good parenting

The Only Ones Who Had a Problem With Her Son Cross-Dressing On Halloween Were Other Mothers

If you want to read the Feel Good Parent’s Story Of The Year, then you must read this true life tale about one mother’s quest to make sure her son wore the Halloween costume of his choice, even if it was Daphne from Scooby Doo.

The post is titled “My son is gay,” but the first paragraph follows up with, “Or he’s not. I don’t care. He is still my son. And he is 5. And I am his mother. And if you have a problem with anything mentioned above, I don’t want to know you.” LOVE HER!

A few weeks before Halloween, this mom (writing under the username Cop’s Wife) says her son (who she calls Boo) decided he wanted to be Daphne for Halloween, but then grew scared other kids would laugh at him.

I was hesitant to make the purchase, not because it was a cross gendered situation, but because 5 year olds have a tendency to change their minds. After requesting a couple of more times, I said sure and placed the order. He flipped out when it arrived. It was perfect.

Then as we got closer to the actual day, he stared to hem and haw about it. After some discussion it comes out that he is afraid people will laugh at him. I pointed out that some people will because it is a cute and clever costume. He insists their laughter would be of the ‘making fun’ kind. I blow it off. Seriously, who would make fun of a child in costume?

But Boo ends up wearing the Daphne costume to his preschool — a Christian one at that. And this is where things go awry.

Two mothers went wide-eyed and made faces as if they smelled decomp. And I realize that my son is seeing the same thing I am. So I say, “Doesn’t he look great?” And Mom A says in disgust, “Did he ask to be that?!” I say that he sure did as Halloween is the time of year that you can be whatever it is that you want to be. They continue with their nosy, probing questions as to how that was an option and didn’t I try to talk him out of it. Mom B mostly just stood there in shock and dismay.

And then Mom C approaches. She had been in the main room, saw us walk in, and followed us down the hall to let me know her thoughts. And they were that I should never have ‘allowed’ this and thank God it wasn’t next year when he was in Kindergarten since I would have had to put my foot down and ‘forbidden’ it. To which I calmly replied that I would do no such thing and couldn’t imagine what she was talking about. She continued on and on about how mean children could be and how he would be ridiculed.

My response to that: The only people that seem to have a problem with it is their mothers.

And that, friends, is what this world needs more of: loving, caring mothers who aren’t afraid to tell other adults when they are being bullies. Happy Halloween.

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  • Mr. Enemabag Jones

    Just when I think I hate straight people, someone like this comes along.

    The kid’s probably going to grow up straight. But at least he’ll always remember that he had a mom who went to bat for him when it really mattered.

  • easyguy

    That’s one lucky kid

  • Jack

    Well, I feel better.

  • Princess Johnny-Love

    Props to his Mom for being cool enough to support him. He looks awesome!

  • Dollie

    @Ogre Magi: “Hello, Travis!” I love that video soo much, though I hope they explained to those boys that the segment was for comedic purpose and that there is nothing ACTUALLY wrong with them.

    What a terrific mother! And her son looked positively precious!

  • gina

    Mom is truly wonderful. But it’s interesting that the entire focus of this story is… “my son might be gay.” Why, did he mention he’s fantasizing about kissing other boys? No, he’s interested in cross-dressing which, in and of itself, has nothing to do with being gay. It’s gender expression, not sexual orientation.

    Then I wonder how she’d feel if her son started talking about having the wrong genitals or being a boy not a girl? I wonder if all the uber supportive peeps on that thread would be as supportive then.

    I’m glad she’s getting as much support as she is (and yes, her son is adorable) but let’s not confuse what people are really freaked about here… it’s not about the kid being gay.

  • AdonisFire

    Great mom, but if I was her I would have punched those homophobic transphobic bitches on their cunt!

  • Julie

    @ Gina – I think the mom kind of believed the myth that if your son displays feminine tendencies he must be gay, even though she wasn’t phobic about it. The media portrays gay men as feminine and a lot of people believe that nonsense. Crossing gender lines (transgender) is one of the ways mainstreamers use to identify a gay person, male or female. They have a lot to learn.

    Kudos to the mom for her support but I find it sad this is something so rare it makes the news. What is even more sad is how sensationalized this has become. “Boy dresses as a girl.” And people come out of the woodwork to see the freak. We have a lot of educating to do.

    That quack therapist on CNN needs to go back to psych school. Calling the reaction of the phobe moms “normal”? Common, yes. Normal, no. People are taught to be phobic. A phobic reaction is NOT normal, it’s just social conditioning. CNN should better interview their “experts” before putting them on their shows.

  • Jeffree

    @Julie: (#10):
    What statement on Sarah’s blog or TV interview made you think she “believed the myth” about “feminine tendencies” being linked with gayness?

    That was the implied “concern” of the other mothers, NOT her. That was the assumption of the “psychologist”, NOT Sarah.

    You might want to (re)read the original post and the CNN transcripts and stop interpreting her worries in terms of those of other people, possibly including yourself.

    And you’re right—CNN needs to get a more qualified psychologist!—one with some basic training in how children develop their identities.

  • Jim in St Louis

    Good Luck Kiddo, with a lousy Mother like this you are going to have lots of grief in your life. What kind of a sicko puts a sexual identity on a 5 year old? 5 Year old kids cannot be gay, they can’t be straight, they can’t be anything except 5 years old. Reading about this bitch’s elaborate stunt to bring some drama into HER life made me think about that illness where the parent would poison their own kids in order to get sympathy- Muchhausen syndrome or something like that. Poor kid.

  • Jeffree

    @Jim in St Louis: (#10):
    Good luck Jim. With reading comprehension difficulties such as yours, you may have a rough time maintaining steady employment. Let me help you gain some clarity.

    The mom didn’t “put a sexual identity “on her son. If you’d read past the first 3 words of her blog post and you would realize that. Her first paragraph has a few sentences in it, but
    if you sound out the words slowly, you just may be able to get the gist of it.

    Imagine how much you would learn and know if you actually read the *whole* article! That’s a BIG step, Jim, but give it a try.

    Here’s a hint: before straining your brain commenting publicly, you might try to read past the headline. Good luck with that!

    P.s. Your local school district may offer free or low-cost tutoring to assist with your reading difficulties. Don’t be ashamed to ask for help.

  • Jim in St Louis

    Thanks Jefree for working that bitchy gay man sterotype right into the ground. (omg! you are sooooooo 80’s!) The fact is the bitch mom IS forcing her kid into uncomfortable positions and then posting to the world how wonderful and brave SHE is for standing up to those horrible gay bashers. I’d suggest that you follow the link and read her actual posting. She is saying her son is Gay, the whole point is she thinks her son is gay and that she is so proud of him for being gay. Quit making children into sexual beings you fraking pervert.

  • Jonathan

    She should have had him dress up as Velma instead!

  • Gene

    I had a friend who dressed up as a girl (just generic girl, not a character) in grade six. It helped he had a lithe body and somewhat effeminate face. Also, we were in a Catholic School, but not only did that not stop him, he also received compliments from the faculty.

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