Jonathan Hernandez, older brother of late New England Patriot’s footballer Aaron Hernandez, has made some big revelations in his new family memoir, The Truth About Aaron. Jonathan confirmed the rumors that have long swirled around Aaron: he was gay.
Aaron Hernandez rose to fame as a tight end with the Patriots but was charged with the murder of semi-pro football player Odin Lloyd in 2013. A court convicted Hernandez and sentenced him to life in prison without parole. Following acquittal on another murder charge in 2017, Hernandez committed suicide.
Related: Aaron Hernandez’s lawyer claims he “clearly was gay” in shocking TV special
Now Jonathan Hernandez has opened up about their family secrets, and his brother’s tortured upbringing. He says their father abused both boys, beating them for the smallest of infractions. Jonathan also says an older boy sexually abused Aaron at age six. The abuse went unreported.
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“We were brought up in the sense that seeking help was weak and, you know, crying was weak,” Jonathan said to CBS. He also adds that Aaron’s relationship with their father changed after he began to excel in sports. Knowing their father disapproved of homosexuality also cast a pall of guilt and shame over Aaron. “You could kind of see what, you know, his conflicts were and what he was struggling with, and it’s, you know, his sexuality … and accepting himself.”
Aaron’s shame, coupled with brain injuries sustained on the football field, led to dramatic changes in behavior, according to Jonathan. He also says he’s come forward with their family story in hopes that it will save others from a similar, tragic fate. “I just hope that people can understand and appreciate the value of seeking help and understanding that you’re not weak,” he said. “It’s actually courageous.”
Kieran
Now that it is has been confirmed that NFL football star Aaron Hernandez was gay, I’d like to thank queerty for not publishing any memes of Hernandez wearing lipstick, eye shadow and earrings.
Kangol
It’s sad that you have gender sensitivity issues, but you do know that some gay men wear makeup and accessories like earrings, and some do not, right? Had Aaron Hernandez been able to be out and proudly gay, he might have been able to make such fashion choices for himself, as many gay, bi and trans men, like many straight men, do. His life is a series of tragedies that culminated in his suffering severe brain damage, committing murder, being convicted and sent to prison, and suicide. Whatever fashion choices he made or didn’t are the least important aspect of his short, sad existence.
prarie pup
SHHH! Don’t give them any ideas.
jcoberkrom
Think of all the other closeted NFL players. Is the money really worth it?
SFHandyman
His contract was $40,000,000.00. That is a lot of zeros for staying closeted for a few years. I still think they should come out though.
Donston
I doubt he was bound to come out after the NFL and was perhaps never destined to have an open same-sex relationship. His issues were clearly numerous and beyond the NFL and likely would have continued after his football career. The brain damage, the megalomaniac instincts, his drug habit, the shame, the self-hatred, his traumatic childhood. You can only truly place the first one on the NFL.
Scout
It must have been torture to be in the same locker room and showers with the likes of the Gronk, Brady, and Garopolo and have to stay restrained.
Donston
Garopolo, sure. I’m cool on Brady and Gronk. Gronk is mostly just a buff body with a meh face and no booty. Besides, Aaron seemed to like smaller, slightly more effeminate, semi pretty boys.
JamJewel
Bros will be bros! I would bet there is football player somewhere who could confirm the story what with all the drinking and carousing for which they are famous. Or is that just a fantasy?
gus.lightner
That his brother had the courage to speak out may save someone else who suffered childhood sexual or physical abuse from suicide.
We never really know how much anyone else suffers but a gesture of kindness may make a whole lot of difference.
Virpilosus
Your comment shows both wisdom and compassion… thank you.
Kangol
Excellent points. Thank you for posting them.
Doctor Benway
Am i the only one who feels unconfortable speculating over a dead man sexuality?
Whatever this guy did, he killed himself, that’s terrible enough.
I don’t see what is relevant about him being gay or anything. I feel like i’m reading The Sun, i feel nauseous.
AlexEf
Did you even read the article?
