• Jim McGreevey successfully stole the thunder from former beard, Dina Mato McGreevey's Oprah appearance. The Gay American "is entering a seminary amid reports that he wants to become an Episcopal priest," according to NYC's NBC affiliate, WNBC. IHT confirms that the formerly - and publicly - Catholic New Jersey governor has been embraced by the Episcopal Church. With this successful entry, McGreevey's plunging into the "discernment" phase, says IHT . This process which clears the pipes for deeper spiritual penetration and eventual priesthood. After all is said and done, McGreevey could looking at over three years on his knees for god. Dina best come out with a sequel. [Image source]

• Last week, The Advocate broke the story on Micron Technology's board of director's heavy-handed refusal to endorse a shareholder sponsored non-discrimination policy. Now the Boise, Idaho company has reversed it's position. From The Advocate:

Micron Technology Inc. decided Tuesday to amend its company policy so employees can no longer be fired on the basis of their sexual orientation. The move comes after The Advocate revealed last week that the Boise, Idaho, company’s board of directors had ignored an unprecedented 55% shareholder vote in favor of adding both sexual orientation and gender identity to its nondiscrimination policies.

Well done, homo-journos! Unfortunately, the board will not be including gender identity in their revised policy. Divide and conquer, huh?

• Don't forget all the homo-politicos. Referring to a string of recent political gains, Denis Dison of the Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund tells Deb Price: "We have seen in the last month at almost every major win, almost always there is an openly gay legislator behind that story." This article comes with complete "gay" political gain time line!

• Scary Spice v. Eddie Murphy heads to the court room. That's some baby mama DNA drama.

• Don Imus may file a lawsuit against CBS, thus ensuring we'll continue to hear America's most outrageously offensive catch phrase since "Let's Get Retarded".

• New York thinks it's time to come out of the American Idol closet.

• Don't forget Good Times tonight at Eastern Bloc! We'll totally be there. Details after the jump!

CONTINUED »

• Oprah watches "Flavor Of Love." And there are clips to prove it! [PopMuse]

• The Sartorialist features pics of dapper New Yorkers out on the streets. As random as it sounds, we love it. Scroll down to the Easter pics. So, so fantastic. [TheSartorialist]

• What your sleeping positions reveal about you and your lover. Don't be freaked out if you don't like to spoon all night; it doesn't mean you're not in a good relationship. It just means you hog the covers. [FemaleFirst]

• Illinois is creeping, creeping ever so slowly down the road towards rights for gay couples. Fast or slow, we're thrilled they're making the journey at all. [Rod 2.0]

• Definition of "The Love Bucket." Gross. A.k.a, the Gayest Blog Post Ever. Also: today is Jason's birthday, leave a comment and wish him a good one. [Jason'sRoom]

• So you can't find an Amanda Lepore doll? Buy a Dyke Doll instead. There must be a lesbian somewhere who could use one as a gift, hmm? [HotHouse]

We could be totally behind the ball on this one. And if you’ve seen it, then please forgive us. But we were just sent this clip from our buddy Tom. It’s Tom Cruise on Oprah.

Only this time, she gets it right. Major Giggle.

Tom Cruise on Oprah: The Way It Should've Been [Best Week Ever Blog]

Yes, every fag's wetdream has come true: Oprah and Brokeback together at last. The Malcontent has the clip.

Oprah Goes Brokeback [The Malcontent]

• He may have been a winner on Survivor, but Richard Hatch comes out a big 'ol loser in court. [Boston Globe]

• Brokeback Mountain is doing great business all on its own, but an Oprah episode will guarantee even bigger box office. [Towleroad]

• Gay activist Betty Berzon has lost her battle to cancer. RIP. [SF Gate]

• We all saw this one coming: Michael Jackson in women's clothes. [ABC News]

• Reeking of irony from all ends, the cop from the Village People is in trouble with the law. This will make for a juicy moment in the sure to follow Behind the Music special. [ABC News]

• Oprah Winfrey usually obliterates all of her competition, no matter what. Even in the sky. [CBS News]

• A lesbian running for office in Canada has rejected Rosie O’Donnell’s donation to her campaign. We don’t think it has anything to do with fear of her money being jinxed after she funded the Broadway flop Taboo. [The Toronto Star]

• A straight teen has been awarded nearly half a mill for being teased about being gay in school. How so very ironic. [Kansas City Star]

• Richard Hatch could end up spending the rest of his life behind bars for tax evasion which just goes to show that being a winner on a reality TV show doesn’t prevent you from losing in real life. [365 Gay]

• A French MP believes that gays are jeopardizing the world because we can’t procreate. Personally we think it’s the ones who are overpopulating Earth that are endangering us all. [London Daily Telegraph]

• The LAPD, in hoping to lure queers from the Windy City to sunny Southern California, is sponsoring the Gay Games. [Chicago Sun-Times]

Looking for some turkeys to stuff this year? Feces on the Family, or, excuse us, the group is called Focus on the Family, is going to be out in force along the length of the Macy’s parade, distributing materials promoting an ex-gay ministry. Macy’s can’t lift a limp whanger against the group because the parade is on public property. That doesn’t exactly excuse Dr. Phil and Oprah Winfrey, on whose programs “Feces” began running ads this past Monday.

