Priest Fears Soccer Players Wearing Gay Shoes Are A Threat To Christianity

shumskyCan shoes be gay? According to one Russian Orthodox Priest, they can.

While the rest of the world has been fawning over the sinfully sexy soccer players at the FIFA World Cup in Brazil, Alexander Shumsky (pictured) has been fuming over their flamboyant choice of footwear, The Washington Post reports.

The priest called this summer’s games a “homosexual abomination.” More specifically, he said that soccer players’ brightly colored shoes were promoting the “gay rainbow.”

In a column penned for the Christian website Russian People’s Line, Shumsky claims that by “wearing pink or blue shoes, [the players] might as well wear women’s panties or a bra.”

In addition to the shoes, Shumsky said he’s also offended by the “unthinkable” hairstyles worn by some of the players.

So what does all this mean?

It’s an attack on Christianity, of course!

“The liberal ideology of globalism clearly wants to oppose Christianity with football,” the priest wrote.

He added: “Therefore I am glad that the Russian players have failed and, by the grace of God, no longer participate in this homosexual abomination.”

Russia was eliminated in the first round of the World Cup, after failing to win a single match in the group stages.

Perhaps if players hadn’t have been wearing pink shoes, the Russians would have fared better. We will never know for certain, though Shumsky says he is “sure of it.”

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  • Mezaien

    It`s not the Gay Shoes Are A Threat To Christianity! it`s me. I am the anti Christ and everything and anything to do with Christianity.


    He has a nice dress.

  • Bill

    My reply would be the same as that of John McEnroe. Those of you who are tennis enthusiasts will know what it is!!

  • James Hart

    @Mezaien: You’re the antichrist? Sure, you are, dear. Now, don’t forget to take your little yellow pills two times each day or you might start seeing the little green men again.

  • level75RDM

    …Wait, this isn’t a joke, is it. I wish people like this priest would hurry up and make the connection between homosexuality and breathing oxygen already.

  • jonjct

    @PARKAVMAN: “He has a nice dress”. Lol funny !!!!

  • Desert Boy

    This “priest” looks like he hasn’t had a shower in years. Nasty.

  • Ogre Magi

    His facial hair makes him look like he is swallowing an opossum

  • Lvng1tor

    Someones been consuming a bit too much Blood of Christ!

  • Horse Lips

    He needs a new hobby.

Comments are closed.