amateur hour

Trump attorney Alina Habba is getting skewered by her own peers for being absolutely awful at her job

By · 30 comments

The last time we covered Alina Habba, the ubiquitous Trump attorney was at her boss’ New Hampshire victory party despite telling a judge she couldn’t appear in court that day because of a covid exposure.

Since then, Trump lost his defamation case to E. Jean Carroll, and was ordered to pay the journalist a whopping $83.5 million in penalties. And Habba is getting skewered for her performance in the courtroom, even by folx in the Trump World.

One of Trump’s ex-lawyers, Timothy Parlatore, said in a recent interview with CNN’s Kaitlin Collins that he thinks Habba was useless.

“From my perspective, I would regret having her represent him,” he said. “I think in both these trials, he was essentially un-defended.”

In other words, Parlatore believes Habba was as effective as a folding chair, and far more abrasive.

Parlatore wasn’t unfair to Habba either, which makes his criticism stick even more. He acknowledged the case was a loser from the start, given that a separate jury already found Trump liable for defaming Carroll, who says he sexually assaulted her in a department store dressing room in the 1990s.

But he said another attorney could’ve received a more favorable judgment. Unfortunately, Habba frequently cashed with Judge Lewis A. Kaplan, which didn’t endear her to jurors.

“I think it could have turned out differently,” he opined.

For his appeal, Parlatore said he thinks Trump should pick different representation.

“You want someone who is actually an appellate expert and I do not believe Alina is an appellate expert,” he said.

If Habba spoke as diplomatically, maybe Trump would be in better shape!

Though Trump might be better off switching attorneys, it’s probably too late. Habba has already filed a motion to overturn the case. Unsurprisingly, it is filled with laughable claims.

Her central argument comes down to a New York Post article that reports Carroll’s attorney, Roberta Kaplan, worked at the same law firm as Judge Kaplan. The Post article alleges Judge Kaplan acted as her mentor.

In addition, Habba alleges Carroll’s other lawyer, Shawn Crowley, once served as Judge Kaplan’s law clerk, and he co-officiated her wedding. Thus, she argues, the court was “overly hostile” towards the quadruply-indicted, twice-impeached, one-term ex-president.

Related:

What’s really going on with Trump’s lawyer Alina Habba?

Habba appeared at Trump’s New Hampshire victory party Tuesday, despite telling the judge in his defamation case that she was exposed to COVID over the weekend.

Even if the aforementioned claims are true, other lawyers say that’s really no big deal.

“This is a bogus motion by the Trump team. There’s nothing here,” said CNN legal analyst Eli Honig. “Every judge in that courthouse knows, socializes with, has worked with, sometimes maybe mentored, dozens, hundreds of attorneys in this city.”

Hmmm. It’s almost like Habba isn’t part of the club, or something. 🤔

TBH, the case was a mismatch in court. Carroll’s attorney, Roberta Kaplan, is one of the most accomplished and well-respected litigators in the country, representing Edie Windsor in the landmark Supreme Court case that overturned the Defense of Marriage Act.

Habba, meanwhile, appeared to arrive on Trump’s radar after she tricked an employee of Trump National Golf Club in Bedminster into signing an NDA in a parking lot after she alleged she was sexually assaulted by a manager.

Kaplan disproved one of Trump’s central arguments, that he doesn’t know Carroll and has–surprise!–never met her before in his life, with one damning photograph.

Appearing on MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow Show Monday evening, Crowley suggested Habba’s uncontrollable client was behind her more outrageous conduct.

“I think that she had a hard job and you could definitely see a difference between her sort of style when [Trump] was in the court room,” she said.

“She was much more disciplined and frankly acted more like a lawyer when he wasn’t there. When he was, you could hear him telling her when to object and muttering things and loudly being frustrated with her.”

Regardless, it doesn’t seem like Habba is going to leave Trump’s side any time soon. She’s been filling in for MIA Melania for months, appearing at her boss’ political events and even accompanying him to his lame New Year’s Eve party featuring Vanilla Ice.

Related:

Melania is still MIA but Trump swears she’s gonna join him on the campaign trail soon… probably…

Melania Trump continues to be absent from the presidential campaign trail.

Recently, a former Trump staffer was ejected from his victory party after posting a pic with her the same day she seemingly lied to Judge Kaplan about that covid exposure we mentioned earlier.

Busted!

She’s clearly ride-or-die for Trump.

With four criminal indictments and 91 felony charges, the ex-president has a slew of attorneys on his payroll (assuming they’re getting paid, unlike Rudy Giuliani). But at this point, Habba stands above below the rest.

At least until he dumps her for a newer model.

Don't forget to share:

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Once Monthly Annually

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated