what's the frequency?

Redditors reveal how often they and their partners do the deed

If you think that everyone else is having more sex than you, you might be surprised. Reddit gays recently shared the frequency of their hook-ups with their significant others, and their answers ranged from intervals of years to intervals of hours.

By the way, one study found that 67 percent of gay couples in the first two years of their relationships reported having sex three or more times a week. Of the gay couples who had been together for 10 years or more, however, only 11 percent reported having sex that frequently.

In reporting those survey findings for Psychology Today in 2012, Amy Muise, Ph.D, also noted that people who compare their relationships to others’ “feel less secure and less satisfied in their relationships.” She added:

So, the answer to the question of how often couples typically engage in sex is that it varies and comparing your own sexual frequency to that of others may not be beneficial. Put another way, if you’re happy with how often you’re getting some (and with the quality of these activities), then it doesn’t really matter what others do.

Keep those words of wisdom in mind as you read these comments from the Reddit thread and see what gays said about how often they and their partners get down and dirty:

“The last time was about four years ago. He doesn’t like having sex, and I’m tired [of] asking him for it. It’s hard sometimes, but I’m getting over it as I’m getting older. We [have been] living together for about 11 years and [are] still together. Hardly [talk] about sex.”

“We haven’t had sex in four months because he’s going through some sh*t. I’m patient, but it’s frustrating.”

“In the same boat. [It] has been two months, and it’s hard to be patient sometimes.”

“Been together 12 years. Me 42, him 38. Maybe once a month. But we lead busy lives and, more often than not, fall into bed tired. It is absolutely no issue for us.”

“Thank you. Similar situation with high-level jobs (corporate attorney and ER doctor). Friends say it’s not normal. I’m 48, he’s 42. Been together for 20 years. … It’s about once a month unless we’re traveling.”

“Once or twice a month. Sex is not everything in a long-term relationship.”

“Been together 17 years, and usually once a week.”

“Twenty-five years together, and generally once a week, sometimes twice. When we go on vacation, it’s almost every day because we’re relaxed and have the time.”

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“Usually once a week, unless something is going on. Right now, we are both unemployed due to layoffs, and anxiety is killing our sex life.”

“Three years in. Usually at least twice on weekends when we are both off from work. Maybe once during the week, but our job times don’t always align.”

“[One to two times] a week. But we are only together on weekends. When we are on vacation, it is more.”

“Typically 1-2 times per week; but when we have a hot streak, it’s more like 3-5. (Twelve years together as a couple, lived together eight years.) We had a three-week dry spell recently because of my medication being adjusted. But the flood gates are open now that I’m mostly recovered!”

“Sex 3-5 times a week. Oral on non-sex days. I’m always on him!”

“Almost every day, but we live together.”

“Almost daily. Days we skip are usually made up the next day, though, lol.”

“My ex and I used to have sex every day whenever we were together, sometimes multiple times a day.”

“Every two hours.”

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