rogue candidate

‘Trans Satanist anarchist’ wins GOP nomination in local sheriff’s race because it’s the year 2020

Here’s something that could only happen in the year 2020.

A political candidate who identifies as a “transsexual Satanist anarchist” and whose campaign slogan is “F*ck the Police” has just won the GOP nomination in the Cheshire County, New Hampshire sheriff’s race.

Aria DiMezzo says it’s “totally oblivious” Republican voters “wouldn’t have voted” for her if they had actually researched her. But they didn’t. So now they’re stuck with her as their candidate this November. Whomp, whomp.

“You feel betrayed. You may even be wondering how the party that you so believed in could do something like this,” DiMezzo wrote in a blog post after winning her primary last week. “But, odds are, you’re blaming me.”

DiMezzo, who is both a Libertarian and the High Priestess of the Reformed Satanic Church, says she’s running for sheriff to fight against the “reckless” partisan electoral system that allowed her to become the GOP nominee in the first place.

“More than 4,000 people went into the voting booth on September 8 this week, and they all filled in the circle by my name despite knowing absolutely nothing about the person they were nominating to the most powerful law enforcement position in the county,” she wrote.

“The system that let you down by allowing me–the freaking transsexual Satanist anarchist–be your sheriff candidate is the same system I’m attacking. I’m sorry, and I know it hurts to hear, but that system is a lie.”

DiMezzo says it’s the same tactic Donald Trump, who she labels a Democrat, used to win the presidency in 2016. And it worked for her, too… albeit on a much smaller scale.

“It’s all broken,” DiMezzo wrote, adding that only one person in the whole county did any research on her. “He spread what he found everywhere. Good on him. That is a person I respect.”

DiMezzo, whose car was vandalized with antigay graffiti after her primary win, will face off against incumbent Sheriff Eli Rivera in November.

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