Turns out, men love cuddling with other men, regardless of sexuality. A British study published in 2014 found that nearly 93 percent of college men said they shared a bed with another guy, and as we’ve previously reported, some straight guys even seek out therapeutic cuddle groups with other men.
Need other anecdotal evidence? After one Reddit user asked the users of r/askgaybros if they’ve ever cuddled or shared a bed with an attractive straight friend, many commenters related experiences of snuggling and spooning their hetero brethren. (One user, however, called out the subreddit’s “fetishism for straight men,” calling it “unfathomable to most.”) Below, edited for clarity and relative SFW-ness, are highlights from the thread.
Related: Lonesome straight guy wonders if gay guys ever cuddle with hetero pals
“One time, there were four of us at a friend’s house with three beds. Among us three visitors, one knew I was gay, the other didn’t. He invited me to share with him, which was nice and made the situation less awkward. I got in bed and tried to distance myself as much as possible. In the morning, he woke up first and started poking/tickling me in my butt/back/belly/feet to try to gradually wake me up. I liked it, though, and pretended not to notice as long as possible so he wouldn’t stop. I also tried to hide my growing boner as he was doing it lol. He was a little cute, and if he liked guys, I would date him, but our next stop was his girlfriend’s apartment, so that was the last time. But I still remember enjoying it.”
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“I went to a weekend conference once in college before I realized I wasn’t straight, and we had to share beds at the hotel. There were two beds and four dudes to a room. I hadn’t really talked much to the guy I ended up sharing a bed with beforehand — it was a big group — but I thought he was pretty good-looking (because all ‘straight’ guys think about that). So, we put the heavy top blanket between us as a divider before sleeping. The other two in the room woke up first and told us that by morning that blanket was on the floor, I was big spoon he was little spoon, sound asleep. I was the last one up, so I don’t know what his reaction was, but even though we hung out some the previous day, we didn’t that day, and it was the last [day] of the trip.”
“As a marine during combat training, we used to sleep outside in the field, and it would get super cold. The only way to warm up would be to share a sleeping system/mosquito bag or cuddle up in a pile. Never thought anything sexual about it, even though we would play grab-ass. I saw them as brothers. But before this, in high school, I shared a bed with my best friend every day because we basically lived together, and he was mostly straight, but one day things got pretty gay, and we f*cked.”
“As a teen, I would sleep in the same bed with different friends if I stayed over. One time one of them reached over and put his arm over me and grabbed me. I was too scared to do anything, so I just pretended to be asleep. He eventually moved it. Not sure if he was ever curious or not, but he went on to have two kids, and he seems to only be into women as far as I can tell. As an adult, I sleep on my friend’s bed when I go visit him. He knows I’m gay and is really comfortable. I don’t see him that way, so it’s just two friends sharing a bed.”
“I’ve shared a bed with friends, one I thought was attractive. No cuddling or spooning though with any of them. My friend group’s masculinity is way too fragile. Plus, I wake up with morning wood almost every day, so I likely would distance myself/sleep on the edge of the bed with my back turned to the other guy and never dare sleep in my boxers in that kind of situation.”
Related: New study finds straight dudes in bromances often hug, kiss, and share their most intimate secrets
“I was on a competition trip in college, and our hotel arrangement was four guys in one room. They were all straight, and it was assumed I was at the time because this was long before I’d crack the closet door. One of them was a marine guy. The other three guys decide to immediately strip to their undies in the hotel room, and I follow (and then get under the covers to hide my boner). The marine guy and his buddy shared a bed, and then it was me and this stranger who wasn’t bad-looking himself. We never intentionally cuddle, but we end up back to back in the middle of the night. Other than that, I had a couple of best friends when I lived in Oklahoma. Of my two ‘straight’ friends when I lived in Oklahoma, both were bi but extremely uncomfortable with their sexuality, and we never did anything. One of them I could at least share a bed with, but we’d never cuddle, and we’d always wear clothes. The other had too much internalized homophobia to even share a bed. He never came out to me, but I knew he was bi or gay because of something I saw in his Internet history and various things he’d bring up that hinted he knew something of gay culture and then later deny he ever brought it up.”
“I did once. My best friend, who is straight, and I went overnight hiking in the Smoky Mountains. It got a lot colder than we expected or prepared for. In the middle of the night, we were freezing, painfully cold, and our teeth literally chattered. So, he suggested we cuddle up together, and we did. We cuddled as close and tight as we could until morning. Being as gay as I am, I did get a hard-on, as much as I tried not to. He didn’t notice, I don’t think. … We love each other like brothers or more, and I never felt so close to anyone, even with no sex.”
“Sharing beds many times, with multiple different guys in our friend group, full on spooning only once. We’re all very rational and supportive of each other, so when it makes sense to share a bed it happens, and I don’t overthink it.”
Chrisk
Dan has apparently taken on the straight guy fetish responsibilities. Graham must be on vacation or something.
sfhairy
Haha, wow, another BS article. Did Dan takeover for Graham?
