Katy Perry Kiss-Raped By Crazy Latina “Personality”

It was only a matter of time before Katy Perry got her comeuppance for penning a pop song about lesbian experimentation, when she in fact, has done no such thing. As many you have pointed out, her hits song, the factually untrue ‘I Kissed a Girl’ has made Katy Perry into the James Frey of disposable teen pop– and just like Oprah, we demand justice. If we can’t trust our saccharine pop balladeers to provide us with totally authentic, verifiable generic statements about love and sex, who can we trust?

Rest easy America: Justice has been served in the form of Perez Hilton protege La Coacha (they have a sex tape together), who proves that you can get away with anything if you do it under the guise of a made-up personality.

Watch doe-eyed Katy Perry helplessly play along as La Coacha pulls a chapstick out of her brassiere and offer it to Perry, unaware it’s all a set-up. Then, boom! La Coacha charges at Perry and starts kissing her. Katy Perry’s face is a mask of horror as she tries to escape from the La Coacha’s terrifying grip. Perry runs off and La Coacha sings that stupid song and dances around in triumph.

What’s funny about this clip is that if a random person on the street came up to Katy Perry, bum-rushed her and started to kiss her, security would be pinning her down in a heartbeat, but because La Coacha has a camera, she gets away with it. Remember when Man Bites Dog was still considered a satire?

At this point, we really do feel bad for Perry, whose only crime was wanting to make millions of dollars off of the fact that guys think it’s hot when girls make out. At least now when she comes out with her new hit “I Was Raped in Public By Some Crazy Mexican Bitch”, nobody will complain.