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The A-List: Dallas Recap: “You’re Not Fat, You’re Just Hydrated”

Once again, the onscreen antics of Logo’s The A-List: Dallas have been eclipsed by real-life drama. Castmate Levi Crocker was apparently attacked at a gay bar in Oklahoma City over the weekend. As reported by Queerty, this is the third act of alleged violence against an ALD cast member in two months.

Way on the other end of the spectrum, a snippet of Ashley’s wackadoo photo shoot from last week’s episode was selected for a bit of mockery as the “Clip of the Week” on E!’s The Soup with Joel McHale.

Episode eight of ALD is essentially a placeholder for two storylines running parallel: the first involves Ashley’s well-intentioned but ultimately futile attempts to nudge insecure partyboy and burgeoning alcoholic James towards a healthier lifestyle. The second storyline details the continued entanglement of Chase and Taylor the Terrible, the show’s ostensible villain, as they spar and snap their teeth at each other over the affections of Levi, whose cowboy pheromones are puzzlingly addictive. No real progress is made on either storyline but the internecine warfare is amusing.

The episode opens with Ashley luring Levi on a shopping trip to pick up a pair of cowboy boots, preferably in pink. (It is The A-List: Dallas, after all. Gotta stick to the stereotype.) The shopping was just a pretense to confront the laconic horndog for lying to her about cheating on Taylor with Chase. He shrugs it off, ever conflict-avoidant, and advises her to mind her own business. Levi, that’s not how this process works. You’ve forgotten that you are on a reality-TV show. Levi has been on the receiving end of quite a few of these types of conversations in his life and he just doesn’t care enough to change his behavior. No one else in his orbit seems to notice; perhaps it’s the pheromones.

You have to give Ashley credit for not letting her friends off the hook when they behave badly. Her outmoded notions of what it means to be a gay male can be infuriating, and her ostentatious displays of praise for Jeebus are often annoying. But she clearly does not forgive and forget. She can tell Levi does not take her concerns seriously but gives him another chance anyway. Dare I say it: she turns the other cheek.

On:           Nov 30, 2011
Tagged: , , , , ,
    • TxBorn

      Has anyone else noticed Levi’s “Parkinson’s like” body & facial movements?

      Nov 30, 2011 at 5:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Juan

      Have to admit, this was a boring episode. Pat yourself on the back for struggling out the re-cap. But, if you didn’t recap, I would have been so disappointed. You wit is fab.

      Heard Levi’s bar fight was not due to ALD haters, but Levi haters. They didn’t like his arrogance.

      So sick of Chase, he’s getting fugglier by the scene. His snarling, Taylor-hating is just getting soooooo boring. Man is he jealous of that little twink. In the preview, it looked like Levi was going to kiss Taylor… and why would Taylor want someone that stated many times and ways how he hated him? Of course, we all saw through that, but still – run, Taylor, run! Find another, better storyline and a cowboy with a brain and heart. Chase and Levi deserve each other, leave them to it, that would be the most victorious or revenges.

      Damn this story it’s addicting, as are your recaps.

      Nov 30, 2011 at 7:28 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Casper

      I’ve been reading these since Queerty started re-capping A-List. Gotta say, I feel like Chase is the real villain of the show. Preachy, Witchy and just Gross. He needs to back off from those v-necks and those tacky hair styles.

      Haven’t seen this episode yet ’cause logotv takes it’s time online. But looking forward to it.

      Why is everyone into Levi? He’s chubby and a drunk. And James reminds me of an ex-boyfriend- that guy needs to man up and grow up. I hope these men realize their the main attraction at the zoo, not some interesting ground-breaking tv personality.

      Ashley and Taylor – they’re the only normal ones!!

      Nov 30, 2011 at 10:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • lovesagr8smile

      @TxBorn: I am glad someone else has noticed and said something- I thought I was going crazy. I didnt recognize it as parkisons like, but it certainly is very noticeable, And I know that most take great sport in hating on Levi and everyone else, but I thought it was really sad when he found out his issues with his back I find the dallas show more entertaining than new york

      Nov 30, 2011 at 10:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • lovesagr8smile

      While I am at it- my pet peeve with the show is their use of the word “like” I feel like taking a shot everytime one of them uses it, but I would be tanked 6 minutes into the show

      Dec 1, 2011 at 12:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • timncguy

      @Casper: @Casper: Oh my Casper. Ashley and Taylor are the :normal” ones???? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL No way. All Ashley does is run around sticking her nose in other people’s business. And Taylor, gay republican!!!! Nothing normal about that…..

      Dec 1, 2011 at 12:38 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • shannon


      Dec 1, 2011 at 1:01 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • MKe

      I have no interest in ever watching this show with all the bizarre in-fighting they’ve brought to the gay community. No thanks.

      Dec 1, 2011 at 7:56 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • andy

      Taylor should enjoy the attention while he has it. He’s a cute puppy but he’s going to grow up to be an ugly dog.

      Dec 1, 2011 at 9:55 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Matt

      I really can’t stand James’ facial expressions and mannerisms. Just the way he presents and talks is so…just…annoying!

      Dec 1, 2011 at 9:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Brian Wells

      should read:
      “The speed-dating event arrives[insert comma] and the Compassion 54 guys are crushed when virtually no one attends.”

      Dec 2, 2011 at 1:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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