SPOOKY

85 Percent Of Gay People Are Possessed By Ghosts, Paranormal Researchers Claim

real-ghost-story-new-place-new-ghosts

A gaggle of paranormal researchers say they’ve discovered the root cause of homosexuality. It’s not genetic. It’s not the result of childhood trauma, either. It’s ghosts.

According to its website, the Spiritual Science Research Foundation is a “world leader in spiritual research.” In a new article titled Symptoms of Ghost Affecting or Possessing a Person, the groups claims that an astounding 85 percent of gay people are possessed by ghostly entities.

Related: Pastor Claims Gay People Are Possessed By “Fart Demons” That Can Drive Pigs To Suicide

“The main reason behind the gay orientation of some men is that they are possessed by female ghosts,” the article claims. “It is the female ghost in them that is attracted to other men.”

Conversely, the article continues, lesbianism is the result of women who suffer “the presence of male ghosts in them.”

“The ghost’s consciousness overpowers the person’s normal behavior to produce the homosexual attraction,” the article explains. “Spiritual research has shown that the cause for homosexual preferences lie predominantly in the spiritual realm.”

Related: Meet The Gay Demon-Hunting Homophobe Who Wants To Spank The Queerness Out Of You

Of course, ghost possession isn’t the only reason people are gay. The paranormal researchers put together this scientific-looking pie chart to explain other causes of homosexuality:

causes-of-homosexuality

“Due to being possessed by ghosts,” the article says, “the majority of the LGBT population is more susceptible to being influenced by negative energies who give them thoughts to encourage them to display their homosexuality in a shameless and even aggressive manner.”

This includes things like Pride festivals, parades, rallies, marches, and other public “showcases” of “exhibitionism and narcissism.”

Related: LGBTQ Kids Are Possessed By “Demonic Spirits” According To Linda Harvey

Pride parades are especially bad, researchers claim, because they “emit negative energy for up to 10 km. Indirectly, black covering (negative energy) over the city increases and it subtly spreads farther than 10 km.”

So what can be done about all this ghost possession and negative energy?

“Just as we teach children not to play in dirty water or eat mud, we need to educate society what is correct from a spiritual perspective,” researchers conclude. “By failing to do so, we run the risk of a further decline in Righteousness and consequently people in society will become more unhappy.”

Related: Paranormal Reality Series Aims To Assist Gay Ghosts In Coming Out Of The Closet

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22 Comments

  • jdboston617

    WTF did I just read. LMAO!

  • Charlie in Charge

    No wonder Halloween is our favorite holiday. I just pity that poor 15% of us that don’t have indwelling spirits.

  • Josh447

    I do entity depossession for a living. Everyone that’s gay is still gay and always was and always will be. Theory trashed. Boom!

  • ChrisK

    Ok I love this BS in movies. Mostly because through movie magic they can make it real. I even understand the ones that use it to make money and fame.

    This is the same as religion though and usually the same nuts. Big claims and zero evidence.

  • Kevin Wotipka

    “85 Percent Of Gay People Are Possessed By Ghosts” says the people listening to the voices in their heads.

  • Juanjo

    Well isn’t that just special

  • NateOcean

    Possessed? Damn right!

    I’ve sometimes felt that someone was inside me…my boyfriend!!

  • ErikO

    I have gay friends who have seen or experienced ghosts. I think it would be cool to experience one but if it never happens I’m fine with that. I’ve never had a seance or done anything like that, and I don’t want to invite anything negative like that into my life.

  • radiooutmike

    This seems like it should be a throwaway caption from Family Guy, The Simpsons or Futurama!

  • dean089

    Well that certainly explains all the drama.

  • Jack Meoff

    How does anyone take all this haunting and possession crap seriously in the first place let alone this claim that it’s responsible for homosexuality.

  • winebear

    What they actually found is that 85% of gay people are full of spirits…most prevalent being vodka and beer…

  • matt16

    As an extension of this, people who are attracted to both sexes are possessed by ghosts who like both sexes. Wait, no. That means that people like that actually existed in the past. Scratch that.

    People who are attracted to both sexes are possessed by ghosts who, when they were alive, were possessed by a make-you-gay ghost, and there’s some kind of diminishing returns. Wait, no. Then the paranormal isn’t that powerful. Fuck.

    OK, I got it. You’re either straight and fine, or possessed by a make-you-gay ghost. There’s no such thing as bisexuality or pansexuality or asexuality or gender fluidity because that fucks with our model.

    Yeah. Fucken nailed it. (The argument. Not a make-you-gay ghost. #nohomo)

  • Tête Carrée

    Who are these loony toons? Are they Trump’s shadow (ghost) cabinet?

  • dwes09

    @Josh447: “I do entity depossession for a living. Everyone that’s gay is still gay and always was and always will be. Theory trashed. Boom!”

    Sorry, fiction/conjecture cannot debunk fiction/conjecture…Boom. You are no more reality based than these people who claim ghostly possession causes homosexuality.

  • Heywood Jablowme

    So… why aren’t the other 15% of us possessed by ghosts?

    @Tête Carrée: It does sound like something Dr. Ben Carson might say!

  • TomMc

    What they failed to mention is that 98% of non-gay people are possessed by ghosts.

  • Realitycheck

    I thought spicy food for the reason for that unusual anal burning feeling….

  • FlyBy

    @dwes09: Speaking as a Spiritualist – you could not be more mistaken. Best not to attack others over something you have not yet come to understand dear.

  • Goforit

    @matt16: Not so fast Matt. If I am a gay male possessed by a female ghost attracted to another gay male that is possessed by another female ghost, wouldn’t that make us both pre-op, transsexual, lesbian men? Oh I am so confused.

  • Nate

    So… like does that mean the ghost is gay? And last time I checked ghosts were spirits of dead people. So does dying make you gay?

    Or does being possessed by a gay ghost make you gay when YOU die, thus strengthening the gay ghost army. This also implies that gays reproduce via spiritual possession.

    This has left me with more questions than answers. I need to bring this up with my resident ghost, to which I am a host for, to see if he’s heard anything about this.

  • radiooutmike

    You mean all my life I’ve been fighting ghosts?!

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