NAMING RIGHTS

We Need A “Santorum”-Style Nickname For Antonin Scalia

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia nauseated millions of LGBT Americans and their allies on Monday, when he defended laws banning sodomy and compared them to laws against murder and bestiality.

On Twitter, Zombie Broder put the call out and asked Dan Savage and others to help come up with an alternate meaning for “Scalia,” akin to the definition of Santorum that dogged Rick Santorum throughout his presidential campaign.

Several, ahem, original suggestions have been tweeted already,  but we thought we’d get some input from the very pithy Queerty readership.

So, what’s a “Scalia”? Share your ideas in the comments—and tweet them to us at @queerty

 

Get Queerty Daily

Subscribe to Queerty for a daily dose of #politics #antoninscalia #gayrights stories and more

28 Comments

  • tdx3fan

    A large amount of white vaginal discharge, similar to yeast but more viscous, that comes from the vagina.

  • Thomathy

    Easy.

    Scalia (n.) – The dry skin of the foreskin, that may flake, which results from excessive, dry masturbation particularly in arid climes or during dryer seasons.

  • Caleb in SC

    Scalia (v.) – To fuck someone up the ass without the courtesy of a reach around. E.g., My date last night totally scalia’ed me so I had to toss one off after he left.

    It’s about time this expression was reduced to a single term.

  • QJ201

    Scalia: That burning sensation on your shaft or anus from not using enough lube, see spit f*ck.

    Or maybe that’s it Scalia = spit f*cking.

  • 2eo

    C*nt

    Works on so many levels.

  • seniceguy64

    Scalia = dried semen found on pubic hair or other hairy areas of the body

  • hyhybt

    don’t know, the Santorum thing seems to me only to work well because it’s unique.

  • MACDONALDBANK

    LUNATIC …!

    Being black, left-handed or being gay is just as natural. It is a sometimes rare occurrence to fall in Love and to hold that person in your heart and be loved in return … it is something that should be celebrated! If it’s between two guys or two girls — all the better. It takes even more courage to defend that LOVE!

    The evil writings in Leviticus 18:22 … against gays – depict: “P” … “priestly rules” & expanded by the pope; homophobes and religious frauds … to attack the gay community and never meant to apply to the public — but to priests.

    There is no scientific evidence to prove any of the cross related bogus elements of christianity and other religions. Our early human ancestors; on this earth … go back more than 6 million years … 5,996,000 years before the Greeks, Romans and the Jews. Christianity is basically a 2012 year old fictional cult.
    In the year 300 AD when Emperor Constantine, who to some was the first pope; went on to fabricate & market Christianity!
    Christianity is a fantasy; which turned out to be one of the most hateful & evil concoctions ever perpetrated on the world.

    It is written; so therefore it shall be? We are the chosen people? Such a wicked fantasy. To see the religious lunatics manipulate government and our lives is shameful.

    The pope and churches fully aware that Leviticus 18:22 applies to priests only … refuse to remove this stigma … maliciously persecuting gays. Kids are being bullied into suicide …!

  • Chandler in Las Vegas

    I like one of the original suggestions for santorum: Farting in the face of someone who’s rimming you? That even SOUNDS like Scalia. As in: twink was cute, nice hole and all, but you don’t Scalia me twice.

  • CAxlRose

    Scalia (n.) – The foul-tasting mix of smegma and semen that often results from performing fellatio on unwashed and uncircumcised men.

  • MarvelUs

    Scalia airs his prejudices quite often; he is the “Pig of Scotus”.

  • RandallSM

    Scalia (n.) – Canker sore received from dining in a dirty kitchen.

  • SOCALBOY122162

    Stronzo! It means little shit in Italian.

  • SOCALBOY122162

    ‘ulcera orale’ = Canker sore in Italian

  • SOCALBOY122162

    Il fallo-degustazione mix di smegma e sperma che spesso deriva da eseguire fellatio su sbiadito e uomini non circoncisi.

  • David Gervais

    Definitely an itchy scaly skin disease, as in:
    I’m not hitting that, he looks like he has scalia.
    See him scratching himself? Watch out for scalia on his balls.

  • ronsfo

    This might work. Eczema Psoriasis & Scalia.

  • jpcflyer

    I was going to suggest the rash caused by a pubic lice infestation. Some sort of skin disease just fits. But smegma + semen is hard to resist.
    Any doubt how he would have voted in the Loving case ? Ask Clarence Thomas.

  • balehead

    Scaliatosis….the smell of someone doing wrong to LGBT individuals?…Definitely can be an epidemic….among Republicans…

  • Mike

    the little flecks of shit left around the mouth after eating a dirty asshole or similar stuff after saying a load of bullshit

  • Joel J

    @Mike: Yuk!

  • DirtyOleMan

    This is GROSS! :)

  • Bill

    I think a Scalia is when someone cums in your mouth without any warning at all and they keep trying to deep throat

  • 1EqualityUSA

    Boys, boys, this was not your finest hour. Anger has a way of bringing out baser instincts in the oppressed. Keep the rudder in these choppy waters and stay above the fray. Scalia annoys me fiercely, but this falls below standards. Unedifying. This narrative will serve only to harm us. We’re being treated as though we don’t deserve equal footing in society. The above comments allow those who feel this way to be justified in their views. Freedom of speech is important, but so is being gentlemen. You’re better than this.

  • David

    Scalia: (verb) the cut, wound, or abrasion one gets on their penis when masturbating too vigorously, or without lubrication. “I jerked off too much yesterday. Now I have a scalia on my dick.”

  • RandallSM

    Looks like 1EqualityUSA’s scalia’s actin’ up.

  • NormdePlume

    Scalia: (noun) – the seepage from a ruptured anal wart. See also: chief asshole of the USA.

  • hyhybt

    Something to remember: just because he’s unjustly unfavorable to this cause doesn’t mean he’s always wrong, any more than anyone else. His dissent in the eminent domain case a few years ago even went against big business.

Comments are closed.