These Boys Be Cold Bitches!

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“Gay” may have once meant “happy,” but there’s nothing jolly about this collection of crazy queers.

Sure, there are some great homos out there – countless, in fact – but some men loving men made their mark with tooth, nail and pure, unadulterated evil.

Thus, without further ado, we present to you some cold bitches, including this lovely gent: former Polish Prime Minister Jaroslaw Kaczynski. Sure, he’s only “allegedly” gay, but that doesn’t mean he can’t be a nasty queen!

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Andrew Cunanan: Don’t be fooled by his good looks, California-native Andrew Cunanan had a heart of darkness – and a shiny pistol. He used said pistol to murder five people over a four month period in 1997. Cunanan’s most famous victim, of course, was fashion designer Gianni Versace, who Cunanan assassinated in front of the fashion designer’s Miami mansion. Prior to that encounter, Cunanan shot and killed former Naval officer Jeffrey Trail and architect David Madson, both of whom were friends. Some friend, huh?

From there, Cunanan booked it to Chicago, where he killed real estate mogul Lee Miglin, whose car he stole. Realizing that coppers would be on his tale, Cunanan ditched Miglin’s wheels and took Pennsylvania caretaker William Reese’s truck. As you can imagine, the price was Reese’s life.

All this psycho bitchery landed Cunanan on the FBI’s most wanted list, but authorities never got a chance to take him in: Cunanan shot just before being captured.

Fritz Haarmann: Cunanan’s not the only queer serial killer – and he’s certainly got nothing on German-national Fritz Haarmann. Most of you probably don’t recognize this man’s name, but perhaps you recognize his nickname, the Butcher of Hanover, a moniker he earned for the 24 murders he committed between 1919 and 1924. And these were no “normal” murders. Haarmann picked up gay prostitutes or other down-and-out men, took them back to his place and screwed them twice: first in the butt and then in the neck, which he bit through and led them bleed to death. Such a task takes a great amount of work, so Haarmann allegedly got some help from his live in lover, who served twelve years in prison. Haarmann, meanwhile, was executed.

Emporer Nero: Sure, “gay” didn’t exist in the Roman Empire, but gay acts sure as shit did, and Nero had a number of flaming flings, including one with man he had previously castrated. So, what’s so evil about this guy? Well, aside from the conquering and pillaging, Nero wanted to rule Rome so badly that he killed his adoptive brother. Then, when his mother objected to his tyrannical ways, he killed her, too. A grown man murdering his mama? Icy!