Remember Jason and David Benham? Last year, those bigoted bohunks (terrifically twisted twins?) watched their HGTV show Flip It Forward slip right out of their God-fearing fingers, on the heels of very-out-there remarks about “homosexuality and its agenda that is attacking the nation” and “demonic ideologies.”
Well, now they’re back –– not with a show, mind you, because that ship has sailed.
Instead, they’ve written an “op-ed” piece for World Net Daily — an exclusive! — called “Why Believers Can’t Afford To ‘Ride The Fence.’” We put “op-ed” in quotes much like they put “marriage” in quotes, because the whole thing is totally guano insane, even by our standards.
Which are low.
Related: Charming Benham Twins Compare Themselves To ISIS Beheading Victims
Here’s a taste for you; a teaser…
“The Supreme Court’s ruling on gay ‘marriage’ made it painfully obvious that religious liberties, especially for Christians, are now in the cross-hairs of the militant, secular agenda that is fundamentally changing our country. This means we need to get off the fence and stand up.”
And that’s the lucid part. Later:
“You see, there’s no balance on top of a fence, because there’s no foundation for your feet. You simply have to hang on as tight as you can because your feet have nothing to stand on.”
Got that? Oh, and…
“Are you excited to be alive?! God created us and put us here on the earth for such a time as this! So let’s stand to our feet on God’s side of the fence and embrace the fire that purifies our faith.”
So there you have it: stop sitting on fences, give fire a hug, hate gay people, be excited, be be excited.
Did the twins democratically trade off writing duties after each letter? Was the piece written at the last minute, or at last call? We don’t know. But if you’re in need a head-scratching giggle, you can read the whole messed-up screed here.
h/t: Joemygod
Atrius
Of all the Christ-insanity…
Joseph C Landis-Midnight
1032 RIDING TRAIL Ln
1122 RIDING TRAIL LN
Concord NC 28027
It’s creepy that they and their families are neighbors.
Jared MacBride
As Archie Bunker used to say: Meatheads – dead from the neck up.
1EqualityUSA
don’t choke your chic-fil-A boys
Scott Redner
Hmmm me thinks thou protest too much…
Jeff Phillips
Separation of church and state, land of the free, God created all of us…..
Xzamilio
http://shallowvoices.blogspot.com/2015/03/long-rant-bend-it-like-benham-brothers.html
Can’t say anything else about these two.
1EqualityUSA
Xzamilio, fantastic article. thanks.
Keith Galantowicz
These guys are completely and totally and profoundly irrelevant. Fade away forever into obscurity, Benham bois.
bobbyjoe
Once again, thank you HGTV for sparing us these guys. Had it been TLC or A&E, they’d probably have a show running Monday through Friday three times a night.
NoCagada
@1EqualityUSA: Along with the republican adulterer, Dirty Diaper David Vitter
onthemark
Their porn video is going to be very, very weird.
Finrod
I miss the lions.
Atldeuce
Hilarious. It’s like Adam Sandler complaining about bad comedy movies. I guess they, like most of the indignant right have not read the Constitution at any time. The Constitution doesn’t say all religion is protected, even Christianity.
Milk
Oh look? Guess who are out of a day job? Quick! Let’s jump on the anti gay band wagon, hope there are still some scraps left to be had.
SpunkyBunks
So which one is gay?
Billy Budd
Christians are fucked up in the head.
Korree Johnson
And what makes them such experts on homosexuality?
Gerald GeeLocke Panuthos
let me know when somebody leaks the video of them fucking and sucking eachother’s brains out… until then, #ByeFelicias!ð???ð???ð???ð???
Giancarlo85
Where are all the gay republicans who want to defend these idiots? Usually gay republicans find these types of men sexy.
Craig Bankert
Roger Curnock
Why are you still giving these two lunatics coverage?
darian
Can we stop giving every Joe blow who doesn’t like gay people press. These 2 have as much relevancy as Kirk Cameron to the movie industry. Nobody else is checking for them for a reason.
Perry White
Wow these twins are unreal. Was there a problem like no oxygen or something at the hospital when they were born ? They certainly act stupid and slow maybe they were born at home and a mid wife dropped them both !
BlueDude
Not only have they not read the Constitution, but, obviously, they’re ignorant of the Gospels, as well. Aren’t Christians supposed to follow Christ’s teachings? Where do they come up with this hateful crazy nonsense?
Desert Boy
Who cares what these two have to say? I guess JoeMyGod because he can fill his blog up with their comments but nobody else.
brent6696
Please stop giving these twins a voice. They are has-beens, and their opinions are irrelevant.
Xzamilio
@BlueDude: From the bible… have you ever read it??
Joe Robinson
For the sake of fairness the problem here is not the Christian religion but rather the [email protected]’s who claim to represent it.
