Some major metropolitan cities in the U.S. have jerk off clubs where men of all sorts can bond through their shared love of masturbation. These are different from bathhouses in that oral and anal sex arenât allowed, and as GQ recently explained, more and more straight guys are seeking out these clubs as a way to anonymously bond with men and explore their bodies and sexuality without âcheatingâ or getting too gay.
An annual survey conducted by Seattleâs Rain City Jacks jerk-off club concluded that roughly 10 percent of its approximately 300 members self-identify as heterosexual. (Roughly 25 percent identify as bisexual.) An informal study of Bateworld.com, a website known as âFacebook for masturbators,â estimated that 15 to 30% of its users probably identify as straight too.
Related:Â This informal study of straight men who masturbate together reached some stimulating conclusions
But why would straight guys want to masturbate with other men? Rain City Jacks founder and organizer Paul Rosenberg explains to GQ:
How about we take this to the next level?
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âYou can sometimes tell a guy is straight because heâs not interested in kissing another guy. Itâs easy for him to focus on the penis, but not to be physically affectionate.
The straight men Iâve played with at my club want to evangelize it to other straight guys, because they enjoy it so much and they donât feel threatened by it. They may feel no romantic attraction to other men, but weâve given them a green light to experiment: to touch another manâs penis, to share pleasure with each other.
One of the terms I hear a lot is that this is the ultimate form of male bonding.â
While weâre rolling our eyes at trying to make all-male jerk-off clubs seem ultra macho by being the âultimate form of male bondingâ (ugh), Rosenberg also thinks that jerk-off clubs allow straight men to affectionately bond with other guys in private without the potentially stigmatizing labels of âgayâ or âbi.â
Dr. Jane Ward, author of the 2015 book Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men (a book which helped introduce many to the straight-ish same-sex jerk-off term âbuddy baitingâ), says that some exhibitionistic straight men may enjoy jerking off with other dudes because they may get compliments and validation that female partners donât provide.
Either way, itâs a notable development in a bi-phobic world where âstraightâ men make up all sorts of new wordsâlike âandrophile,â âheteroflexibleâ and âmostly straightââto try and maintain their heterosexual privilege.
iamru2
No straight guys are definitely not doing that!
WindsorOntario
That’s not happening. Or if it is, the kinds of ‘straight men’ in attendance are probably not the kinds of straight men that most gay men have in mind.
isxios
I disagree. Male bonding through sexual acts that don’t involve actual contact is not a new thing. Young men have been known to jerk it together throughout history without having a desire for further contact.
The extreme labels of gay and straight are actually very modern, and they are pruditry at best and soul crushing at their worst.
If these guys were having oral and small sex, I would agree, but masturbation with other men is just not the same thing, and it never had been.
DennisBTR
Double negative – so your sentence really reads – “Straight guys are definitely doing that.”
spacecadet
@DennisBTR: maybe he meant, âNo, straight guys are definitely not doing that!â The comma can make all the difference in the intended meaning of the statement.
docofed
So I want to know where these jo clubs are located. Are there any in the Atlanta area? If so I am down for it.
rvajoclub
I run a JO club in Richmond VA. Everything that was said in this article is true. If youre in my area and are interested, hmu via kik. behold1077 and i can show you.
xanadude
Never make general statements like “No one” would do this or that. That just isn’t true.
Wicked Dickie
‘…more and more straight guys are seeking out these clubs as a way to anonymously bond with men and explore their bodies and sexuality without âcheatingâ or getting too gay….’ It’s a sauna, don’t fool yourself.
@HarryB
Absolutely agree with you
tsw7207
Oh, Goddess forbid… that they “get too gay.” LOL
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
I see a hot guy fully hard jerking it, not so sure I could control my mouth..
:-p
piriblue
What straight guys do not tell is that they get turned on by looking at each others dicks. Sometimes I wonder to myself about guys that are really into porn. What are they really looking at? What is really turning men on. I my life I have seen that straight men get turned on if a guy has a big penis. Another thing that is not talked about is that a lot of those drag queens are doing the topping to a lot of these men. I have been in the gay life, should I say practicing. They have called me gay and all of that bullshit. Late at night the same people have come knocking on my door just to get penetrated. I always say watch those so called best friends. They spend so much time together. You ever wonder why? Secrets men never say or talk about. But they are doing quite a lot. Women just don’t know
Virpilosus
Super interesting comment!
