it got much better

Ellen DeGeneres Thought She’d Never Come Out Publicly

Screen Shot 2015-10-26 at 8.24.52 AMIn 1997, Ellen DeGeneres became an unintentional activist when she announced she was gay.

The decision, Ellen admits in this new clip for Oprah’s Master Class series, was one she never thought she’d make.

“I certainly didn’t ever that I was going to come out,” she says. “Period. And I didn’t think I’d be coming out on a show, ever.”

The talk show host recalls attending a course at the Esalen Institute near Big Sur, California (and popularized in the final episode of Mad Men) called “Changing the Inner Dialogue.” After discovering that her fear was that no one would love her or allow her to be famous once they knew she was gay, DeGeneres realized that the shame she was feeling was making her pretend to be someone she wasn’t.

Watch the entire clip below:

H/t: LGBTQ Nation