hindsight 2020

9 dudes who challenged people’s ideas of what it means to be “straight” in 2020

[tps_header] If there’s one thing we know for certain, it’s that people’s perspectives on sexuality and sexual identity are changing and that it’s happening faster than ever before. Over the past year, more and more straight-identifying men have started talking openly about their same-sex curiosities, attractions, and identities–topics that, not that long ago, were still considered taboo by many. Some guys have begun sharing about the times they’ve experimented with other dudes. Others are dropping the whole “straight” moniker and identifying as bisexual, pansexual, or bicurious. And then there are those who are ditching labels altogether and encouraging others to do the same. Click through for nine dudes who challenged people’s ideas about sexuality, identity, and what it means to be “straight” in the year 2020… [/tps_header]

Tyler Posey

The Teen Wolf recorded a candid video in October offering explicit details about his sex life, most notably that he’s taken a dip in the man pond. “I haven’t had sex with a man,” he confessed. “We’ve blown each other, you know what I mean. But never had sex. So yes, I have been with men before.” He also added that he’s been “f*cked with a strap on,” just in case you were wondering. Related: WATCH: Tyler Posey opens up about hooking up with guys and bottoming

Yungblud

In February, the British pop star said he considered himself “very fluid” but “more straight.” In December, he announced, actually, he’s pansexual. He’s attracted to people, not genders. Not only that, but his sexuality is “ever-evolving,” he’s open to whatever feels good, and he thinks Harry Styles is a total babe. Related: Halsey’s boyfriend, Yungblud, says his sexuality is ‘very fluid’

Mike Taveira

While we’re on the subject of pansexuality, the indie singer released his song “Curious” in February which revealed the complex layers to his sexuality. The video depicted Taveira in a variety of steamy situations alongside drag queens, cis gay men, cis straight women, non-binary lovers, and trans women. Taveira was curious about them all, and he wasn’t afraid to explore. Related: WATCH: Mike Taveira wears a singlet and gets slapped with a leather crop to satisfy his curiosities

Bad Bunny

In March, the Puerto Rican rapper and longtime LGBTQ ally said that, while he’s attracted to women, he isn’t interested in labeling his sexuality. Like many people, he views it as fluid. “It does not define me,” he said. “At the end of the day, I don’t know if in 20 years I will like a man. One never knows in life.” Related: Bad Bunny opens up about sexual fluidity, won’t rule out being with a man

Jerry Falwell Jr.

OK, here’s a little curveball. This past summer we learned the antigay evangelical leader might be into cuckolding. At least, according to his former pool boy, Giancarlo Granda, who alleged that Falwell used to masturbate while Granda made love to his wife, Becki, in their marriage bed. Nothing wrong with that, of course. Unless you’ve built a career on judging others for their unbiblical bedroom behavior. Sounds like Falwell might still have some work to do when it comes to embracing his own fluidity, but experimenting is the gateway to acceptance! Related: Here it is, the ultimate Jerry Falwell Jr. pool boy tell-all

Slav the 11 incher

unsolicited nudes, Grindr, Texas, law, misdemeanor In November, a straight-identifying man by the name of Slav said that posting photos of his 11 incher to Twitter during quarantine opened his mind to the idea of being with a man. After sharing his nudes just for the hell of it, Slav was bombarded with other men’s nudes, which he was surprised to find turned him on. “I think if I met the right one, and got to know and like and trust him,” he said. “I might find the courage to explore.” Related: Straight guy says posting pics of his enormous, ahem, talent on Twitter may have turned him bisexual

Bastian Yotta

The 43-year-old German billionaire launched an OnlyFans page in August. Though he identifies as straight, Yotta primarily caters to a male audience and often exchanges flirty messages and x-rated photos with gay adult performers on Twitter. “You think I am crazy” he tweeted in November, shortly before having his account suspended. “Hell YES! I don’t give a f*ck at all. Big shout-out to my gay community. You guys have good taste.”

Related: German billionaire launches OnlyFans page because, hey, why not?

Lil Yachty The 22-year-old rapper fired back at fans who called him gay for impersonating Oprah Winfrey in his music video, “Oprah’s Bank Account,” in March. Yachty took to Twitter to say that guys who are uncomfortable seeing another guy dressed in women’s clothing need to get over themselves and rethink how they view masculinity. This wasn’t his first brush with homophobes either. In 2017, he received similar backlash for featuring a gay couple kissing on the cover his album Teenage Emotions. Related: Rapper Lil Yachty slams homophobes accusing him of being gay for wearing women’s clothing

Antonio Pavón

Last but not least, the Spanish reality star and single dad casually admitted back in May that, yeah, he’s fooled around with dudes before. In an appearance on the daytime talk show Sábado Deluxe, Pavón said there was no penetration involved and it was mostly just touching and grabbing, but he teased that he wouldn’t be opposed to experimenting further if the right guy came along, provided he was “handsome.” Related: Reality star takes polygraph test to squash gay rumors… then admits he’s fooled around with guys

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated

24 Comments*

  • Cam

    How are some of these guys on the list? Stating that you are Pan, or that you’ve slept with people of the same sex isn’t “Challenging the idea of what it means to be straight”, it’s admitting that you are Pan, Bi, etc. And some guy gayibaiting by earning money trying to get gay guys to look at his nudes isn’t a new thing.