Kevin J Desmond
So they’re not lovers after all ?
Xzamilio
@Joe Robinson: Porque no los dos?
Michalangelo Towarnicki-Pasiuk Ricoppio-Solski
Ugly
Fuckers
M J Martinez Crogan
Jeff Franklin
These two brothers personify the ILLNESS OF RELIGION. Ego and fear are the motivation here. Be brave boys, you can choose to be free of your delusional religious addiction anytime.
Alex Rothwell
Sounds like a Dinner Theater Musical / Play !
Michael Hunter
Michael Hunter
http://www.addictinginfo.org/2015/07/05/must-watch-brilliant-take-down-of-right-wing-traditional-marriage-argument-video/
LiamCregg
@BlueDude:
American Christianity© and their version of the teachings of Jesus™® is a twisted dangerous mess. These guys preaching is following suit with Dominionists teaching, which is becoming mainstream. I believe that the only period in time where the teachings of the real Jesus were about love and peace was when he was actually alive and doing the things he did. After that it was all down hill. Christianity was twisted into a religion of hate, and has been that for nearly 2000 years. The sects that have tried over the centuries to keep his teachings clean have been relentlessly persecuted and it wasn’t until the 1960’s that modernChrustianity started leaning back towards his real teachings. That period is over.
Dominic Mancuso
Will Glitzern
I guess looks really aren’t everything.
Mark Pointon
David Rudd
Never heard of them !
Paul Higdon-Smith
and NO-ONE CARES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😀 LOL
Carlton Bickle
Those that scream the loudest have the most to hide, lots of brotherly love there I bet! Let me know when they release the video please.
mikelphx
People like these two nut jobs I love the fact they spew their opinion. Makes it easy to weed people out. I’ve heard this religious liberty argument from two supposed friends. They wonder why they never get invited to anything now. If they are against gay marriage don’t give them the time of day.
Josh447
The only fence sitters are these two bottom boys both wondering who in the world should come out first. I suggest they start with their wives and go public on a reality tv show, the cable show they were always meant to have. Late bloomers from the looks of it. Yes bloomers and parasols would be fitting for the premier. Butt please, only for a minute, max. They’re butch they’re hot, they need to stay that way.
Patrick Laney
Actually I do not remember these asshats…
Josh447
LiamCregg,
There is a profound new book called Arclight Book One The Decade Of Correction. It nails exactly what you are talking about, in spades. The book blew me away. The author intends to reground authentic Christianity over the next ten years, turning fake Christianity on its sick fraudulent twisted head. You are right. Jesus got framed after his “death” by his murderers and they created the new testament based on a litany of lies. Paul is one of authentic Christianity’s most lethal weapons. Change is coming. Big change. The gigs up. Check it out.
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
C’mmon Queerty what the flock is with the censorship?????
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
“Ride The Fence” First time I ever heard botoming referred to as that……………
Why do I sense a twin video is on the way ala the Peters Brothers? (;-p)
(Will this one pass the dreaded censor????)
AtticusBennett
that was utterly incoherent. there’s something creepily “flowers in the attic” about these two, if you know what i mean…
BlueDude
@Xzamilio: I said “Gospels”, the four Books of Jesus’ life and teachings. Hmmm, I can’t recall any [email protected] there.
@LiamCregg:@Josh447: Thank both of you for the info! I’m hoping that recent events will continue to unfold, and acceptance increases as the old bigots die off, and millennials mature. I’m an Episcopalian who never hears any hate, or Hell, from the pulpit, only love and grace. LGBTQ folks are welcomed.
Xzamilio
@BlueDude: Well, then, congratulations. Your cherry picked version of the bible is better than their cherry picked version of the bible. I can’t recall a lot of things in the Gospels… like Jesus’s childhood, evidence for his existence, any blessings on gay marriage or homosexuality in general. It’s easy to make a case based on what’s not there as opposed to what is.
I’m glad you have adopted a kinder, gentler Christianity, but I look at the religion based on its merits and evidence, and it has none.
charlieeod74
Yep, bat shit crazy christians, evangelical version. It’s a sickness spreading across the USA
Stefano
@Xzamilio: i think exactly like you.
JB
If they weren’t such wackadoo crazies, they’d actually be kinda hot. I’d love to have them kneel before me and REALLY give them something heavenly to worship. I’ll provide them with a TRULY religious experience.
BlueDude
@Xzamilio: Tomayto, Tomahto. We will never agree on anything, because you’re one of those who believes his notions are the only valid ones.
Xzamilio
@BlueDude: No, I’m one of those who believes that if you don’t have any evidence for your claim, you don’t have any credibility when you make supernatural assertions based on old stories or any assertion for that matter. And it’s not “Tomayto, Tomahto”… it’s more like “Tomato, Guy on a cross being murdered in a blood sacrifice-o”