Americans For Truth About Homosexuality’s Peter LaBarbera, who should really go on a comedy tour, has inevitably weighed in on the airport security pat-downs that have Shep Smith in a tizzy. LaBarbera is just as concerned for passenger safety, because who knows about all the gay TSA workers who are enjoying their jobs a little too much?

LaBarbera wants to make sure straight passengers just trying to get from Point A to Point B aren’t “groped” by homosexuals in uniform.

“The reality is, most traveling men would not want Barney Frank to pat them down at the airport security checkpoint,” LaBarbera says. “Neither would it be fair to assign Ellen DeGeneres to pat down female travelers. (In the same vein, the Army should no more force normal male soldiers to shower and bunk with homosexual male soldiers than it would force females soldiers to bunk and shower with their male counterparts.)”

So how to keep America safe from homosexual domestic pat-down terrorists? Suggests LaBarbera:

* Perhaps some common-sense, healthy “discrimination” is in order: the TSA should put conditions on employment for self-acknowledged homosexuals – that they not be assigned to pat down travelers so as to avoid being put in sexually compromising situations;

* It would not be workable to assign, say, gay male TSA agents to pat down female travelers – as the latter – thinking the agents to be normal men – would protest that they are being patted down by males. Chaos would ensue;

* Does the TSA know which of its employees are homosexual, anyway, and how? If not, is it fair to travelers who may end up getting ‘groped’ by homosexual TSA agents who are secretly getting turned on through the process?

* Could the TSA be subjected to a sexual harassment lawsuit if the agent who engages in an overly aggressive “same-gender pat-down” – and gets sued – turns out to be homosexual?

All great ideas, Peter. But I think the first question should be aimed your way: Can a gay TSA worker sue passenger Peter LaBarbera for stripping down to his underwear in the middle of the security aisle without being asked? Because really, bud, someone sounds a little too eager to be groped.

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