The A-List: Dallas Recap: “You’re Not Fat, You’re Just Hydrated”

Earlier, Taylor had met for lunch with a group of Log Cabin Republicans. In a confessional interview, he notes that he is not aligned with the group on a number of issues but that he intends to cultivate the business they might throw his way. Probably shouldn’t mention that on television, buddy.

Two of the Log Cabin guys are a longtime couple. Nobody mentions the irony of devotion to a political party whose leading lights and other top officials denigrate and disrespect them, and who actively work to prevent legal recognition of their relationship. Another guy asks if Taylor attends the local gay church. Of course he doesn’t! “Leave it to the gay church to have a laser show for Easter,” he says with a sneer. He also hauls out his infamous “plantation” quote and they raise a glass to being conservative gay men.

The remainder of the episode, if anyone is left watching after that scene, deals with Phillip engaging in his usual shit-stirring antics and rustling feathers with Levi and Chase. Levi has absolutely no interest in a romantic relationship and he says so; he also doesn’t appreciate Phillip’s meddling. Chase, for his part, does a bad job of pretending he doesn’t care about Levi’s horndogging and laconic attitude towards whatever they’ve got going on. Phillip picks up on this sore spot right away and continually pokes at it with a sharp stick.