First Person

Confessions Of A “Closet Case”

2380542I love a stupid Reddit/ BuzzFeed quiz more than anyone. Sure, I don’t need to answer 10 questions to know that I’m more “Mystique” than “Wolverine” and I’ll always be a “Thomas Barrow” from Downton Abbey, but a quiz on a friend’s Facebook feed popped up today that slowed my roll over my morning coffee.

“Which Gay Stereotype Are You?”

My friend had been deemed a Bromo presumably because he goes to the gym, drinks beer, buys lots of “bro tanks” or snapbacks (note to self: Google “what the hell is a snapback”), uses the word “bro” a lot, wants to be a hashtag-baller, and his hobby is working out.  

I decided to take the quiz for myself, because I’m over forty and I clearly need to know what stereotype I represent to my community.

To make things easy, I’ll just say:

When someone asks me if I’m gay, I say, “I’m a dude who likes dudes.”

What I like about men is “some of the coolest people I know are dudes.”

The phase I just most often is “hi.”

I dress simply: jeans and t-shirts.

I listen to whatever is on the radio.

Shopping is not my thing.

I’m not really into shopping.  (Apparently shopping is very important in identifying my stereotype.)

My dream job is “world-famous performer” (though, I strive to be working actor and independent filmmaker, but that was the closest option).

My hobby is writing.

And apparently I am a “Closet Case.”  

1175221_10203538469196818_7786501041311735299_nFrom the description: “We can’t tell you what gay stereotype you are, because you don’t even know what your sexuality is! There’s nothing wrong with that—figuring out your identity can take years—but you’re the only one who can do it. Taking a quiz like this is a great first step, but don’t take it too seriously. Keep checking out LGBT resources (*cough*LGBTeen*cough*) and maybe visit your school’s GSA, if they have one. The more you learn about the spectrum of identities out there (believe us, there’s plenty!), the easier it will be to find one that fits.”

I’m going to be 42 in November and believe me, I expected my answer to be “Bitter Old Queen,” or “Gay-Dead” but CLOSET CASE? Apparently I wasn’t alone.  Most of the other commenters were Closet Cases as well.

And yes, I know stupid surveys like this are meant to pass time on the internet when we should be doing something far more practical and productive things and yes, crystal clear from the description that this is aimed at teens.  But that makes this all the more horrifying!  

LBGTeen is basically telling kids if you’re “normal” (again, not a word anyone would use to describe me) and dress in jeans, listen to the radio and you don’t like shopping, there is something wrong with you. They tell you there are a “spectrum of identities out there.” So let’s look at a few.

Our lesbian sisters?  Your stereotype is “Big Lez.”  You only have one option, seeing as how you can only answer “I’m a lesbian” for most of the questions.  “OMG you’re a big lez. You are a girl who likes girls. There are a number of potential stereotypes you might fall into, but that is a whole other quiz.”

RuPaul-All-Stars-1024x1024Hear that girls? There are a number of potential stereotypes you “might” fall into. So, fingers crossed.

Like singing, using the word “fierce,” dressing fun and being sassy?  You’re a “Drag Queen.”  To quote:  “Maybe you’ve never worn make-up or performed before, but your outgoing personality, passion for queer culture, and love of all things fabulous make you just as fierce as any Drag Race contestant. Doing drag may be something you’ll want to try someday. But even if you never beat your face and vogue on stage, you’re going to be expressing yourself no matter what. And that’s the fiercest thing of all.”

If you were someone politically active and identified as trans or party of the IQA then you were a “Social Justice Warrior.  “You believe in equality for all and you have a clear vision of what that looks like — and what it will take to make that vision a reality. You’re probably heavily involved in your school’s GSA and active on social justice blogs. The work you do is amazing and you should keep it up, but also stop to consider if you’re getting too caught up in tearing down the system. It might seem like you don’t have time—and, okay, maybe we don’t—but it’s nice to chill out sometimes and just enjoy the world for what it is, even if it’s not perfect.”

queer-eye-for-the-straight-guy-22-gYou need to like fashion, love shopping, singing and dancing, think men “are hot,” use the work “werk,” dress in JT-inspired awesomeness, love Lana Del Rey’s “This is What Makes Us Girls,” say “YAAAASSSSS!” to be considered “Fab Gay.” A Fab Gay is “into theatre, fashion or pop music, you are the epitome of some of the most fun aspects of gay culture. You’re fun, fabulous and fierce—total GBF material. Though it can suck when people assume you’re gay just because of what you like, or try to reduce you down to a stereotype for their own amusement, you don’t mind. You’re too busy doing what you love and being yourself. Keep it up!”