  • Res1

    This list was unnecessary. It reads reaching and thirsty.

  • iminheatlikeacat

    Erm…yeah…talking about doing sexual acts with another man isn’t challenging the idea of what it’s like to be straight, it’s revealing that they aren’t.

  • olfwob

    Bastian Yotta is definitve not a billionair. He owes the gferman tax office a lot of money.

  • Donston

    Most of the guys listed here have either avoided saying that they’re “straight” or are flat-out not “straight” identifying. You’re giving some of these guys identities that they don’t embrace, and you’re filtering their lives, their sense of self, their struggles, their experiences through your own fantasies, paraphiliacs and identity politics. It’s extremely problematic. And there’s no way in hell you’d get away with doing this to women.

    While being an authority figure who is religious, has “Conservative” views and anti “queer” politics yet who indulges non hetero behaviors, that’s not anything new or “challenging”. It’s pretty much a cliche at this point. “Straight” and overall hetero-leaning guys using dudes who are unabashedly into guys for attention, validation and/or money isn’t really “challenging” anything either.

    We should be preaching that everyone has their own things going own, their own struggles, dimensions, experiences, journeys and motivations. We should be helping people get the differences between behaviors, attractions, arousals, desires, enjoyment, experimentation, curiosities, comfort, preferences and extent of sex drive. We should be assisting people to understand fluidity, contractions and the romantic, sexual, affection, emotional investment, commitment spectrum. But you can’t half-heartedly promote those things just to indulge your “straight” and hetero-leaning worship and your general fantasies. You end up sensationalizing, fetishizing and belittling people, behaviors and identities. You’re adding onto issues like “straight” superiority and privileges, “gay” inferiority, hetero pressures, internalized homophobia, identity politics and ignorance. You’re ultimately not helping anybody.

    At this point, Graham has got to be trolling for views and comments. Or maybe he genuinely doesn’t get how thirsty, pathetic and contradictory he comes off.

    • Cam

      Agreed

  • Bosch

    Calling these guys straight, and indulging the new generation’s twisted definition of sexual orientation, is borderline homophobic.

    • Donston

      Don’t be condescending and dismissive to the “new generation”. It just makes you come off old and lame. Sexuality, orientation, gender and identity will never be cut and dry things.

      Heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, etc. – these words are supposed to represent technical aspects of sexuality and orientation. However, someone’s “sexuality” is made of a lot of different things. While any of those aspects may or may not experience whatever types of fluidity depending on the person. That doesn’t even touch on romantic passions, emotional investment or commitment contentment. Shit can be so weird that somebody may be “technically” homosexual but have an overall hetero orientation. Or someone may prefer hetero sex but have stronger homo affections, investment and relationship contentment. Or someone may be “technically” homo but prefer to live a pan lifestyle. Or whatever. While there are many other things that will always affect what people do or how they present themselves: prejudice, fear, family, religion, ego, insecurities, resentments, internal phobias, wanting attention, not wanting attention, money, trauma, mental health.

      The point is that everyone has their own thing going on from a psychological and sociological perspective. While gender, sexuality, orientation and relationships are all person by person things. And you don’t really know what’s going on with anyone no matter their identities, what they indulge or how they present themselves. I know that all of this frustrates some people or pisses some people off. But we gotta come up with better ways to communicate with each other and respect one another.

      Graham is using these things merely to indulge fantasy, as click bait and to re-establish his own politics. That’s what makes him (and to some degree this site and a lot of other sites) problematic.

  • AxelDC

    If a guy sleeps with guys, he’s not straight. If a guy eats meat, he’s not vegan. Words have definitions.

    Any gay guy who calls himself “straight” is just too cowardly to come out.

    • Donston

      There are a shit ton of “gay” identifying dudes who indulge hetero behaviors, claim that they’re not really homo, claim that they’ve enjoyed sexually engaging with women and/or have had girlfriends or wives. There is no way to “prove” sexuality or orientation. People will always say they are whatever they want to say they are. Period. You will never have any control over people’s identities. So, that is something folks need to get over. That’s why it’s important to not stay so hung on identity and look at people as individuals.

      You got Graham using identity politics and “straightness” for sociology, click bait and to reduce people to fantasies and archetypes. And then you have a bunch of bitter people in the comment section who don’t really understand much of anything beyond their sense of self and their experiences. And you’re both just adding to the problems.