WashDrySpin
Queerty is NOT about writing stories…they are about cashing in on advertisement dollars…that is why I use Ad Blocker…
Donston
Identity and sexual politics have come back to bite us. Now people (particularly on the Internet) are using them to troll or for click-bait or for attention or for fantasy for ego.
I got to the point of no longer caring whether someone is “straight” or “gay” or “bi” or “pan” or whatever. I just accepted that everyone has their own thing going on and their own journey. While the gender, romantic, sexual, emotional, commitment spectrum is wide and varied (redundant, I know).
However, if everyone saw things that way then people on social media and sites like these wouldn’t be able to use sexuality or “labels” to segregate or intimidate or for fantasy or clicks or money. Because of those shady intentions, we’ll never fully evolve.
Donston
You guys had to reach back to 2014 for this “article”? Once again, the issue is that Queerty is not interested in examining the nuances of identities, paraphiliacs/fetishes, sexuality, gender, emotions, orientation, sociology. It’s only interested in using “labels” for sensationalism and click bait.
What’s really bad is that this site has decided that it doesn’t care about the “gays’ are obsessed with ‘straights” narrative. They’re just doing whatever for money, clicks and comments no matter how detrimental. It’s obvious that when they put “straight” in a headline it gets more views and comments than a typical article. It’s time for everyone to decide not to click or comment.
This site has gone from being silly and shallow to actively problematic.
michel_banen
I don’t get the obsession about “straight guys” on a gay page. Straight guys are straight and therefore about as attractive to me as women; nice to look at but nothing more.
esrosejr
I lived a straight life for a long time. My best friend(s) during this time were all straight or so I thought. We would stay over at each others’ house even when there was only a short distance. We always ended up cuddling and occasionally sexed up with each other. Later, I came out and the old friends faded away. The new friends, gay to the max, occasionally slept over and we were always hyper aware of space and, finally my point, cuddling. Holding each other with morning wood was not a threat. It was normal. Getting stimulated with cuddling was a familiar thing for gay guys. Kind of sweet when we just let it be that. And so on. Hyper sensitivity is a cuddling killer. Enjoy it. It is a sweet moment with another man gay or straight.
BoylesqueBubble
This is so phucking pathetic of this website. Daily posts of this garbage. Now Dan is writing this crap. Is this ALL you editors think about?
Josh447
The phenomenon of get the straight guy is nothing new, it’s just more exaggerated now since the legalization of gay marriage, more openness etc. This is natural for some to get the hot straight guy now that he is more vulnerable. Men like a challenge. And that’s a serious challenge. I think it’s cool and part and parcel to the evolution of sexual openness. Ads or not it’s still in the mass consciousness to explore, everything.
Is it really that distasteful to inform the hunky straight high school or college quarterback through sexual advance that he may not be as hetero as he thought? That he likes licking the tight ends azs, or sucking the linebackers cck or tonguing the towel boys balls?
Guys who go for straight guys do us a great service. They get them to think outside the box and consider other possibilities.
You really can’t buck nature. It’s a bit useless so why even try.
My2CentsWorth
This is a good comment: “They get them to think outside the box and consider other possibilities.”
Donston
A “queer” site should not be saturated with articles every day about “straight” guys. If people want that then they should go to specific forums or look to porn for that type of shit. It should not represent around 35% of a “queer” publications articles. While almost none of those articles include an exploration of identity, questioning, experimentation, sexuality, the orientation spectrum. They’re just using “straightness” as click-bait and for fantasy, and they’re pilfering Reddit threads to fill up their ad requirements. It’s lazy, redundant and cheap. Period.
While you need to pick a side, Josh. One post you’re pushing identity politics. You’re talking about stuff being genetic and people being born a certain way and saying that conversation about fluidity and the orientation spectrum are pointless. Then the next post, you’re hyping up experimentation and hyping up trying to get “straight” guys. Which one is it? One post you’re talking about people should do what they want and be themselves. But the next post you’re shading and being dismissive towards non-binary people and effeminate males. Which one is it?
It seems as if you only like to indulge conversations about “nuance” if it’s about “straight” or hetero-leaning hooking up with dudes, if it indulges your fantasies, if it makes you feel good about yourself, if it promote your personal politics. Other than that, you’re constantly talking about how we need to keep it simple and straightforward and depend on identity politics You’re transparent as fvck, and your hypocrisy knows no bounds.
Donston
Also, if you’re gonna use “straight” as click-bait and fantasy, at least look at the whole picture. Explore how the “straight guy” obsession can be debilitating, how being obsessed with “turning” a straight guy has kept many dudes from entering healthy relationships and how it can keep dudes forever going after people who don’t genuinely want them. Talk about how being obsessed with “straight guys” and wanting to be accepted by them and fit in with them can trigger gay insecurities or internalized homophobia or toxic masculinity. Talk about how it can assist in guys remaining closeted.
If you’re gonna beat a specific topic to death, at least explore the in and outs of it. Queerty’s approach is entirely shallow, sensationalistic and driven by fantasy. That’s what makes it so tiresome and problematic.
My2CentsWorth
Queerty should not be pushing fiction if these are fiction. Maybe Queerty should create a fiction section and publish the best fiction.
Cam
Another “Straight guy” fetish article. Yawn