I just threw up a little in my kale.

The “Bromo” result was even worse!  “You’re just a regular guy who likes other regular guys. You don’t really ‘get’ queer culture and tend to stay away from things like pride parades. And that’s fine. Queer culture and activism aren’t for everyone. But you should ask yourself if your aversion to the LGBT community is due to any shame or embarrassment you feel about your sexuality. It might not be, but you should still consider getting involved. You don’t have to become a stereotype—although the “bromosexual” is becoming an increasingly common breed of gay—but you should still support your community. Who knows? Maybe your presence in the community will challenge someone else’s misconceptions about gay people?”


I can’t speak for most of America, but all the “Bromos” I know in Atlanta are some of the most socially and politically active individuals in the city!  Two weeks ago, the entire community (hundreds of Bromos, Closet Cases, Fab Gays and Big Lezs) turned out for Joining Hearts Pool Party, which raised thousands of dollars for HIV/ AIDS Service Organizations in the city.

I didn’t go, because a) I don’t go to any party where it is announced a DJ will be spinning and b) I don’t do anything involving the words “pool party.”  That’s not because I’m a Closet Case.  It’s because I’m rapidly turning into an old person and I’m just a year or two away from having a shotgun on porch screaming, “get off my lawn!”

Chad Darnell
Chad Darnell

However, I’ve run six marathons to raise money for AIDS Project Los Angeles, I’ve walked in about two dozen AIDS walks, I’m an award-winning LGBT filmmaker (plug: Birthday Cake is available for purchase now!) making movies about gay families, gay adoption, and gay icons (soon to be in production on the Joey Stefano biopic, X-Rated).  I’ve volunteered with Project Angel Food, Trevor Project, AID Atlanta, The NAMES Project… but apparently, I’m a Closet Case.

Our times are rapidly changing and we are obviously more than these half dozen stereotypes.  We are husbands and wives.  We are parents.  We are just trying to find good date material.  We’re doctors, lawyers, teachers, actors, janitors, baristas, bartenders, gogo boys, activists.

But I fear we are doing something terribly wrong, when sites like this promote that you can only be one of six groups.  We are missing a teaching moment for teens and whoever created this quiz at LGBTeen who think, this is the gay experience.  That we should all aspire to be a Fab Gay.  Aspire to the be the Gay Best Friend.

Just a little over twenty years ago when I began my career as an actor, the only roles available were drag queen, swishy waiter, or AIDS patient.  But the world sees us as more than those three stereotypes now.

What I love about our community is the diversity in our villages.  We are starting to see a brighter, hopeful future with the fall of DADT and the momentum of marriage equality.  Our media will continue to slap photos of Tom Daley in a speedo and “porn stars with cats” on the cover of a magazine or web sites to generate ad revenue, but our stories are starting to flesh out.  And as we tell our stories, the people who just a few years ago didn’t understand or accept us, realize we’re not these monsters they were led to believe.

Update:  A “snapback” is a hat.  Now get off my lawn, gurl!

Chad Darnell is an actor, writer and director who lives in Atlanta, Georgia.

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  • Miss Understood

    Anyone can post anything on the Internet. If this quiz was published by a actual magazine with an an actual hired editor I would understand your complaints. But now what would have been scribblings in a naive teens notebook can be posted online for the world to see. Of course it makes no sense. Back in the day I knew a girl who was convinced that she was going to marry one of the guys from Duran Duran. Teenagers think and write dumb stuff, it’s not going to change. Hopefully he’ll grow out of his narrow beliefs, but in the meantime I wouldn’t take is so seriously.

  • level75RDM

    It’s a BuzzFeed quiz and more the pity if there are actually people out there who give their results more than a passing thought. Except for that one that says my DreamWorks character is Hiccup. And that I’m a Grass/Psychic Pokemon. Those I agree with entirely.

    I will, however say, that the original poster’s volunteerism and social justice work is enviable. I need to try harder.

  • pressuredrop

    This has to be a generational thing, because anybody under 30 would have dismissed a quiz like that as drivel within a tiny fraction of the time it takes to read this article.

