If you are wondering which side is the gay piercing left or right, then, to make a long story short, getting pierced in your right ear meant you were gay. But there is so much more to this “gay piercing” than just which side is the gay side and which one is the side for straight men.
There is a rich history of jewelry being used to show off wealth, nobility, or status. In the 20th century, it was used to show off sexual preference. A man would wear a single earring in his right ear to say he was a gay man.
In this article, we will go into why that was a problem, how that affected LGBTQ youth, and what’s been happening since. Join us in unpacking this old gay stereotype and ask the question: do we still need it?
A Short History Of Piercing
Since ancient times, people have been getting body piercings to show status or caste. Adornments like facial piercings and other jewelry were common. Through the centuries, the popularity of ear piercing has come in waves. Egyptian mummies have pierced ears. In the 1500s in Europe, it was common to see a wealthy man dripping with jewelry and it was fashionable for them to wear a single pearl earring hanging from one ear.
Ear piercings fell out of favor in the 1920s in the USA. From the 1920s to the 1950s facial piercings were uncommon, gay ears or not. Even for women, the fashion was to wear clip-on earrings. But then, in the 1970s, more and more people were getting their ears pierced. Rock stars made the look appealing and more people got multiple piercings.
At some point gay men started to use piercings to signal to other men they were homosexual. Which side was the gay earring? Well, if you were a heterosexual guy and you wanted to pierce an ear, it always had to be the left ear because the right ear was the gay ear. And so the “gay piercing” was born – more than any body piercing, the gay ear piercing was the best way to tell if someone was playing for your team.
Being Gay In The Twentieth Century
While there were out gay people around this time, it was a lot less common and acceptable as it is now. There were no protections for homosexuals and they were often physically attacked just for being who they were.
LGBTQ life was still underground in secret bars and clandestine meetings in local parks in the 1970s when piercings started to come back into style. Secrecy led to an increased need for discrete signaling. That’s when the gay ear piercing started to become a popular method of letting those in the know know.
The Effects of The Gay Ear
Around the late 1970s, it became common for men to secretly communicate their sexuality by wearing an earring in their right ear. By the 90s, It had become so widely accepted as a secret code that there was an article about it in the New York Times. After that, there weren’t many questions about which ear is the gay ear. Left ear for straight men, right ear for gay men, the publication had spoken.
“Left Is Right, Right Is Wrong.”
There was a saying around the playground that was so popular everyone seemed to know it. It meant that anyone getting one piercing (usually a boy because girls got both ears pierced) would have to get a left ear piercing because the right ear meant that you were gay – and being gay was wrong.
It’s unfortunately exactly the worst message we want to send to LGBTQ youth. The phrase is widely known in the US. It’s repeated everywhere from Florida to Oregon, it’s not clear how it started or how the phrase spread but it’s well-known enough to do some damage to LGBTQ youth.
Nowadays, the original phrase is no longer as prevalent but it still might come up from time to time with boys getting a piercing in the right ear. It’s likely many kids suffered at the hands of bullies because of this common saying just because they accidentally got “the gay ear” pierced.
Creating Gay Symbols
Unlike other marginalized groups being gay is something you realize slowly. It’s not something that you can tell about a person from their physical appearance. To communicate your sexuality you have to tell people. Now, what happens when it becomes unacceptable to tell people?
The gay ear was a nice subtle way to signal to other men that you were looking for men. But the problem was that it became too recognizable that it started to create problems for men who identified as homosexuals.
Sayings like “left is right, right is wrong” make it clear that being gay was considered something to be ashamed of and many LGBTQ youth were bullied for getting a piercing in “the gay ear.”
Has It Gotten Better?
There is good news. It’s no longer as dangerous to be out as a homosexual in the United States, so it’s no longer as important to know which ear is the gay ear. You don’t need something as subtle as a piercing, there are other ways to signal now – like telling someone you are gay or buying another man a drink.
In fact now, you can just hop on dating apps and find other men who are looking for men in your vicinity. The internet has made finding our tribes a lot easier.
In the years before the internet, it was much harder to connect to anyone. Most homosexuals needed signaling to quietly show off their pride. But these days they can just be themselves without as much fear of retribution.
Conclusion
These days it doesn’t matter which ear is the gay ear in the US. The “Gay ear” has fallen out of favor for a more open-minded approach to piercings. Pretty much anyone can have them these days as long as they are appropriate for the situation.
Now it’s also much easier to know when someone is gay or straight because you can just ask them. It’s no longer taboo to talk about it. It might be a little awkward but it’s far better than how things used to be.
Since it’s no longer as much of a taboo to be gay and out and proud the need for such discreet signaling has been turned out on its ear. So what side is the gay side the right side or the left? It doesn’t matter anymore.
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Jim
I remember when I got my ear pierced in college in the early ’70’s discussing this with friends (I was either going to get my ear pierced or a tattoo. I decided on a piercing because a tattoo was forever. I good call.)
This was in mid-America near St. Louis. We decided that it depended what side of the Mississippi, you were on. I can’t remember which was which but decided to pierce my left ear.
So now I know why I had such a poor sex life at that time in my life. LOL
SamB
It was such a secret that everyone knew about it. Great article.