Donston
Well, this is a gossip site. Also, this is info from his brother and rather dark and insightful info. It’s not frivolous stuff coming from mere “sources”. And pretty much every site and newspaper is writing about this. It’s not a “gay media” thing.
bonbon
It doesn’t seem like they’re speculating at all, rather just reporting.
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
So he REALLY could have been a tight end then???
bbbbmer
god he was gorgeous…..
jasentylar
He was also a psycho.
mz.sam
Along with sadly being machismo-centric, self-loathing and inherently violent nature.
Donston
His brother gave some pretty fascinating insights. There’s a few things that stand out to me.
Apparently, Aaron needed to get drunk or high to get it on with women, which hints that he was indeed pretty far into the homo spectrum, at least from a sexual standpoint. Aaron also blamed his orientation on being sexually abused, and it made him resent being gay. It’s a shame that many homosexual, romantically homo-leaning, trans-leaning and/or gay people end up resenting their orientation, resenting themselves, resenting gay people and going down a path of self-destruction because of past abuse. The homophobic and hyper macho environment he grew up in and the megalomaniac instincts and brain injuries he endured probably didn’t help either.
nitejonboy
I know it will never happen, but I wish American football would be outlawed, the concussions and brain injuries have destroyed so many lives. I pray Aaron is at peace now.
QueerTruth
It’s a matter of time… fewer parents allow their sons to join because of the head trauma. It’s really just a matter of time.
DHT
I think pedophiles should be held responsible, and subject to the same punishments, for whatever crimes their victims commit.
DrDavid
I’m sorry but is no one evin thinking of the fact he took the lives of several ppl . Gay or not wtf ppl wake up he was never any kind of hero he had everything and acted like athug don’t for get that . Ur all worried if he was a top or bottom I’m thinking wtf is wrong with all of u . He destroyed lives !
JamJewel
It makes me wonder if the head injuries caused the thuggish behavior or if it was a reaction to his father’s physical abuse or if it was just one of his personality traits. The irrational killing of his best friend and the other two young men [I think that was the one where he was acquitted] over supposed minor slights certainly makes one wonder.
Donston
A hero? No. He was clearly a violent, screwy in the head loon. But that doesn’t mean we should talk about him in a one-dimensional fashion or shouldn’t acknowledge who he was and what he went through beyond him offing people.
The lusting after him thing is doing too much, but it shouldn’t be unexpected. Before most people accepted that the guy was likely gay there were plenty of women on social media lusting after him, proclaiming his innocence, or showing general sympathy towards him. Now that many are aware that he likely had same-sex leaning romantic and sexual fulfillment most of those women have gone silent. But this isn’t something that only gay men have been doing. If you’re at least halfway decent looking there are people who will show you support or sympathy or will unabashedly lust after you or at least will be willing to give you the benefit of the doubt.
JamJewel
I think we know from the Catholic sex abuse scandal that sexual abuse does not make someone gay and is traumatic in and of itself, regardless of orientation.
Donston
It seems as if sexual/emotional/physical abuse, sexual assault and rape have different affects on different people. It doesn’t appear to “make” someone technically and 100% homo. But it does seem as if it can have an affect on someone being “queer” and having some convolution or contradiction in their orientation, instincts and/or their sense of gender. I hate to say it, but whether they identify as gay, straight, bi, fluid, queer, etc. almost every person I’ve had in-depth conversation with who doesn’t feel 100% cis gender and isn’t 100% homo from a sexual, romantic and relationship standpoint has experienced some type of sexual trauma. However, there are people who endure those thing and end up being hetero or at least “mostly straight” and do feel 100% cis gender. And there are plenty of people who are truly born homosexual. Individuals who are homosexual/romantically homo-leaning/gay but have endured some type of sexual abuse do tend to be more likely to contend with self-resentment, internalized homophobia, shame, “confusion” and/or self-destructive instincts.
Ultimately, it seems as if everyone is just different and are different for many different reasons, which a lot of people are uncomfortable with.
Billy Budd
He was kinda cute. Too bad he was nuts and a killer.
JH0607
I would have done him for the danger, which always gets me off.