  • masc4masc

    I think Chad actually made some pretty spot-on observations. The results discussed go beyond online quizzes; the gay community promotes them too. If you’re not into certain things or don’t carry yourself in a certain way, people (even IRL) assume you haven’t figured yourself out or you must be struggling with your sexuality. Very condescending and homophobic. It’s part of why we have the “self-loathing”/”closet case” masc-shaming constantly spewed at bi and gay men that simply enjoy their masculinity. On the other hand, if you’re one of the hypereffeminate/catty/fashion forward “fab gays”, you’re automatically deemed “gay and proud”. It’s unfortunate that the “fab gays” have sort of claimed a monopoly on the gay community that prevents more “bromos” from getting involved.

  • Ridpathos

    Just took that quiz. It was incredibly vacuous. I moved on with my life. Though I agree as a teacher that a teenager taking this quiz who happens to be normal and gay would be somewhat pressured to start acting like a queen to really fill in his ‘gayness shoes’.

  • tdh1980

    @masc4masc: Um, in which world are you living? Where is this magical, mystical place wherein this phenomenon called “masc-shaming” occurs? Because in both virtual and actual reality I regularly encounter a movement of “masc for masc/real men only/men who are men/I hate anything even remotely associated with being feminine or a woman” that does anything but put that type of “catty” gays of whom you speak on a pedestal.

  • level75RDM

    @tdh1980: The masculine-shaming gays are vastly outnumbered by the feminine-shaming, even if you go out of your way to search for examples of it.

    But in masc4masc’s defense, this lolBuzzfeed quiz is, in fact, one example of it. The text accompanying its results are awfully presumptuous. Given its target demographic of teens, it’s probably written by the same sort of idiotic hack that wrote that a GBF is a girl’s must-have item.

  • masc4masc

    @tdh1980: Masc privilege exists in clubs/bars and hookup sites because that’s what most guys find desirable, but when it comes to community/activism and what’s commonly shown in media, fems take center stage. As the author has explained, he’s done a lot of work in the LGB community and was still deemed a “closet case” because of his interests. A hypereffeminate guy who hasn’t done anything in the LGB community but crossdress and wave rainbow flags mostly likely won’t be put in the “closet case” box. You’re all saying it’s just a silly internet quiz, but gay people do this type of generalizing and assuming IRL too. It discourages certain types from getting involved and being more visible.

  • Saint Law

    Try2hard4try2hard said: “It’s unfortunate that the “fab gays” have sort of claimed a monopoly on the gay community that prevents more “gutless closet-cases” from getting involved.”

    There, fixed that for you, deary.

  • level75RDM

    @masc4masc: If they would allow others to influence who they are and how they present themselves, then they deserve to remain invisible. I’m not going to allow strangers on the internet determine who I should or should not be.

    It’s even worse if this is used as some excuse to not be involved in activism or socially conscious endeavors. Those people are too involved for themselves to worry about making better for other people.

  • tdh1980

    @masc4masc: When I see the faces of gay activism as portrayed in mainstream media, the only thing they are overwhelmingly is white and male, not “feminine.” In fact, I don’t see any one particular gender expression represented with respect to that, at least not in the stereotypical ways that we are describing here.

  • tdh1980

    @tdh1980: I meant to say “overwhelmingly represented.”

  • masc4masc

    @Saint Law: Thanks for providing an example of the exact type of baseless assumptions and unprovoked aggression my comment was describing.

    @level75RDM: What I took from this story is that there are many ways to be gay outside of the stereotypes the community promotes. We shouldn’t put all the focus on one type because guys that don’t fit it either won’t be interested or will justifiably dissociate. Nobody wants to be around a bunch of bitchiness (see Saint Law’s unnecessary reply), but that shouldn’t mean they “deserve to be invisible”.

    @tdh1980: Fems have always been much more represented:

    “I began my career as an actor, the only roles available were drag queen, swishy waiter, or AIDS patient.”