Kangol
Not just drag queens, but there’s a certain portion of the “straight” male population that likes to bottom (oral and anal) for hung, non-GRS* trans women. There’s a whole realm of porn devoted to this: “straight” guys sucking off and getting banged out by well-endowed trans women who have begun hormonal transition (more feminine faces, hairless bodies, breasts, etc.). I mean, whatever floats your boat, but this is one of those areas where the concept of “queerness” seems to be more appropriate that “straight,” “gay” or “bi.”
*genital reassignment surgery
MuslimSlutBox
I’ve lost track of who’s who and who’s got what. Huh?
Aires the Ram
@piriblue: Interesting comments, sounds like the voice of age and experience. Thank You for posting.
Billy Budd
IMHO, labels are useless for day-to-day life. We should not use them. Wanna fuc* a guy? Do it. Wanna fuc* a girl? Do it. In a few decades, these labels will become so complicated and people will be so much freer, that nobody will try to chose a label. Labels will become used solely in the niche of science, and almost everybody will have experiences with both sexes, as it was in ancient Greece and Ancient Rome. We need more freedom.
sfmike64
Back in the early 90s I was part of a group of people that put on jack off parties monthly in Boston. We didn’t ask if guys were gay, straight, bi or otherwise identified. Did you wanna come? Did you behave and not act like a jerk? Then you were invited. Period.
KW1969
Whenever there is an article about straight guys hooking with other guys it seems there are more snarky comments about how it canât be true or that they would most certainly be gay. Menâs sexuality is far more fluid than what most people believe and itâs perfectly normal for them to be open to fooling around.
Doug
There’s also a continuing obsession among gay men about having sex with straight men, and this site frequently panders to it. I think many gay men feel inferior to straight men, and the idea of “conquering” a straight man reverses the power dynamics.
piriblue
I am a gay man that has basically lived in a straight lifestyle. I don’t carry on and feel I carry myself well. This has opened many doors for me as far as meeting men in a straight atmosphere. I met more and better sexual partners in straight bars. They bought me drinks and turned me on to drugs. Gay was never discussed. We enjoyed our company together and the man to man thing was never discussed it just happened. I don’t think there is such a thing as straight. Things just happen in life and are not discussed they are just part of daily living. When we put labels on things people start to get nervous.
james7
Even straight men will do anything to avoid women.
Alton
LOL!
michel_banen
You sir, win the ‘comment of the day’ award đ
xanadude
Exactly! Maybe they are just more comfortable not having to deal with the drama!
Brian
I had a friend who used to host a few nude pool parties each year. Sometimes so called straight guys would show up and give the whole spiel about nudity and bonding with men and freedom, blah blah blah. Inevitably, by the end of the party theyâd have another guy in their mouth or up their butt. Some guys kept up this charade for years. I mean, if thatâs your thing, I guess go for it. It just seems like an awful lot of effort to go through just to get them some D. Maybe they enjoy the roleplay aspect of it?
JamJewel
Thatâs why sex paraphernalia stores sell so many dildos to straight women: whether with their female companions or otherwise, a lot of men enjoy anal. As more and more gay men become âsides!â ROTFL
ptcruiser13
Male/female… gay/straight/bi even some lesbians… who doesn’t like dick?! Jerking off is often a quick, natural way to get off. Ya can do it alone but isn’t it hotter to do it in the company of another guy (or more)? If a JO club helps, go for it. Forums like this promotes human interaction in a space that’s open and non-judgemental. People need to relax, lose the harmful and puritanical labels.
Pete le meat
Mutual masturbation can be a powerful form of male bonding for men who are attracted to women. Words like “gay” and “straight” are irrelevant and pointless.
Brian
If not “gay,” then the term you’re looking for is “closet-case bisexual.”
surreal33
The “experts” make this way more complicated than it is.
