backstage pass

David Burtka on giving gay daddy vibes, beer funnels, and wearing a harness

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David Burtka and Neil Patrick Harris attend the 16th annual God’s Love We Deliver Golden Heart Awards at The Glasshouse on October 17, 2022.

Despite raising two children with hubbie Neil Patrick Harris, David Burtka isn’t kidding around.

The year is shaping up to be one of his biggest ever as Burtka returns to the stage in the Off-Broadway revival of God of Carnage and as executive producer and co-creator of Hulu’s faux cooking competition, Drag Me to Dinner.

Yasmina Reza’s Tony Award-winning play follows two couples who convene one evening in their bougie Brooklyn neighborhood to discuss a playground incident involving their kids. After kicking back a few cocktails, things turn ugly as they argue about everything from homophobia to racial issues, offering Burtka the chance to shed (at least onstage) his nice guy persona.

And on May 31, Drag Me to Dinner gathers 40 of our favorite drag queens — including Queerties BADASS award-winner Jinx Monsoon, Alaska, and BenDeLaCreme — for a multi-course takedown of our favorite reality competitions. Burtka, who studied culinary arts at Pasadena’s Le Cordon Bleu, developed the project with Harris, utilizing his multi-hyphenate skill set as chef, actor, and writer.

Related:

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A great pop philosopher once said, “Don’t be a drag, just be a queen.” But man is it hard to be a queen in 2023! 

Queerty caught up with Burtka in between performances for a behind-the-scenes look at his latest projects and why he loves being a gay daddy.

David Burtka
David Burtka

This production of God of Carnage is presented by Theater Breaking Through Barriers, which
spotlights people onstage and backstage with disabilities. One of the most valuable lessons
I’ve learned from this experience is…

The importance of having more people with disabilities on stage and backstage! Representation is so important. Audience members with disabilities deserve to see themselves on the stage. They’re completely capable of being up there themselves one day, and I hope this show reinforces that.

The Off-Broadway cast of God of Carnage
(l-r) Christiane Noll, Gabe Fazio, David Burtka, and Carey Cox in ‘God of Carnage.’ Photo by Carol Rosegg

The biggest difference in parenting between me and my character, Alan, is…

The biggest difference between me and my character Alan is that I care about my kids. Alan predominantly cares about his job and is quite a narcissist. He passes on generational effects to the people in his life, and that’s something I definitely try to not do. I feel like I am a really good parent, and my kids have my attention 150 percent!

There’s a famously explosive vomit scene in the play. I know from experience: never mix
________ with ___________… 

Bad oysters and beer funnels. Yeah… that happened on spring break once, and it was not fun.

My biggest onstage mishap happened when I…

When I was 12 years old, I was in a production at the Marquis Theater, and my harness broke, and I fell 15 feet. I landed on my face during a show and beat the curtain down. They had to take me through the audience because the gurney couldn’t fit through the backstage door. Probably my biggest mishap.

God of Carnage might give parenting a bad name, but the best part of being a gay daddy is…

That you can vacillate between the masculine and the feminine. I think a lot of men — dads in general — play the “masculine” role, the “man” role, and I love that I’m a dad who doesn’t have to play that “masculine” role all the time. Another great part of being a gay daddy is giving them great fashion tips. It’s really fun to go shopping for their clothes.

The show that changed my life is…
The first ever Broadway show I saw was Jerome Robbins’ Broadway. I sat in the front row of the
mezzanine, and I knew right then and there that I needed to do a Broadway show. From there, I started doing many of the shows that were represented, including West Side Story (three times) and most of their original choreography. That was the turning point in my life where I knew I had to dance on Broadway.

The LGBTQ+ person I’d love to collaborate with (besides my husband)…

Mike White! He’s doing it right. The White Lotus is soo phenomenal. His writing is so brilliant. The
complexity in the characters is just so great. And who wouldn’t want to go to an awesome area to film? It would be a dream come true to work with him.

A semi-spoiler moment from Drag Me to Dinner that you won’t want to miss involves…

My Aunt Sue. She’s in the show, and she’s quite the character. You don’t want to miss what she cooks in the show.

I’ve been vocalizing! Revive _________ so I can star in it!

Kiss of the Spider Woman. I would love to play the role of Molina [a gay window dresser]. It’s just so brilliant and a dream of mine.

The gayest thing about me…

My vast knowledge of musical theater. Being a musical theater major, I know every musical that’s been on Broadway, including the year it was made, the composer, and the songs.

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