    Also, RuPaul’s Drag Race is probably the biggest gay-themed show in history.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: as usual, your 100% false straw man arguments.

    the only thing stopping you, and guys like you, from getting involved and being seen is your own insecurity. and shame. and embarrassment. nobody is silencing your but yourselves. there is no “masc-shaming”. anywhere. you pretend there is, because it’s easier to pretend that than be real and say “i’m really just insecure about being gay, and it’s largely in party to my shitty family”

    am i wrong? prove it – show yourself. you won’t. because i’m not wrong.

    here’s something: gay guys who say “i’m into guys/dudes” are self-hating. they’re still terrified of being gay. of being known as gay. of being seen as gay.

    masculine gay men don’t have a problem with perceived “effeminate” gay men. only insecure wimpy boys whose “macho act” is faux posturing feel that way.,

    yeah. “masc4masc” – yeah right. and in true fashion, your “masc-ness” is self-styled, and anonymous. a lie you tell yourselves, borne of your unchecked daddy issues.

    and don’t bother replying to me – until you make your comments from a place of visibility, you’ll only ever be proving me right.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: just to drive home my point a little more, to remind you of how pathetic a wimp you are – masculine gay men are in no way ever denigrated in society – including within the gay community. nobody is ever looked down on for “enjoying their masculinity”

    it’s cowards like you – broken boys who will only ever be disappointments to their fathers, that harbour resentment toward perceived-“effeminacy”, and like to pretend that “you’re discriminated against just for being masculine”

    it’s false. other gay people dislike you because you’re an insecure wimp with no testicles. your father disliked you because he’s a misogynistic anti-gay asshole, and your constant anonymous claims will never be taken seriously. you know you’re full of shit – that’s why you can’t comment from a place of visibility.

    stop blaming fem guys for the fact that your father resents having to call you Son.

  • DerekR

    @Little-Kiwi: LOL the day guys like him (Dixly, Litper, Jim Bryant) step out from behind the veil of anonymity is the day the internet ceases to exist…

  • Little-Kiwi

    @DerekR: Truth – Internet Anonymity is the last refuge of cowards.
    And he’s a coward. In every way.

    “oh, we can’t take part because you effeminate flamboyant gays are ruining it and hate us for being masculine!”

    No. You just never grew the balls to stand up to your shitty fathers who wish you weren’t their sons.

  • tdh1980

    @Little-Kiwi: Exactly. I question the self-esteem of any man who sees another man’s gender expression as a challenge to his own. It’s internalized homophobia plain and simple. The “feminine” guys remind them of everything they hate about being gay.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @tdh1980: truly ‘masculine’ guys don’t limitations on the masculinity of others, nor do they denigrate those who may be perceived to be “not as masculine”, whatever that means.

    every time a gay man touts his own “masculinity” and denigrates another’s “effeminacy’ what he’s really saying is “My dad hates fems. and so i hate fems, too. because my dad isn’t proud of me”

  • Cam

    This seems like a conversation that would have happened a few decades ago. This quiz is basically saying if you aren’t Richard Simmons then you’re a closet case??

  • Dxley

    @masc4masc: LOL

  • DistingueTraces

    it’s not some random person being dumb

    “LGBTeen” is an online magazine targeted at gay youth

    so, yes, if they’re promoting dumb stereotypes to their readers it’s a problem

  • level75RDM

    @masc4masc: No, they do deserve to be invisible because they choose to be invisible. Nobody put a gun to their head through their magic computer screen and said they must be a flaming queen or disappear into obscurity. They’re blaming the way other people are for their own choice not to be visible.

    If only other gays would stop being such girly queers, I wouldn’t have be embarrassed to be gay? I’m sorry, but anybody that believes that is simpleminded. And wrong. And simpleminded.

  • jmmartin

    @masc4masc: Very nicely put, Chad Darnell. Yes, valid points. Those tests cannot objectively rate human sexuality because human sexuality is so fluid and fickle it’s like looking for a fart in a whirlwind.

  • DarkZephyr

    @masc4masc: What I am taking away from most of your comments is that you and I owe many of the freedoms that we enjoy today as gay men and many of the ones we will soon enjoy to feminine gay men who are brave enough to get out there and be visible while they fight for the rights of LGBT people of every stripe? Well, kudos to them then! I am eternally grateful!

    And for the record, Little-Kiwi is very visible and has linked to his amazing blog LOADED with youtube vlog videos of himself on several occasions. He is probably one of if not THE the most visible of all of us who comment here at Queerty. He is very cute too.

