was impossible.
It’s a hilarious anecdote—one López clearly took great joy in sharing—but, seriously, it is nice to see a big, shiny, LGBTQ+ film that doesn’t just pretend all queer men are born with naturally smooth bottoms, you know?
And it was all by design, speaking to the importance of having queer filmmakers like López around to depict queer stories and lives. It shouldn’t be surprising to see hair on an *ss in a movie, but it is!
“Look, I do understand—it’s called Hollywood,” López continues. “What I don’t personally understand is why we can’t change that definition of what is beautiful. And, hardly anybody’s going to argue that these two young men aren’t beautiful, but a body, itself, as it is naturally is a gorgeous thing.”
“So, yeah, I told Taylor: ‘Please, bring your hairy butt to set!'”
Amen to that! When we talk about a need for a greater diversity of representation on screen, we’re of course including representation for butts on all points along the smooth-to-furry spectrum.
And Taylor, by all means: Bring your hairy butt wherever you’d like!
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bachy
Face and body hair is a secondary sex characteristic in men. It’s what signals masculinity. Removing it seems oddly prudish, regressive.
peluzo
Maaaaaanscaping
mailliw110
Shaving head hair, ok. Shaving body hair, not ok. Got it!
skapellas
Taylor’s hairy legs were also yummy.
4Rjunior
Yes I loved his hairy legs. ?????
peluzo
GOD BLESS YOU TAYLOR ZAKHAR PEREZ
you and your tush-ing tush!
MrGoldman
My god this movie was so dumb! Sure, the actors are cute as hell, but it is so poorly written and absurd, I can’t believe it has such a big budget.
Jack
Then you’re really going to be surprised to know that it drove MILLIONS of new subscribers to Prime Video. Hell ya it had a big budget. It’s a mega hit. No offense to your feelings about the movie at all,
though. 76% positive critic reviews and 94% positive audience reviews on Rotten Tomatoes. The vast majority just loved the movie.
Raphael
It’s a rom-com, what did you expect!? It’s no “dumber” or different from any straight big budget rom-com.
mailliw110
I don’t know. Airplane was pretty stupid, too. Your standards may be a little too high.
smittoons
I don’t actually think it had a huge budget. It has only two or three established actors in supporting roles (with Stephen Fry really just being a cameo), and the rest of the cast is up and comers and unknowns. Filming looked like it was done entirely in the UK with some second unit establishing shots to fake Texas, DC and France, along with tons of iffy greenscreen. The UK likely gave the production a tax incentive too.
As for the quality – making a good rom com is difficult since by nature the genre requires real suspension of disbelief. There are a number of great ones from the Golden Era of Hollywood, and I’d fight anyone who comes for Nora Ephron’s Meg Ryan trilogy, but most of the time what we get is this sort of Hallmark-level storytelling. And honestly I’m often okay with that, as I’ve already accepted these people aren’t in a really believable situation to begin with.
abfab
Oh god I miss Nora.
Lovebug69
Oh Pooh on you Ms Gold
bachy
That “Hallmark” style is a big cash cow. People love it because it’s escapist.
Jack
Clearly Taylor hasn’t seen a hairy butt. I didn’t even notice, I was too busy looking at how effing perfect it was. (Not sure Matthew Lopez should be telling this story on air, tho. Kinda private)
Darson
No to butt shaving but yes to waxing his chest? I knew the hairy arms and legs meant he should have been hairier elsewhere. The contrast of hairy chested Alex next to smooth Henry would have been so sexy.
woodroad34
Yes…that was weird. Not sure why they shaved his chest.
Claytonisahobo
I tried watching this tonight and had to shut it off. To much like those Hallmark movies that I hate.
lmdoane55
didn’t any of y’all see MINX on STARZ? if you haven’t I suggest you do! xoxo
Just.my.opinion
Like most men, Mr. Perez does have hair on his butt. However, he does not have a hairy butt. I have a hairy butt!
Pietro D
“A {male} body, as it is, is a beautiful thing as says the non-hairy actor. Taylor Zakhar Perez”s hairy ass & legs are gorgeous……. very much like my BF. Taylor is beautiful! I’m smooth, muscled and totally non-hairy and I love the contrast of a hairy and non-hairy couple in whatever situation foemost in bed rolling around in the hay, and for me, personally, that situation is especially exhileratingly & sexually something I would never alter. Ever!
YellowMarc
It’s a mediocre Hallmark-style movie, like one of those that play mid-afternoon on cable TV, but this time about a gay romance, so kudos for the queer representation. I had the fast forward button pressed hard to make it end quicker.
RickyK
The article mentions a “couple fleeting glimpses” of bare bum, but I only remember the one with Taylor that is referenced. Do we see the other guy’s bum? If so, I missed it.
woodroad34
I’m kind of surprised there hasn’t been any hysterics about the “I’m biiiiiisexual” and Harry’s comeback: “I’m not exactly ‘gay as a maypole'” lines–why were they even necessary?
inbama
Like “Heartstopper,” it was written by a woman and it shows.
Worse yet, aside from the cake crash, where was the comedy? The boys were pretty, but there was not a single comical or memorable character in the entire film.
Hallmark? It was more like an “after school special.”
MSM
I have not seen the film. But I have thinking about paying for prime video to do so. I weighed the comments here, pros and cons and have decided. EH. not going to bother. Hallmark Christmas movies raises my sugar levels. I get the feeling this one would too. But suggestion….make a Christmas version for Hallmark, that is where this one belongs. Title it Red White and Blue Jingle Balls, but i guess Bells would pass the censors, Balls wont.