HOMO FOR THE HOLIDAYS

Christmas Divas: Five Singers Who Ought To Release Holiday Albums

Cher

Believe it or not, in her nearly 50-year career Cher has never released a proper holiday album. She did a Christmas TV special with Sonny once, and she’s put out a few holiday singles (including one featuring Rosie O’Donnell), but no actual album yet. We think it’s high time the diva consider recording one. After all, what does she have to lose?

Listen to her auto-tuned holiday dance song Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home) featuring Rosie O’Donnell. It’s a-maz-ing.

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34 Comments

  • Caine

    Seriously? 5 Choices and you pick Kanye West? I’m out.

  • Cam

    Not a huge Mariah Carey fan but I have to say that if you like Christmas CD’s hers was pretty great.

  • Niall

    Yes if there’s one thing I’ve always thought Christmas music lacked, it’s a bit of Britney Spears and Kanye West.

  • kpj558

    R.I.P Donna Summer. She would have taken all these other bitches to school.

  • jimbryant

    Spare us these “divas”. All they do is give us gay guys a false sense of security. They prevent gay and bisexual male singers from having success on the charts. They are blocking them.

    There is not one openly gay or bisexual male singer in the ITunes top 200 singles chart. Not one. Nuff said.

  • Tyler100

    @jimbryant:

    That’s it Jim: female pop stars have conspired against gay and bisexual men to prevent them from being successful in the music biz. Those Illuminati wenches and their crafty reverse-sexism laced with homophobia are to blame for the lack of majorly successful, openly gay and bisexual men in music. That’s a perfectly sound and not an all crazy idea. You’re super sane and it shoes.

    You’re mentally ill and desperately paranoid. Nuff said.

  • Bob LaBlah

    Believe it or not, Rupaul not only has a VERY NICE Christmas CD but his/her very memorable TV special from the 1990’s is well worth a look on Youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVUSl7no6cI

    I do wish SOMEONE had stopped Madonna from butchering Santa Baby. Only the late, great Eartha Kitt can do that song at Christmas time.

  • jimbryant

    Are you so stupid that you can’t see that these divas have blocked gay male success? I’m certainly not stupid.

    Let’s cut through the crap here. We gay guys have been fed this crap that these divas are gay-friendly and that they embrace us. Embrace us, my foot. All they really embrace is money. Money, money, money.

    We have been tricked into supporting these divas with the false embrace. What these divas are actually doing is physically blocking the idea that gay male singers should be charting. By blocking them, these divas have forced our allegiances down the path that leads to their bank accounts.

    Divas suck.

  • Tyler100

    @jimbryant:

    You’re right, Jim/Rick: you’re not stupid. You’re sick.

    If divas don’t embrace “us” then you and divas have that in common. Let’s cut through the crap here: you can’t stand gay men, particularly openly gay men. You loathe the entire LGBT community, but particularly the G community, because you hate yourself. Every and all comments you posted to this site are indicative of that.

    You suck.

  • jimbryant

    You know full well that there aren’t any openly gay male acts on the ITunes top 200 music charts. Have you ever bothered to question why?

    It’s because the recording labels won’t sign them. They prefer to sign “divas” whom they can then market to us gay guys as being “gay-friendly”. We’re being conned by the recording labels and by the divas.

    These divas are the product of homophobia. They are the enablers of homophobia. So long as we gay guys continue to embrace them, they will continue to be enablers of homophobia.

  • Tyler100

    @jimbryant:

    Just because you keep repeating it doesn’t magically turn that point into anything resembling truth. Shout it until your face turns blue. At the end of the day, the only truth realized is that you’re a hyper paranoid, misogynist troll who detests anything involving women or male effeminacy.

  • jimbryant

    Nobody cares about what you are saying except your reflection in the mirror.

    I’ve made a factual case. There are no openly gay or bisexual male singers in the ITunes top 200. This proves that there is a campaign to keep them out. “Divas” are a part of this campaign to keep us out.