  • masc4masc

    @tdh1980: I question the self-esteem of any fem that gets as emotional as Kiwi when he saw “masc4masc”. Guys that are truly secure in their effeminacy don’t get that angry and offended by such phrases. The 3 lines of his little tantrum that I actually read were way too intense coming from someone I’ve never had any interaction with before.

    @level75RDM: That’s how you feel. I think it makes sense that people who aren’t as included tend to feel somewhat disconnected or just plain uninterested. The LGB community was pretty invisible to mainstream society for a long time; do you think that was their choosing too? I do believe in being proactive though. I’m as involved in the LGB community as I care to be at this time. It’d be nice if there were more “bromos” and regular Joes. The author even said that a bigger bromo presence could help change people’s misconceptions about gay men, and it’s true (like or not). I wasn’t “blaming” anyone. No need to get so defensive.

  • masc4masc

    @DarkZephyr: Aside from my kid, I don’t owe anybody anything. If you feel indebted to fems, please speak for yourself. You can kiss Kiwi’s butt if you want to, but I’m not interested in any of that nutcase’s pictures or videos.

  • Elloreigh

    So, I jumped right to the quiz without reading the accompanying article. When I get my result, Closet Case, my reaction is the same as it was when reading most of the questions/answers: ??? Lame.

    Then I come back to read the article. I can relate, Chad. No one should have to turn themselves into a stereotype just to feel they have an ‘identity’, or a place in the gay community.

    I’m not ‘fabulous’. I’m not ‘butch’ (do people even say ‘butch’ anymore? Showing my age, I suppose.) I’m just a fat old man who is rather bored with it all. I gave up trying to fit in anyplace a long time ago. But I’m no “closet case”. I’m out, I did my small part back in the day, and I’m now resting in the living room with my feet propped up. If there’s a stereotype for that, I don’t want to hear about it.

  • DarkZephyr

    @masc4masc: Ah so you take your freedoms for granted then?

    And you are the one that claimed that none of the people challenging you were visible. I pointed out to you that this is not the case. He isn’t a nutcase either. He is a very sound, reasonable, well spoken young man.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: stop blaming “fems” for the fact that your father is ashamed of you.

  • masc4masc

    @DarkZephyr: To which fem do I “owe” my freedom to date/have sex with other guys? I really wasn’t aware that fems established this freedom for all of us. Thought I established that freedom for myself. Silly me.

    That little fruit didn’t make himself visible here, so he’s anonymous to me (just like you). Anyone who read just a little of his ranting (to a total stranger) can see he’s very immature and far from reasonable. But so are you, so I can see why you’ve chosen come rushing to his defense (as you usually tend to do for anyone who’s in disagreement with me). You obviously feel he needs help. ;-)

  • masc4masc

    @Little-Fruit: Sorry to disappoint you, but my dad has been nothing supportive of me my whole life. We’re actually very close. Stop blaming me for your feelings of inadequacy.

  • Little-Kiwi

    I call your bluff :)

    how am i anonyous? click my name, see who i am. :)

    “masc4masc”, said the boy with daddy issues :D

  • Dxley

    Kiwi, gee! You’re really convinced that every gay man who prefers masculine men has daddy issues, aren’t you? Just because your Daddy rejected you doesn’t mean ours’ did as well.

  • masc4masc

    You used to go by BeeGaga, correct? Those silly 14 y/o girl retorts totally give you away. Post it here, or it doesn’t exist. Not interested in whatever viruses your shitty little link leads off to.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @Dxley: nope. not at all.

    as i’ve said a billion times, to guys who aren’t stupid and thus can’t understand it, it has nothing to do with “masculinity”

    i’ve never once said “every gay man who prefers masculine men has daddy issues” – it’s that those who denigrate perceived-effeminacy *do*.

    my daddy rejected me? click on my name, see my blog, see my parents. yeah, i blog with them. and about them.

    we march together in the pride parade, every year. do your parents? no. they don’t.

    it’s rather simple: only insecure anonymous wusses with daddy issues talk the way you and “masc for masc” do.

  • masc4masc

    @Dxley: He obviously thinks that’s a great comeback. From what I remember of his other account, he’s like 16 or something. All makes perfect sense now. lol

  • Dxley

    @masc4masc: Think he might have missed that link you sent to him?

  • Little-Kiwi

    Did your dad march with you in the pride parade? Mine did. :-)

  • Dxley

    I don’t march in the pride parades, Kiwi. I don’t want to.

