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Jake Gyllenhaal gets handsy, Gay Pride nutcrackers & a homophobic pooch: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week

By · Updated on December 19, 2023
Three panel image. On the left, a nutcracker with a rainbow hat holding a rainbow flag. In the middle, Jake Gyllenhaal licks his lips while standing shirtless in a wrestling ring. On the right, a purple lighter featuring Cher from the '80s touching her long black hair.

We’ve officially made it to December! Everyone, take a deep breath… and please resist the urge to make jokes about how gay your Spotify Wrapped is.

Even though we’re still battling the remnants of a holiday hangover, the LGBTQ+ news did not slow down this week. Not only did we get a glimpse of hope ray of light about the future of the Madonna biopic, but we also learned some very important information about The Iron Claw stars’ body shaving practices. Whew!

On top of that, Paul Mescal and Andrew Scott kept us parched with the continuation of their All of Us Strangers press tour, Karan Brar warmed our hearts with a bold coming out essay, then Tom Daley joined forces with Gillian Anderson.

Oh yeah, and a dude streaked around Disneyland. Never a dull moment on Beyoncé’s internet!

Thankfully, we’ve got retail therapy, throwback bops, and cute boys delivered via algorithm to calm us down when it starts to feel like it’s too much.

Cozy up on the couch and get ready to make a list… then check it twice. Here are the 10 things we’re obsessed with this week.

1. Southern Fried Sass: A Queen’s Guide to Cooking, Decorating, and Living Just a Little ‘Extra’ by Ginger Minj

Two-panel image. On the left, drag queen Ginger Minj stands in a long purple gown in front of a purple doorway. She wears a curly blonde wig and holds a ham covered in pineapple on a plate and a martini glass. The image reads "Ginger Minj" and "Southern Fried Sass." On the right, Ginger Minj stands smirking on the red carpet in a fuzzy purple skirt and jacket. She wears a different curly blonde wig and pink eyeshadow and lipstick.
Image Credit: Amazon/Getty Images

We could all use a little bit more “extra.” Ginger Minj has always been one of the most inspiring RuPaul’s Drag Race queens, so I was extra gagged to learn the drag icon released her own book. In Southern Fried Sass, Ginger spills with stories from three seasons on the acclaimed show, as well as more than 50 recipes, ranging from Red Barn BBQ Ribs to Better Than Sex Cake. (Intriguing, right?!)

I’m always hesitant to add a full-on cookbook to the library, so I was delighted to see Ginger peppers in both anecdotes and advice to this collection. If you’re missing a little Fried Green Tomatoes in your life, look no further than this Florida-born queen’s literary debut, starting at $24.48 on Amazon.

2. Stanley 2.0 Flip Straw Tumbler Cup

Two-panel image. On the left, a water bottle covered in blue and orange swirls stands against a gray background. The bottle reads "Stanley" and its blue lid with straw sits next to it. On the right, the same cup is pictured with a purple lid and a dark and light purple swirl.
Image Credit: Urban Outfitters

Considering collecting brand names and labels has become a status symbol, I’ve always been particularly amused by the rise of “The Expensive Water Bottle.” Although Hydroflask and Yeti came before it, I can’t bring myself to underwrite these new to-go sippers from Stanley. With double-wall vacuum insulation, a cupholder-friendly shape, handy straw, and 30 ounces of liquid-storing capability, I think I may be a convert. The bottles’ quirky patterns –– like Pool Swirl and Iris Swirl, available for $35 at Urban Outfitters –– don’t hurt, either.

If that’s not enough, check out this TikTok from a woman whose car burned down. Though her interior was torched, the ice in her Stanley cup never melted. If that’s not a flex, I don’t know what it is.

3. This adult-friendly Christmas pop-up Santa’s Secret

Who says Christmas is just for the kids? Welcome to Santa’s Secret, a jam-packed (and completely Instagrammable) holiday experience. This grownup-focused event allows visitors to walk through larger than life holiday installations –– like dancing nutcrackers, rugged lumberjacks, and a life-sized Barbie and Ken –– before hitting up Santa’s very own speakeasy. With a warm libation in hand, guests are then treated to performances by ballet and burlesque dancers, avant-garde entertainers, and a five-piece band. And if that wasn’t enough, it’s all hosted by Drag Race alum Asia O’Hara. (Fingers crossed that I make the naughty list guest list.)

Tickets for the immersive event start at $58, and it runs until December 31 in both New York City and Los Angeles.

4. Josh Hutcherson with a mullet

Little is known about Amazon MGM Studios’ upcoming action film The Beekeeper, except that it’s led by Jason Staham and hits theaters on January 12, 2024. However, a recent promo pic revealed that co-star Josh Hutcherson sports a mullet in the flick.

Suddenly, I’m clutching my own achy breaky heart. No additional commentary necessary.