  • Tyler100

    @jimbryant:

    The only convincing argument you’ve made is for your institutionalization.

  • queertyreader

    I absolutely don’t like Beyoncé and Kanye West because they wear fur (and Beyoncé even produces it with her own clothing line). Anyone who has ever seen a video of a Chinese fur farm (I encourage you to take a look on YouTube) will agree that it is absolutely WRONG to wear or endorse fur. Only people who have no emotions would do such a thing.

  • Deepdow

    Ugh Jimbryant

    I would actually gay bash you.

  • Cam

    @jimbryant:

    Yes Jim, we get it, somebody’s mommy didn’t hug him enough and now you hate all women.

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  • Rockery

    @Caine:

    Kanye was one of the first rappers at the height of his career to speak out not only against homophobia, but to speak positively about the gay community.

    Mariah Carey makes Christmas special, great voice

    @Tyler100: @Cam: @Deepdow:

    Underneath his hatred for women and odd tangents he does have a point that no one has addressed all year. Why are there no OUT men in the on top of Billboard 200 not even a single on Top 100? Where is our community? How many known Out performers have even made Top 50? Can you name 5? Adam Lambert, RuPaul, Elton John I can’t think of anyone else off hand… It’s something to think about.

  • nf0603

    I love the conspiracy theory that divas prevent gay men from making the charts. Why not blame rap or country as well? Country takes up a lot of chart positions and so does rap. How about the plight of rock musicians in 2013 where pretty much every guitar-oriented act is labeled a “hipster act” and only makes indie charts and we have a generation now who thinks Maroon 5 is a rock band when they’re really just an older One Direction.

    It isn’t divas holding gay men back on the charts… it’s fundamentalist right-wing Christians who think we deserve AIDS and to go to hell.

    I do love Jimbryant’s rants about how much women hate gay men and everything… when if anything women seem more openminded to LGBT issues than straight men. I remember when Queer As Folk was on the air, it was well known that adult straight women made up the biggest part of the viewing audience for the show, not gay men. Look at how fanatical Adam Lambert’s female fans are and how they try to act like being a fan of his that they understand what being gay is like more than those of us who ARE gay men but not a fan of his lame milquetoast pop music. This whole “women hate us” thing is just playing a victim.

  • nf0603

    @Rockery: Kanye may be pro-gay, but he’s still a huge arrogant douchebag who has alienated more people than made fans by his pompous “I am God” attitude and his behaviour. He might support the gay community, but it doesn’t take away the fact that he’s a prick who sees himself as the second coming. Just because he supports gay rights doesn’t mean I have to like a man who has aligned himself with the Kardashian family, the biggest famewhores on the planet… proving he’s no better than they are if he can have any woman on the planet and chooses her.

  • nf0603

    @jimbryant: Why divas and no other act? Why are divas holding gay men back any more than all the country artists that sell big numbers or the rappers, or everyone else who has a spot on the chart?

    And I love the irony that you have such an innate hatred for divas while having Bryant in your username… Guess you are the type of masochist who loves being spit on and having people put cigarette burns out on you if you name hate “divas” but have a love for Anita Bryant… someone who could’ve had a huge gay following but threw her gays away and treated us worse than dirt. I bet you also queen out over Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann and how “fabulous” they are, correct?

  • jimbryant

    Rockery,

    The problem is that we gay guys have been lulled into a sense of false security by these divas. We are led to believe that these divas are “fiercely standing up” for us gays. It lulls us into thinking that we don’t need to worry anymore about gay representation.

    The sad and shocking truth is that these divas are holding us back. It’s a horrific truth.

    Keep in mind that, since that so-called gay advocate and purported diva Madonna hit the scene 30 years ago, only one openly gay American male has had commercial success, and that’s Adam Lambert. Out of thousands of pop acts, there has only been one. His success has vanished in recent years.

