This just in, folks: Eating too much fast food and not getting enough sleep at night can turn you gay. At least according to a bizarre new study by someone named Rita Strakosha, who claims to hold an MPS in Clinical Psychology from Albanian University.
The study, titled Modern Diet and Stress cause Homosexuality: A hypothesis and a potential therapy, was published on Strakosha’s WordPress page and claims that homosexuality is caused by a person’s diet, mainly fast food consumption.
Strakosha says LGBTQ people report higher rates of “eating large amounts of high glycemic index foods and fat, or eating an imbalanced diet, leaning toward carbohydrates.”
Related: New study reveal the “optimum number of people to have sex with” before you die
“Some studies show an increased rate of obesity among homosexuals,” she adds. “Gay men, lesbian and bisexual women report a higher odds of sugar-sweetened beverage consumption than straight men and women.”
That’s right, folks. According to Strakosha, homosexuality is directly tied to fats, sugars, and alcohol. She also claims cutting these things out from your diet could “decrease and… prevent the return of homosexual attractions.”
Doing so would also have the added benefit of improving one’s sleep. And, as it just so happens, Strakosha claims, sleep deprivation also contributes to homosexuality.
Strakosha recommends that people who want to “stay straight” must “steer clear of food that can be disruptive right before sleep, like heavy or rich foods, fatty or fried meals, spicy dishes, citrus fruits and carbonated drinks.”
For people who have turned gay but would like to become straight again, Strakosha recommends entering “sexual hibernation” through diet change to promote “stimulus extinction.”
“Upon re-wakening of sexual interest, the response to the previous sexual stimuli will not restart at once and at the same level as previously,” Strakosha affirms.
Related: Study: Straight men are more attracted to their own sex after a few drinks
She continues: “Time would be needed to achieve the same level as before hibernation. Discontinuation of hibernation would be an opportune time for sexual orientation change.”
One caveat, Strakosha says, is that “sexual hibernation” might not work for everyone.
“Persons with a longer history of homosexual attractions and those with stronger prenatal or genetic factors would have more difficulty in achieving benefits from this therapy,” she says.
We should probably note that Strakosha’s study is self-published and not peer-reviewed.
Studies have also shown that sleep deprivation and blog trolling make you an asshole.
Dumb bitch hasn’t been around enough gay men apparently. Fat ain’t exactly celebrated. “Some studies” my ass.
I wonder what religious group is behind this. They always are.
Wait… I thought a six pack of beer caused homosexuality.
Touché, my friend.
I eat fast food and don’t sleep at night. The only thing it made me was fat. I was already gay to begin with…
Stay tuned for the lawsuits claiming McDonalds turned someone into a power bottom.
She has it backwards. The reason we’re sleep deprived and resort to fast food is because we of the copious amounts of gay sex we’re having. Who has time for sleep and to eat?
Someone needs to tell dr. Heffa that it isn’t transfats and lack of sleep is the culprit behind turning “perfectly straight ” people gay, according to one of the most respectable doctors at the university of gaytopia United, Dr. Brojob V. Jackson ( V for virtual if you must know) has stated: ” green tea causes the gay gene to vocally take over the brain. It is known as the Broadway effect”.
Hilarious! I love the bouncing hamburgers! Thanks for posting, QUEERTY! Laugh of the day!
Is she going for the Tdrumph who can out-obnoxious whom award? She’s close, but not there yet.
Albania? Oh, OK, Which of Dtrumph’s relatives have “ties” to the huuuuuugely bigly oil, coal and of course GAS resources in Alobania? Well, the orange baboon in the White House certainly has the corner on GAS in the USA. I mean insestinal gas, not the more “natural” gas fuel stuff.
The only “study” here is in that of the absurd.
i’m almost at a loss for words. How utterly ridiculous this is.
Seriously! Where do people come up with this shit? If this were true there would be a hell of a lot more gay people in the world all be it fat ones lol.
Here’s Trump’s secret plan for health care. Publish this study in the US and all those fat Christian fundies will be scared to death of the next hamburger and will slim down, thereby getting healthier.
When you think about it, gay panic is about the only these obese people are ever going to get healthy.
Sad to see so many Very Dumb, Very Stupid non-science people walking amongst us. I’d like to know what you’d eat and how long you’d sleep to become this Stupid?
I am not sure where she gets her information but a “gay lifestyle” is way healthier than a “straight lifestyle”. If anyone is sleep deprived it would be a straight man crying because his 2 week old triplets can’t stop crying. If anyone is eating fast food, it is definitely not gay men. We have to live up to our superficial imageries of perfect bodies. ???
Ah it is self published, not peer reviewed. Lol. Ok then.
WOW. Well, seeing that I now am 73 and grew up without “Fast food” but actually with real food and never felt sleep deprived, I hereby claim this study to be brain deprived and morally depraved.
Wait…I came out while I was in the military, can I claim stress in my military career caused my homosexuality? Can I finally get medical attention from the VA?
“That’s right, folks. According to Strakosha, homosexuality is directly tied to fats, sugars, and alcohol.”
Well then. As someone who keeps their fat and sugar intake (even artaficial sweeteners) on a healthy level (as my mom also did when I was a kid) who is too young for alcohol. (I am 16)
How am I gay according to this weird study…
““steer clear of food that can be disruptive right before sleep, like heavy or rich foods, fatty or fried meals, spicy dishes, citrus fruits and carbonated drinks.” ”
But, I don’t eat anything 2 1/2 hours before sleeping. That is unhealthy in general.
I eat natural fat, as in Real butter, not the vegetable stuff (which I can’t eat anyway due to a very bad allergy to sunflowers.) I rarely eat fried stuff due to the same thing, the only fried thing I eat is occationally home made dimsumums fried in cocunut oil, which I only started doing this year. Spicy dishes? Because Peppers make you gay. #Logic. Citrus Fruits? I am allergic to most Citrus fruits. Crabonated drinks: Not more then once every week for me, can’t drink most of them due to the artificial sweeteners.
““Some studies show an increased rate of obesity among homosexuals,” she adds. “Gay men, lesbian and bisexual women report a higher odds of sugar-sweetened beverage consumption than straight men and women” All that really confirms is the high rate of depression under these people mostly due to public backlash.
This “Study” is not large scale, In fact there isn’t a study at all. She just pieces a bunch of (some of which even very questionable) articles together and drawn a conclusion based on those in a way that can’t even be done. You can’t conclude that because a correlation exists the cause of that correlation is X, instead of for instance A, B, C or Y.
The person who wrote this “study” and has a masters degree in Clinical Psychiatry and a graduate degree in law and is from Albania and works for the Albanian University and the non government National Center for Community Services. She is an experienced environmental lawyer and journalist. Not someone with expertise into anything related to the LGBT+ topic or bodily health which her “Study” is based on. You can basically ignore it.
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