Men are base creatures.
Men want hassle free, no conversation, no effort, sex.
Jerk clubs offer men the opportunity to get off with another guy without
having to disrobe, low std risk, and the chance to see various dicks.
There are more than few men who want to see and touch another man’s penis
however, are repulsed by the idea of kissing, sucking, or intercourse with a man.
Aires the Ram
@ surreal: Your comment, ‘men are base creatures’, want uncomplicated……..” is right on the money.
So many think that if a str8 guy touches just one dick, then he’s full-on “gay”, and if he doesn’t readily admit to it and change his identity, then he’s deemed to be ‘in the closet’. That’s all bull-s&^t. Again, like you said, “Men want hassle free, no conversation, no effort, sex.
Jerk clubs offer men the opportunity to get off with another guy without
having to disrobe, low std risk, and the chance to see various dicks.
There are more than few men who want to see and touch another manâs penis
however, are repulsed by the idea of kissing, sucking, or intercourse with a man.”
@Alton: Yes!! Well said!
Alton
If some guy wants to jerk off in front of me, he can label himself whatever he wants!
Jack Meoff
It’s not so shocking to hear that straight guys want to see other hardons. When you think about it that’s what they are watching when they watch porn. The focus of hetero porn is always the penis. The camera follows it no matter where it is being placed. Try pointing that out to most straight guys and then watch the squirm it’s kind of fun.
GymMan456
Labels are there to announce how do they want to live, and for the many bisexuals they will never be helpful. Bisexual reads like you are never satisfied now, because there is another gender waiting. It also implies faithlessness, and few gets aroused by that, not even the faithless, because in the now, the experience is supposed to be total and full.
michel_banen
Jerking off another guy…. that doesn’t sound as a very straight thing to do to me…..
JamJewel
I knew from jumpstreet – reading the headline – that this was just another gay fantasy actualized…. but if it’s about “compliments and validation,” one has to wonder how many small dicks are in the room!
JamJewel
That’s why sex paraphernalia stores sell so many dildos to straight women: whether with their female companions or otherwise, a lot of men enjoy anal. As more and more gay men become “sides!” ROTFL
Heywood Jablowme
WHAT HAVE YOU PEOPLE DONE WITH GRAHAM GREMORE???
sfhairy
such Fake News!
dbmcvey
Whatever they need to tell themselves.
Pete le meat
If men want to wank, let them wank. Stop imposing your rules on what they should have to call themselves. Gay men can be such rule pushers.
yancha
Welcome to Queerty… Always feeding rape culture…. straight guys really want you dick, No means Yes
Robothedestroyer
Well, unpopular opinion: sexuality is complicated, and men bond through sex gay or straight. I mean there is a reason sex is reffered to as “playing” or “messing around” and for real it’s a lot of fun to bust a nut especilly with somone else helping. If only in that one way they enjoy the company of men who cares! I swear sometimes I feel like the comment sections of these articles police straight dude sexuality as much as Republicans try to police ours.
corestrength
Parks, public toilets, rest stops, bath houses.
Straight married guys have used these places to have sex with men for years.
Big deal if they want to present themselves as straight. Just shows how complicated sexual orientation can be.
Aires the Ram
Bingo!!
Nic1966
Now this is what I have been missing. The thought of group Male Masturbation in a totally STRAIGHT environment. Can I now ‘CUM OUT’ as a totally Straight Man who just finds other males totally erotic and bond with them ? Maybe get a few Phone Numbers as well for some one on one private action. Just to continue to Male Bond in a totally Heterosexual way of course ! Heaven forbid I turn back to Gay again ! đ
car
This i a gay site? How do we know? What makes it gay? Seems everything is made to dull down being gayâis a circle jerk with all men gay? Of course it isâthese are apologist terms and names given to make straight men not feel too bad about their homo tendencies. Look at these commentsâthere is either wishful lust or quaint explanations about sexuality being “fluid”âah huh. Maybe some men can be a gay for a just a little while.
G'0Yveh
It’s a variant of “g0y” identification (spelled w. a zer0) from men who have never heard of “g0ys”.