    • D_Bro

      I’ve had sex with a lot of women in the past. I enjoyed it thoroughly. But I identify as gay. Am I wrong? Am I not gay? I wonder what my husband thinks?

      I’ve also bottomed several times but identify as a top. Because I have tried bottoming does not make me a bottom or even vers. It just means that I have tried it, enjoyed it somewhat, but don’t really want to do it more.

      Stop throwing labels at people just because they don’t fit what you deem to be straight. It’s really very narrow minded.

    • Cam

      @Donston

      Except if a guy is sleeping with guys, then claiming he is straight, the correct label for that is “Closeted”. not “Straight”. Advocating for that is simply supporting the bigotry and hate that keeps people closeted.

  • nm4047

    seems more like struggling (want to be) celebrities seeking publicity

    • trsxyz

      Yep, that’s my take as well…

  • Josh447

    Very sexy line up. No doubt things are changing for curious guys as the pressure cooker lid comes off to stay silent at all costs. Gay marriage being legalized was a big kick off for the “hmm it’s legal for guys to like guys now” game. Tres cool.

    If it’s for advert or not, it’s still on record these guys aren’t backing phobes and going lock step in the opposite direction with zero reversal in sight.

    Only our fantasies might belie what these guys get up to between the sheets or…wherever whenever.

  • ShiningSex

    Tyler is gay gay gay gay. Blowjobs is sex you moron.

    • Josh447

      Yup. He obviously needed clarification. haha

  • smartguyd

    The comments here show how old fashioned Queerty readers skew. Part of the future of an open and accepting society is understanding that being able to explore and still identify as straight or cis is a normal and valid part of human sexuality and gender identity. And your sexuality or gender changing/evolving over your lifetime is normal. As more people are allowed to be themselves early in life it becomes obvious that non-repressed straight/cis people may change their identity naturally over their lives just as lgbtq+ people may have shifting identities over time. Just because you identify as pensexual at 35 doesn’t delegitimize your identity and experience as straight for 34 years if that identity was truly who you were.

    • Donston

      The problem is that everyone is right to a degree. People do purposely manipulate others. People do still use “straight” as a cloaking device. People (even “out” people) do contend with hetero pressures, internalized homophobia, gay insecurities, religious guilt, etc. There is a decent amount of “queer baiting” for attention, money and validation. While “straight”, heterosexual, hetero-leaning, non-homo-leaning privileges, worship and superiority complexes are still things.

      On the other hand, a lot of people clearly don’t get that there are many aspects of sexuality and many different forms of sexuality. A lot of people still don’t get or accept fluidity. A lot of people have no sympathy toward other people’s traumas or mental health struggles or confusions. A lot of people place attractions or sexual behaviors above all else instead of looking at the entirety of the gender, romantic, sexual, emotional, commitment spectrum. Neither side of the identity debate wants to admit that it’s a complicated, f-ed up and person-by-person discussion.

      The article itself is problematic not because it’s talking about dimensions and journeys. It’s problematic because this site, and a lot of “queers” in general, still use “straight” as click bait and to reduce people to fantasies. It’s problematic because Graham is giving some of these guys identities that they don’t embrace. (Almost none of these dudes listed have publicly called themselves “straight”). It’s also upsetting because “gays” are constantly criticized for being obsessed with “straight” people and lusting after them. And this site doesn’t help to subvert that stereotype. Finally, guys have been fooling around with guys or doing “queer-ish” things yet saying that they’re “straight” since forever. It ain’t anything new. Yet, year after year, this site keeps acting as if they’ve just discovered something. Talk about real shit instead of treating people’s identities, dimensions and struggles as sensationalism, as an excuse to illicit fantasy or as merely an excuse to post shirtless pics from someone’s Instagram. It’s tired and very transparent. I don’t know. I guess I keep expecting Graham and this site to grow up. But it’s apparent that’s not gonna happen.

    • Cam

      @smartguyd

      Except a man sleeping with men, or a woman sleeping with women then labeling themselves as “Straight” is the very definition of the closet. You are defending the culture of bigotry and fear that keeps people from identifying and being honest with themselves.

  • CityguyUSA

    I’ve been saying this for a while. There’s a model that keeps saying he’s not labeling himself and I keep saying by not labeling you mean you’re in denial of whatever you are but most people only deny if they’re not in sync with society’s norms. It doesn’t imply that you’re straight nor does it imply you’re gay just that you’re not saying because you’re “afeared.”

  • skeldare

    Nothing “straight” about this

  • Biscuits

    How brave – 9 cowards who said nothing.

  • ScottOnEarth

    That picture of Yunglud is amazing!!! The over-arching theme of these stories is that everyone marches to their own beat. Don’t judge. Don’t project. And, most of all, don’t criticize other people’s choices because it’s none of your f-ing business.

Comments are closed.