Dunnedin
I remember either “Ask Ann Landers” or “Dear Abby” getting this question and the response was: If your left ear is pierced, you’re straight; if your right ear is pierced, you’re gay; if both ears are pierced, you’re a girl. Ah, how times have changed. There was also a response on one of them that after 30, men with long hair look like their mother. Nope. Mom wasn’t bald on top.
lmdoane55
I couldn’t decide which one to pierce so I had both done in 1971 which garnered quite a bit of attention from both my gay and straight friends…
2paddlecanoe
But the question is, why did gay men decide to pierce their ears? It came from sailors who sailed halfway or totally around the world. Sailors were away from home a long time and away from women and thus were known to play with men. Gay men would go to piers everywhere including in Boston, NY, San Francisco and pick up sailors for “a price” – $ or booze. Per a historian at the oldest maritime history museum in the USA, here in Salem MA, a sailor wore jewelry to communicate with other sailors: a gold loop in the Left ear meant that the sailor had sailed halfway round the world, the Western Hemisphere, had sailed around Cape Horn, so all of North and South America. If a sailor had an earring in the right ear, he was from Europe or more Eastern hemisphere and had sailed around The South African Cape. The sailor with earrings in both ears, had sailed around the world, was rarely in one port long, and probably had a lot of quick sex with men because with women, required courting, time and other formalities. Gay men picked up on this fashion of communication. Upon my growing up in eastern MA, in the 1960’s and early 70’s, the earring in the left ear, was the signal for being a gay man, and the right ear had not come into fashion yet. We used this earring fashion sense, hankies in the pocket, tight(particularly in the crotch) jeans, the wearing of keys on the belt line and a few other clues, that we were encountering a gay person.
Joshooeerr
Maybe the ear code was once widely understood in the US, but around the rest of the world it seems to have been mainly a source of confusion. When many of my (gay) friends began having their ears pierced in the 70s and 80s it was purely a fashion choice, and the notion that one side or the other sent a signal seemed largely a myth. There would often be some discussion about which was “the gay side”, but most guys didn’t know and didn’t much care. By the 90s many were getting both ears pierced and the subject hardly ever came up.
winemaker
A very interesting article on ear piercing to say the least. That said after many years of off and on thinking about it, on a whim, I had this done about 3 years ago after acquiring a pair of ancient Roman gold earrings from the 1st century BC / AD in an on line auction. I was worried of peoples reaction as I ‘m a bit conservative but after a few life changing experiences over the last few years I gave up worrying or giving a rats tukus about what other people thought. I’ve had the same tiny studs in since I had this done yet I’m still a bit concerned about putting the ancient Roman earrings in albeit they’re not flashy or large as I don’t like wearing anything that would bring on unwanted attention or bias. These ancient Roman gold earrings are approximately 22 karat gold thus relatively soft and weren’t alloyed with any other metal to harden them like the gold jewellery of today.
linedrive
I bet you look very sexy wearing them. I love earrings on a guy–both ears.
emarell9
Ah the good old days. I’d forgotten how much confusion reigned during my gay youth, what with the pierced ears, the hankies – which side? what color? – and most intimidating of all, the keys. Why, the jangle of approaching keys could obliterate all other judgments brewing in one’s brain. Then in the 1980s along came HIV+/HIV-, and those earlier preoccupations faded into the background.
Note to editors: “discrete” means “separate; distinct” – not the word you wanted here. But “discreet” means “hidden; toned down.” Annoying, I know.
radiooutmike
My best friend in high school got his ear pierced our sophomore year in college.
He made sure to get his left ear pierced. It was right around then I started to get International Male catalogs unsolicited.
linedrive
God, those were great catalogues. Undergear, too.
tckokla711
Wow…awesome article. I had a very similar journey when I was in my early 20’s, about 30 years ago.
Back the, I was a really shy, dorky dude in my early 20’s. I usually wore a polo shirt, jeans & Cole Haan loafers. i had this really cool neighbor dude that always looked really cool,. He usually wore a solid t-shirts, jeans & black Converse All Stars & a silver hoop earring in his left ear, that I could not stop staring at.
We started hanging out all the time. Then over the next few months, we grew even closer & eventually hooking up. My style then totally morphed with him. Within six months, I only wore solid v-neck t-shirts, jeans & Converse All Stars, I even pierced my left ear.. it lasted two fantastic years.
I later got married, had a son stopped thinking about that time. Until a few months, when my shy & newly teenage son decided he wanted to get his ear pierced. Talk about a full circle moment, I totally told him yes. He now has a really cool earring in his left ear..
.
tckokla711
Wow…awesome article. I had a very similar journey when I was in my early 20’s, about 30 years ago.
Back the, I was a really shy, dorky dude in my early 20’s. I usually wore a polo shirt, jeans & Cole Haan loafers. i had this really cool neighbor dude that always looked really cool,. He usually only wore solid t-shirts, jeans & black Converse All Stars & had a silver hoop earring in his left ear, that I could not stop staring at..
We started hanging out all the time. & then over the next few months, we grew even closer & eventually hooking up. My style eventually morphed with him. Within six months, I was only wearing solid v-neck t-shirts, jeans & Converse All Stars, i even pierced my left ear.. it lasted two fantastic years.
I later got married, had a son stopped thinking about that time. Until a few months, when my shy & newly teenage son decided he wanted to get his ear pierced. Talk about a full circle moment, I totally told him yes. He now has a really cool earring in his left ear..
.