  • masc4masc

    @Dxley: Lol isn’t it funny how the ones that need the most help are always so adamantly against it? And what’s it’s obsession with people’s fathers? Someone’s got daddy issues alright….

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: irony – you can get help learning to get over your insecure internalized homophobia. Or you can continue being the kind of wimp that trolls anonymously on the Internet because he hasn’t the balls to be visible. And of course that other loser doesn’t participate in pride. And his dad never would. As yours wouldn’t. And it’s obvious why. #gethelp

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: there is no “masc shaming”. Your dad was ashamed of you, and you blame other gays for it, and pretend they shame you. They dot. Your dad did. And it’s obvious. Am I wrong? Prove it. You won’t. You can’t.

  • DarkZephyr

    @masc4masc: You are the one that was complaining earlier that Feminine gay guys take the largest role in the gay rights movement. I am just going by what you said! :)

    WOW, I just read what you said where you basically suggest Kiwi kills himself. You know, I had started to think that there might be at least a LITTLE decency in you but now I see that you are just a terrible, rotten human being.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: you keep proving me right. :-) and always will. It’s obvious – you never grew a pair

  • DarkZephyr

    @Little-Kiwi: You know who has SEVERE daddy issues? He has come right out and admitted it. Masc4Masc’s dear friend Dxley. “In a couple years” he plans on finding a heterosexual woman and making her fall in love with him and marrying her and having kids with her SO THAT he can make his Daddy happy. He has admitted this.

  • DarkZephyr

    “Our media will continue to slap photos of Tom Daley in a speedo and “porn stars with cats” on the cover of a magazine or web sites to generate ad revenue, but our stories are starting to flesh out.”

    Just noticed this. lol Weren’t both of these here at Queerty? Yes they were. lol Actually Queerty does the Tom Daley thing at least once a week (I’m not complaining) and the porn star and cats thing is right here:

  • Dxley

    @ DarkZephyr: What’s wrong with making my Daddy happy? I think I’ve said before that he knows I’m gay and has been nothing but supportive although I’ve never really appreciated it until now. My father loves both his children, and besides making him happy, it could be what I want for myself. Although he doesn’t really encourage race-mixing in the family, he’s never said anything about homosexuality and knows he can’t do anything to stop me from being with a man/woman of any race. He’s the best man I’ve known my entire life and I’m back home this weekend catching up and having a great time with my mom and him. What the hell does “daddy issues” even mean? The fact that your Daddy has issues that he raised a flamboyant, feminine, hypersensitive, limp-wristed queen like yourself? Yeah! Sounds about right.

  • DarkZephyr

    @Dxley: LOL you don’t know anything about me, but I know a lot about you because you air your laundry ALL the time. I don’t know if you will ever find a woman OR a man. You are just too gross and self loathing. Gay men don’t want a guy like you. Neither do straight women.

  • Dxley

    @DarkZephyr: Maybe you’re right. I don’t know anything about you, but I’m pretty sure your father rejected you. Shh! It’s okay, it’s okay.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @Dxley: oh, i get it. you’re just a satirical troll. race mixing, eh? yay! at least i know not to take you seriously anymore. thanks.

  • masc4masc

    @DarkZephyr: I was stating an observation, not complaining. You weren’t going by what I said; you just realized you made a silly statement you couldn’t prove. I said fems get the most recognition. The term “center stage” is a reference to attention, not actual work. In fact, I believe the most difference has been made by the bi/gay average Joes who’ve shown that they’re no different from other guys, and the author even alluded to the same idea. Maybe it’s you guys that actually owe us your freedom to be openly fem. You’ve supported the unprovoked vitriol from that bitter little fruit, so you’re in no position to try and judge anyone’s character now.

  • Little-Kiwi

    @masc4masc: behind every gay man that denigrates perceived “effeminacy” is the father who resented having a gay son. You’re a textbook example. It’s clear in all your comments. You were raised by a shitty misogynistic anti-gay father, and never grew the balls to stand up to him. It’s ok, baby. It happens to many gay men, but try growing a pair and stop being such a stereotypical internet coward, who lashes out anonymously online because he can’t get over being an embarrassment to his family. You can’t show yourself, and you never will be able to. You’re the personification of the saddest of gay stereotypes – the insecure homosexual who can only make his boastful claims from a place of anonymity. You have my pity.

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