5. Pop Star Lighters

Three-panel image. On the far left, a lighter against a pink background featuring Taylor Swift singing into a microphone in a light pink and purple bodysuit. In the middle, two lighters on a dark pink background. The left lighter features a young Britney Spears smiling against a blue backdrop. The right lighter features Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie in bikini tops hugging from 'The Simple Life' era in the early 2000s. On the far right, a purple lighter stands against a purple background. A young Cher from the '80s touching her long black hair is printed upon it.
Image Credit: Friends NYC

As they say in Harry Potter, the wand chooses the wizard lighter chooses the smoker. Friends NYC’s collection of pop star lighters –– including LGBTQ+ ally faves like Taylor Swift, Britney Spears, Dolly Parton, and Cher –– is unparalleled in star power. Gone are the days of igniting a flame via a primary colored ignitor… or a free matchbook.

If you’re looking for a light that sparks both a flame and a conversation, look no further than their assortment (priced $7.99 – $14.49). How’s that for “Emotional Fire”?

6. This dog who hates gay kissing

@marysteakmediumrare

why the dog homophobic

♬ original sound – Glizzie McGuire

This hilarious TikTok from @marysteakmediumrare –– featuring a dog who growls every time it sees two boys kissing –– recently went viral, and I can’t stop laughing. Maybe the pooch was jealous? Perhaps it was emotionally scarred after seeing Brokeback Mountain?! Regardless, there’s no doubt this demon dog Chihuahua definitely voted red in the 2020 election.

7. Cup O’ Coffee Face and Body Mask

Two-panel image. On the left, a black canister reads "Cup O' Coffee Face and Body Mask by Lush." On the right, a closeup of a person scrubbing the brown coffee scrub against their cheek using their fingers. Only their cheek, hand, and left ear are visible in the frame.
Image Credit: Lush Cosmetics

Skincare… where does one even begin? It seems like every person –– and company–– has a differing dogma on how-to (and how-to-not) refresh their facade. Still, my favorite and most affective products have always come from Lush.

Their Cup O’ Coffee Face and Body Mask (5.3 oz for $17 and 11.5 oz for $33 online) has never disappointed. The coffee-filled scrub invigorates your skin with both its scent and texture, brushing away dryness and waking you up mentally and physically. If you live for the smell of Folgers in your cup –– or the smell of a Starbucks has gotten you erotically charged –– this one is for you.

8. “Murder on the Dance Floor” by Sophie Ellis-Bextor

I’m going to be honest, I had no idea who Sophie Ellis-Bextor was when she recently appeared as a guest judge on Drag Race UK. However, after hearing her song during the sexy final scene of Saltburn, I understand why she’s reached a Robyn-like status across the pond.

Spoilers aside, this 2001 Grease–spoofing bop is as addictive as it is danceable. If you’re looking to give Mariah Carey’s Christmas album a break, I highly recommend peppering this one into your playlists.

9. Pride Christmas Nutcracker Figure

Two-panel image. On the left, a white nutcracker wearing a rainbow hat, holding a rainbow flag and wearing a rainbow colored outfit stands against a white background. On the right, a similarly dressed Black nutcracker stands posed from a farther distance.
Image Credit: Joann

They had me at “Pride” and “nutcracker.” Double entendres aside, queer Christmas decorations have become a lightning rod for political outrage, which makes me even happier that Joann –– the queen of all craft stores –– has these lil’ gay soldiers in stock. They are ready to slay the Rat King and serve the house down boots. And considering I come from a family with a collection of more than 100 nutcrackers (I wish I was kidding), adding this fruity prince to the shelf has been a long time coming.

Your mom’s favorite department store has two 15 inch-tall LGBTQ+ options this year (on sale for a limited time at $9.99 online) that will surely make your yuletide gayer.

10. Jake Gyllenhaal gets sweaty in the ring

Jake Gyllennhaal stands shirtless and licking his lips in a wrestling ring in a still from upcoming movie 'Road House.' He is muscular with tattooed forearms and an indiscernible text tattoo on his right pec.
Image Credit: Amazon Studios

I don’t know where this movie came from, but I am so happy it exists. These pics of a beefed up Jake Gyllenhaal have been making the rounds (again) on Twitter X, and all of the sudden I’m a UFC fan. The snaps are from an upcoming reboot of Road House –– you know, that ’80s action flick that helped put Patrick Swayze on the map. Gyllenhaal portrays a former UFC fighter who scores a gig working security at a dive bar.

Unfortunately, it seems we won’t get a chance to see Jake on the big screen as Amazon recently confirmed the movie will go straight to streaming in 2024.

Still, with The Iron Claw (starring Zac Efron, Jeremy Allen White, and Harris Dickinson) also hitting theaters this year, it seems we’ve reached a Golden Age for straights stripping down to fight. Merry Christmas indeed!

Related:

Logan Lerman rows his boat, Madonna flexes her exes & Diet Coke candles: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week

Logan Lerman rows his boat, Madonna flexes her exes, and Diet Coke candles: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week

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