Oprah once said: “Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.” Queerty calls for her to put her money where her mouth is and order the Feces ads removed from her program’s time slots.

An FOF web site offers visitors pages addressing various problems, including “Gambling” and “Spiritual Struggles;” they need to add one for “Narrow Mindedness.”

The campaign of ignorance about homosexuality will include the tossing out of hand-sized squeezable “stress balls” imprinted with the Feces ex-gay message. Queerty can think of no better protest than for drag queens to mob the parade route, catching the balls, squealing with delight, and then padding their bras with them. If Macy’s wants to make it up to us next year, they should introduce a balloon modeled on Jared Leto’s member.

While today’s Oprah Winfrey Show features coming out stories by Billy Porter (boyfriend to yesterday’s Morning Goods Ari Gold) and Queer Eye's Carson Kressley, it’s Oprah’s upcoming shows that have us all in a gay tizzy. I mean, really Oprah, where do you come up with these topics?

Seeing as we have a real job (yes, queen, this is a real job) we simply do not have the time to watch Ms. O’s show like we did back in the day. Which may be a good thing now that she is the new Jerry Springer.

Please take a look at these shows Oprah and her staff are currently cooking up.

Is Your Spouse having an Affair?

Did You Cheat On Your Spouse?

Do You Take Medication for Mental Illness?

Got a BIG TIME JEANS DILEMMA?

Are you friends with your husband's mistress?

Addicted to sex?

Living With Someone Who is Mentally Ill?

Do you have a mental illness?

Laid off: And struggling to make ends meet?

Used to TURN HEADS — and now you're LOSING YOUR LOOKS

Do you know a man who has developed breasts?

Do you suffer from vaginal odor?

Do you suffer from extremely bad hangovers?

Do you know someone who vomits in his or her sleep?

Do you know someone who has "broken" their penis?

Do you suffer from urinary tract infections?

Has OCD taken over your life?

Are you the victim of a medical mistake?

Were you conned by your man?

Is there a moment you wish you could back?

Oh, wait. These people sound like our best friends.

• Andrew Sullivan's blog has gone MSM. It will now be a part of Time.com. We're much too jealous to accuse him of selling out.

• Germany has won the 2010 Gay Games which will definately piss off their neighbor's new president.

• Just as we suspected. New York Magazine loves bears.

• This Thursday's Oprah is titled "When I Knew I Was Gay." Guest Carson Kressley will reveal that he knew in first grade. Most likely when his show and tell project turned out to be a make-over of his frumpy teacher.

• That much anticipated queer-restricting document from the Vatican is being released at the end of the month. What a thoughtful early Christmas gift from the Church to gay Catholic priests everywhere.

• Oprah's style bitch Nate Berkus has finally published his own design book. Lucky for us, he's in almost every picture.

• Sheryl Swoopes adorns the cover of the new Advocate demonstrating that holding large balls still puts a smile on her face.

• A UK register's office is replacing pictures of "Romeo and Juliet on a Swing" with gaudy landscape paintings so as to not offend gay couples. Guess they're totally fine with offending our sensibilties.

• Madge says she first fell for her husband when she saw him with his shirt off. That settles it. She's definately a "gay man in a woman's body."

• Margaret Cho's Bam Bam and Celeste will close Outfest's Fusion film festival. We have high hopes for what could be the best fag/fag hag road trip movie ever.

Like everyone else, we found it strangely ironic that the man who gave Stella her groove back turned out to be a big old flaming queen. Yesterday Oprah snagged author/duped wife Terry McMillan and gay ex-hubby, Jonathon Plummer for their first sit-down since the two of them went the way of Brad and Jen.

Plummer, obviously embracing his newly found queerness, appeared to have arrived straight from a shopping spree at Express Men. And that Bart Simpson hair has got to go.

“I believe,” yapped McMillan on national TV, “that you’ve known all your life that you had feelings towards men.”

With so much lying and betrayal we were hoping for some drama. A Ricky Lake eye gouging, even some Jerry Springer chair-tossing. What we got instead was nothing but negligible acceptance tagged onto the thin veil of PR forgiveness.

Our favorite quote came from McMillan herself who insisted their romance was based on true love in the beginning; “I think Jonathon did love me. You can’t fake this.”

Terry, we hate to break it to you but it looks like he did.

•After spending the last few years productively cutting out "little pine-cone people with razor blades," Fiona Apple sets down her carving knife and releases a new album next week.

•Oprah sanctifies a musical version of The Color Purple with her golden touch. It's safe to say she isn't letting Rosie O'Donnell and Boy George anywhere near this one.

•We suppose even drunken queens in Boston have to laugh.

•Let the record show that Queerty does not need Viagara. Hell, we're still only a month old.

•R.I.P. gay writer (and cannibalism dabbler), Tobias Schneebaum.