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Is Gay CGI Porn a Viable Niche Industry? Or Destined to Fail?

It’s one thing for Hollywood to barrage movie theater-going audiences with a slate of 3-D films, and ESPN to launch a channel devoted to 3-D sports coverage, and the Grammys to present a Michael Jackson tribute in 3-D. But one thing we’re not sure we can deal with is the coming onslaught gay porn starring no real performers — just computer creations. Adult Source Media’s CGI film Pirate’s Booty — a Disney parody, because all porn flicks must have roots in mainstream culture — took 10 months and hundreds of thousands of dollars to produce, with the hands of veteran CGI experts, sixty minutes worth of pixel screwing.

“As someone who shoots live-action porn, I know how much of a struggle it is to get good penetration shots without shoving a light up someone’s ass or otherwise ruining the mood,” writes Todd Klinck. “In Pirate’s Booty, the angles are flawless. Every ass fuck is perfectly captured. While the bottom is getting pounded, his cock jiggles up and down hyper-realistically. There’s comedy in this movie, but it’s no art film. [Director Wendy] Crawford wastes no time on silly plot structures and gets right to the action. The star of the movie is Captain Jack Swallows, who loves sodomizing his little blond, straight cabin boy.”

ASM also produced a Roman era title, Tales From the Gods, with computer-generated performers getting in on the gladiator arena, and emperors being serviced by peasants.

The upside to this CGI trend? No budget necessary for condoms and lube.

But it’s hard to believe the business sense in spending more money to produce a single gay porn flick that’s easily, ahem, pirated on BitTorrent. Especially in an industry that’s already hurting bad.

The only surefire way to turn CGI porn into a success? Have a a few celebs take up Klinck’s proposition, and let porn studies license their names. With a few clicks of the mouse, editors can swap in famous famous and presto, you’ve got David Beckham getting pounded by Ryan Gosling. We’d buy that. Or at least pirate it.

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