    Here’s another shocking truth: there is much greater acceptance of women who are gay or bisexual. Thus, there is a double standard which is holding gay men back. Women are largely to blame.

  • Tyler100

    @jimbryant:

    Another shocking truth: you need proper mental health treatment and a hug.

  • jimbryant

    I call it as I sees it. The divas are holding us back.

  • nf0603

    what about Frank Ocean?

    Lambert’s career didn’t live to expectations because his music was milquetoast pop crap. He went on and on about how he was this “rock star” and how his idols were Bowie and Freddie Mercury and how he wanted to bring glam rock back yet when his album came out it was the exact same watered down soccer mom garbage that acts like Maroon 5 and Daughtry made. Gays didn’t embrace him not because of internalized homophobia, but because there’s no reason we should embrace someone if we can’t stand the music. Adam tailored his music for 40 year old housewives who consider Maroon 5 to be a hip and edgy rock band, not for gay audiences.

  • jimbryant

    Frank Ocean has never said he’s gay.

  • jimbryant

    The key thing to understand here is that the labels where these divas are signed will not sign an openly gay male singer. This is further evidence that the divas are part of a ploy to hold us gay guys back.

  • Tyler100

    @jimbryant:

    Christmas is coming up, Jim/Rick. What size should I get your tinfoil hat in?

  • krystalkleer

    ok 1st off Jim…yer just a few flavors short of a bowl of fruit loops…enough with the pour’n of yer mental milk! Boy George…Pete Burns…Elton John…Adam Lambert? correct me if i’m wrong (actually don’t cuz you will be anyways) but are ya gett’n the picture here? and lastly…the BIGGEST DIVA of them ALL…M-A-D-O-N-N-A was brilliant with Santa Baby…and needs to come out with her own xmas cd!! http://getoffmydress.blogspot.com/2013/12/ho-ho-hold-up-minute.html

  • nf0603

    @jimbryant:

    Can you humor us please and name us five singers you do like? You hate artists you consider homophobic, you hate openly gay acts… but at the same time hate artists who are embracive of LGBT rights and gay fans because you are a conspiracy theorist who believes that they’re all secretly the same as Anita Bryant and want to keep the gay man down. Seriously, I bet Cyndi Lauper for example has done more for the gay community than you ever will.

  • jimbryant

    Pete Burns, Elton John and Boy George were British, not American. They were not out during their success. After John and George came out, their success on the chart waned.

    Let’s face it – the divas are holding us back. They are blocking gay male success on the charts.

  • nf0603

    @jimbryant:

    Look. I like very few of the pop divas on the charts now. I can’t stand Gaga, Britney, Beyonce, Katy Perry, etc…, but my dislike of those artists has nothing to do with “homophobia” but more that my musical preferences are in another direction. I bet you were one of those five people who threw their Madonna fandom away when she defended Eminem’s right to freedom of speech despite looking at the bigger picture and realizing she would’ve come off the biggest hypocrite in the world if she’d called Eminem out and told him what he cannot say after all the times people tried to silence her a decade earlier.

    And again. Name me five artists that meet the Jimbryant stamp of approval. You’re really reaching if you’re wasting energy that should be saved for Westboro Baptist Church and other religious and conservative leaders on people like Lady Gaga, Madonna and Cyndi Lauper (who I think has more than shown she is a true ally to the community. She opened a shelter for runaway gay teens… what have YOU done to help gay people in need?). If you’re going to hate Gaga, hate her for the fact that everything she does is a gimmick and that she’s flash over substance, not because you fear that she’s secretly a Bible-totin’ bigot even though she wrote a song for Adam Lambert and gave Scissor Sisters an opening act slot on her tour, exposing them to a larger audience.

  • nf0603

    Jimbryant, we’re still waiting.

    FIVE artists, just five, that you actually like. It isn’t really hard, unless you hate homophobes for being homophobes, gays for being gay, and pro-gay straight artists for secretly being Anita Bryant’s with better business sense.

  • nf0603

    still waiting

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